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sunshinelds
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Although I read and reread your post several times, I am unsure what you mean by the emergency part? 
Did he have shoulder dystocia (the stuck part)?
Did he have shoulder dystocia (the stuck part)?
Mervs Mum
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I think it's important to understand why your birth ended the way it did. Only a full debrief and understanding will tell you if what happened could have been avoided somehow.
On a basic level home birth is as safe as hospital for a second or subsequent baby and safer for mum. That's an easy reason to consider it. But if you're not sure then you should perhaps ask yourself where would YOU feel safest. Only you can answer that. The fact is that undisturbed birth is safest for most mums and babies. It's only when you start introducing interventions - which start from vaginal examinations and stretch and sweeps up. Undisturbed birth is rare.
On a basic level home birth is as safe as hospital for a second or subsequent baby and safer for mum. That's an easy reason to consider it. But if you're not sure then you should perhaps ask yourself where would YOU feel safest. Only you can answer that. The fact is that undisturbed birth is safest for most mums and babies. It's only when you start introducing interventions - which start from vaginal examinations and stretch and sweeps up. Undisturbed birth is rare.
lozzy21
Mummy to Niamh
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A lot of the problems that arise during a hospital birth can be avoided by simply being at home. It can be as simple as mum is on her back on the bed which makes the pain worse so she gets an epidural. Labour is controled by hormines and because mum is feeling stressed Contractions slow down so shes put on a drip to help speed them back up. When it comes to pushing because she's had the epidural she isent able to move around to get baby in the best position which coupled with the epidural makes pushing harder work. Mum gets tired so they use forceps to help deliver baby. Baby's head is born but then ends up with shoulder dystocia
Now I'm not saying that this was the case with Harrison but for a lot of women intervention could be avoided if the right things are done early on, like staying mobile and upright, feeling calm and safe during labour and by giving the body chance to do ot on it's own. Something that can be hard when your in hospital.
Now I'm not saying that this was the case with Harrison but for a lot of women intervention could be avoided if the right things are done early on, like staying mobile and upright, feeling calm and safe during labour and by giving the body chance to do ot on it's own. Something that can be hard when your in hospital.
booflebump
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I think a birth debrief will probably answer your questions better - and help you understand why things happened as they did. Bleeds before delivery are very rare, so it happening once doesn't mean it will happen again. As MM says - it's about where you feel safest, and if you were going to be worrying that the same was going to happen again, then maybe hospital is where you would feel safest?
Many women have c-sections and other obstetric emergencies with one child, and go on to have normal, vaginal deliveries at home or hospital with subsequent births - so how your labours are going to go aren't written in stone after your first child is born
xxx
Many women have c-sections and other obstetric emergencies with one child, and go on to have normal, vaginal deliveries at home or hospital with subsequent births - so how your labours are going to go aren't written in stone after your first child is born
xxx
madasa
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I could write a book on this topic. In fact, quite a lot of people already have! 
Ina May Gaskin, Michel O'Dent, Sarah Buckley, Sheila Stubbs...
My first baby was "stuck" (forceps delivery) and my second baby was born at home. Pretty obvious really, I do NOT think it is "foolish" to birth at home, even if your first birth was assisted. Frankly, I put a lot of thought and consideration into where my second child would be born (first time I just assumed hospital, because, well, that is where everyone goes to have a baby, right?) and I think this is what ultimately made it a better experience second time - ante natal education and preparation.
The truth is just BEING AT HOME reduces your risk of various complications and interventions.
A few words about SIZE:
So many doctors say things like "he was too big too get around your pelvis" that I can't help but feel skeptical at this. CPD (Cephalopelvic Disproportion) is rare, yet it is diagnosed all over the place! Drs insist that the mother must have a caesarean birth because her baby is just TOO BIG to be born vaginally.... and the mother then goes on to have a perfectly safe birth AT HOME next time.... often with (gasp!) an even bigger baby! Not saying it's the case with you at all, just throwing this out there so you know why it might be met with skepticism.
Here is the thing: the baby's size is not really THAT important in most cases. Can I ask - do you have diabetes? And how big was your baby?
Much more important is your environment
Is it familiar, homely, comfortable? are you calm? relaxed? undisturbed? do you feel safe? do you feel unobserved? do you have privacy? This is the environment you need for birth. You can sort of manufacture this environment in a hospital, but most of the time it is pretty hard. For a lot of people (not everyone!) this kind of environment is: their home.
MANY women find that their labour progresses beautifully at home. They move into hospital at the proper time and suddenly it slows or stops completely. This is because just BEING in the hospital has caused a release of adrenaline in their body and this has slowed things down. This is a survival mechanism: if there are predators around you want labour to stop until you are safely in your nest or den. if you don;t know the place well, there MIGHT be predators around, so the same thing happens. If there are people there you dont know well - same result. You might know, with your logical brain, that those people are there to help, but birth is not governed by the logical art of your brain. Another key thing here, is that when this happens, your body is sending blood (and therefore oxygen) to your heart and lungs, ready for "fight or flight". Your uterus and your baby are not used for fight or flight, so blood is directed away from there to other major organs. By staying at home, this pesky adrenaline release is avoided and birth is more likely to progress smoothly and unhindered.
Another important factor is your position
Are you upright? Can you move? Are you in tune with your body and moving intuitively? Your baby NEEDS you to move so that they can move into the best position to be born. You work together to meet one another Your baby is like a key, and your pelvis is like a lock. If the key isn't sitting right in the lock, then birth will be more difficult. If you are on a bed (not moving) then you aren't working with your baby; you're expecting him to get in a good position all on his own. If you've been numbed it's worse, bc it's harder to move around on the bed even, unless you have lots of help (and sadly a lot of the time the epi is viewed as a replacement for good support, which is a travesty!) Add to this the fact that if your baby is affected by drugs, they are less able to do THEIR part of the job. If you are pushing and pushing with the baby at an awkward angle... it's only going to make matters worse. A key clue for me is that the dr said your baby was too big to get AROUND the pelvis. When you are lying on your back, you have to push your baby round a kind of U-bend, uphill. It's bloody hard work! The mobile part of your pelvis is the back of it, and lying on it makes it about 30% narrower and much less flexible - harder to get a baby out of!
The key thing most of us want, is to avoid interventions, because while they are sometimes necessary, often they aren't, they just introduce risk and the need for MORE interventions, each one carrying MORE risk and the need for MORE interventions... and so on, "an intervention cascade". Often ending with a scenario pretty much like yours. The first intervention, the first deviation from a biological norm is: leaving your "nest".
A pattern I've noticed: the more time you give yourself to be exposed to the idea, the more it'll grow on you. Homebirth is a bit fringe, but it's ultimately appealing because at some point, biological imperative will tip the balance against cultural norms.
Ina May Gaskin, Michel O'Dent, Sarah Buckley, Sheila Stubbs... My first baby was "stuck" (forceps delivery) and my second baby was born at home. Pretty obvious really, I do NOT think it is "foolish" to birth at home, even if your first birth was assisted. Frankly, I put a lot of thought and consideration into where my second child would be born (first time I just assumed hospital, because, well, that is where everyone goes to have a baby, right?) and I think this is what ultimately made it a better experience second time - ante natal education and preparation.
The truth is just BEING AT HOME reduces your risk of various complications and interventions.
A few words about SIZE:
So many doctors say things like "he was too big too get around your pelvis" that I can't help but feel skeptical at this. CPD (Cephalopelvic Disproportion) is rare, yet it is diagnosed all over the place! Drs insist that the mother must have a caesarean birth because her baby is just TOO BIG to be born vaginally.... and the mother then goes on to have a perfectly safe birth AT HOME next time.... often with (gasp!) an even bigger baby! Not saying it's the case with you at all, just throwing this out there so you know why it might be met with skepticism.
Here is the thing: the baby's size is not really THAT important in most cases. Can I ask - do you have diabetes? And how big was your baby?
Much more important is your environment
Is it familiar, homely, comfortable? are you calm? relaxed? undisturbed? do you feel safe? do you feel unobserved? do you have privacy? This is the environment you need for birth. You can sort of manufacture this environment in a hospital, but most of the time it is pretty hard. For a lot of people (not everyone!) this kind of environment is: their home.
MANY women find that their labour progresses beautifully at home. They move into hospital at the proper time and suddenly it slows or stops completely. This is because just BEING in the hospital has caused a release of adrenaline in their body and this has slowed things down. This is a survival mechanism: if there are predators around you want labour to stop until you are safely in your nest or den. if you don;t know the place well, there MIGHT be predators around, so the same thing happens. If there are people there you dont know well - same result. You might know, with your logical brain, that those people are there to help, but birth is not governed by the logical art of your brain.
Another key thing here, is that when this happens, your body is sending blood (and therefore oxygen) to your heart and lungs, ready for "fight or flight". Your uterus and your baby are not used for fight or flight, so blood is directed away from there to other major organs. By staying at home, this pesky adrenaline release is avoided and birth is more likely to progress smoothly and unhindered.Another important factor is your position
Are you upright? Can you move? Are you in tune with your body and moving intuitively? Your baby NEEDS you to move so that they can move into the best position to be born. You work together to meet one another
Your baby is like a key, and your pelvis is like a lock. If the key isn't sitting right in the lock, then birth will be more difficult. If you are on a bed (not moving) then you aren't working with your baby; you're expecting him to get in a good position all on his own. If you've been numbed it's worse, bc it's harder to move around on the bed even, unless you have lots of help (and sadly a lot of the time the epi is viewed as a replacement for good support, which is a travesty!) Add to this the fact that if your baby is affected by drugs, they are less able to do THEIR part of the job. If you are pushing and pushing with the baby at an awkward angle... it's only going to make matters worse. A key clue for me is that the dr said your baby was too big to get AROUND the pelvis. When you are lying on your back, you have to push your baby round a kind of U-bend, uphill. It's bloody hard work! The mobile part of your pelvis is the back of it, and lying on it makes it about 30% narrower and much less flexible - harder to get a baby out of!The key thing most of us want, is to avoid interventions, because while they are sometimes necessary, often they aren't, they just introduce risk and the need for MORE interventions, each one carrying MORE risk and the need for MORE interventions... and so on, "an intervention cascade". Often ending with a scenario pretty much like yours. The first intervention, the first deviation from a biological norm is: leaving your "nest".
A pattern I've noticed: the more time you give yourself to be exposed to the idea, the more it'll grow on you. Homebirth is a bit fringe, but it's ultimately appealing because at some point, biological imperative will tip the balance against cultural norms.
tinytabby
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I'm planning a home birth... It's my first baby. I don't know how things will go - hopefully for the best - but if not my MW will tell me to go to hospital and I will trust that she would onl say that if it was necessary.
The first part of labour takes a long time and there's quite a big window in which they can identify whether things are taking a turn fo the worse.
The first part of labour takes a long time and there's quite a big window in which they can identify whether things are taking a turn fo the worse.
Mervs Mum
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Babies are much more likely to get 'stuck' when you're imobile be that through choice or otherwise. The thing that jumps out to me with the pelvic pain etc would be water. Hospital, birth centre or home - water supports SPD / or pelvic girdle pain abd us better than an epidural as you have the sensation to avoid over stretching, the soothing pain relieving properties and the ability to communicate with your baby fully. You said 'local anaesthetic'. Not sure what that would be but undisturbed birth is much more than what pharmaceuticals one has and any opiate or injectable will disturb birth in that you are unable to effectively communicate with your baby and body unless you're 'present'. You can still have a positive birth with and induction, epidural, opiates, failed forceps and emergency section! Positive doesnt necessary equal undisturbed!
Contrary to may people in my field, I don't hold much weight with the whole optimal fetal positioning in pregnancy. I believe (and have seen with clients and personal experience) that some babies NEED to enter the pelvis in a non-optimal position. It's about what happens to support a woman through that type of labour that will affect the eventual outcome. Eduction and preparation is key. You can't wing these things IMO and the more you learn, the more you stack the odds in your favour....
Contrary to may people in my field, I don't hold much weight with the whole optimal fetal positioning in pregnancy. I believe (and have seen with clients and personal experience) that some babies NEED to enter the pelvis in a non-optimal position. It's about what happens to support a woman through that type of labour that will affect the eventual outcome. Eduction and preparation is key. You can't wing these things IMO and the more you learn, the more you stack the odds in your favour....
JadeCrusader
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If you have Netflix, instant watch "Pregnant in America" and "The Business of Being Born". Those both give a lot of good information to people who are new to the whole homebirthing idea. Also, there have been studies and statistics done that show birthing at home is actually WAY safer than a hospital birth, for so many reasons. One moment while I dig up where I found the statistics sheet...
Like you said, your labor was 22 hours. Birth takes awhile and if at any time your midwife is worried, then immediate transport to the hospital would be initiated, I'm sure. She is not only going to have your best interest in mind, 100%, but if anything happens to you, then guess what? It's her fault, so she's going to be there helping to make the absolute safest decisions at all times, no matter what.
Like you said, your labor was 22 hours. Birth takes awhile and if at any time your midwife is worried, then immediate transport to the hospital would be initiated, I'm sure. She is not only going to have your best interest in mind, 100%, but if anything happens to you, then guess what? It's her fault, so she's going to be there helping to make the absolute safest decisions at all times, no matter what.
JadeCrusader
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https://www.facebook.com/note.php?saved&&note_id=371051256246078 here's a link to some statistics I pulled out of a good peer-reviewed article and put up on my facebook. I set it to public, so hopefully you can see it. Let me know if it doesn't work and I'll check it..
ZoeZo
Proper TTC Cycle 2011 #1
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Sorry you had a rough time last time 
I believe you have come to the right place though! I'm expecting my first in 7 weeks time, and was totally clueless about labour and birth before I starting searching the net (these forums and blogs) so far the BEST thing is learning and understanding how our bodies work, dunno if I'm brave or stupid, but I'm not afraid labour and birth at all, I trust my body and mother nature knows what to do and it's all perfectly natural and normal.
Understand why things happen during birth (stuck babies, induction, fear and intervention stalling labour) greatly helps I believe, which is why I feel I'll be better off at home. The idea of water is really appealing to me, I love lying in a bath or standing under the shower, I find it relaxing and comforting, so many people say it's a relief to get into the birthing pool - you can get out at any time too.
I've found www.midwifethinking.com to be fantasic, along with mamabirthblog and of course EverydayMiracleDoula on FB to be brilliant - before I thought all women went to hospital, gave birth on their backs, taking whatever drugs the midwives told you to take and pushing when they told you to push. Oh and I forgot to mention BIRTH WITHOUT FEAR https://birthwithoutfearblog.com/ also on facebook, I think if we can let go of the fear (which is only natural to be scared of birth!) that helps - I feel a bit hypocritical preaching my 'opinions' when I've not been through it yet, but these are my beliefs and I hope I'm still this positive when I go into labour!
https://midwifethinking.com/2010/12/03/shoulder-dystocia-the-real-story/
https://mamabirth.blogspot.com/2012/01/obstetric-lie-84-cpd-or-your-baby.html
I believe you have come to the right place though! I'm expecting my first in 7 weeks time, and was totally clueless about labour and birth before I starting searching the net (these forums and blogs) so far the BEST thing is learning and understanding how our bodies work, dunno if I'm brave or stupid, but I'm not afraid labour and birth at all, I trust my body and mother nature knows what to do and it's all perfectly natural and normal.
Understand why things happen during birth (stuck babies, induction, fear and intervention stalling labour) greatly helps I believe, which is why I feel I'll be better off at home. The idea of water is really appealing to me, I love lying in a bath or standing under the shower, I find it relaxing and comforting, so many people say it's a relief to get into the birthing pool - you can get out at any time too.
I've found www.midwifethinking.com to be fantasic, along with mamabirthblog and of course EverydayMiracleDoula on FB to be brilliant - before I thought all women went to hospital, gave birth on their backs, taking whatever drugs the midwives told you to take and pushing when they told you to push. Oh and I forgot to mention BIRTH WITHOUT FEAR https://birthwithoutfearblog.com/ also on facebook, I think if we can let go of the fear (which is only natural to be scared of birth!) that helps - I feel a bit hypocritical preaching my 'opinions' when I've not been through it yet, but these are my beliefs and I hope I'm still this positive when I go into labour!
https://midwifethinking.com/2010/12/03/shoulder-dystocia-the-real-story/
https://mamabirth.blogspot.com/2012/01/obstetric-lie-84-cpd-or-your-baby.html
booflebump
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Ignorance can be bliss....and if just going with the flow suits you, then that's as fine as making plans for your birth. For me, it would be impossible not to plan as I have firm thoughts on some aspects of the birthing process.
But at the same time, as much as that suits me, you have to be aware of your own limitations and fears surrounding birth and either workthrough them or accommodate your plans to fit around them if you don't think they are something you will ever be able or willing to resolve.
Have you ever looked in to hypnotherapy or hypnobirth? It sounds like it could help you work through some things if you have some fears
xxx
But at the same time, as much as that suits me, you have to be aware of your own limitations and fears surrounding birth and either workthrough them or accommodate your plans to fit around them if you don't think they are something you will ever be able or willing to resolve.
Have you ever looked in to hypnotherapy or hypnobirth? It sounds like it could help you work through some things if you have some fears
xxx
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