20 Kids and counting

[robinator]

What I take issue is with them basically saying that if God didn't want them to conceive another child, then He wouldn't allow it to happen.

Being a Christian myself with a personal relationship with God, the God I know also expects us to be smart. We know that if sperm meets egg while ovulating, we will conceive (esp the Duggars). If we are going to therefore have sex during that time, there is a very good chance a child will be produced. Unless He has His own reasons, He most likely will not step in and prevent a pregnancy when we knowingly went ahead and had sex during our fertile time. He did give us free will, after all, and He expects us to use the knowledge He gave us responsibly.

There is a couple at my former church who operates under this Duggar theory and what drives me especially nuts about their circumstance is only one of them works (at a not very well paying job) and they get state benefits. And yet they still have sex at the right time and put all responsibility on God to prevent pregnancy if that is His will. But the financial means vs. having children debate is another issue.

The Duggars can afford their kids financially, but I agree they cannot afford them emotionally. No matter how well intentioned, there is simply not enough time in the day to give each child the individual attention they need.

 

[Eternal]

yeah, thats what i believe we have choice over our lives, otherwise what would be the point if God run our lives for us? We are here because we need to make our own choices and how many children we have is one of those, i do think God does have a hand in it at times, but generally if you decide not to use contraception then you are making that decision and it has nothing to do with God.

 

[BrandiCanucks]

Apparently it didn't diappear

 

[BrandiCanucks]

Whoops...double post.

 

[alaskagrown]

Well let's thank God we all don't have that sort of mentality or humanity would be screwed

 

[trgirl308]

I think it depends on why you are having kids, as in if you want a lot of kids because you love them and like a big family that is ok... but it seems like they are intentionally making themselves a baby mill and that doesn't seem fair to the children who didn't choose that life. At least they have the financial means, I definitely have a problem with ppl who have multiple children and consistently live off benefits.

Fun fact that I just learned. When Canada was originally populated by the French the governor had a mandate to populate the land, so to encourage people to make babies they made a rule that education would be provided for free to the 26th living child and onwards. Now thankfully for the women the children were counted by filiation to the father... so if he had wives who died the new wife could add the former kids to her total... I love history.

 

[MummyMEE]

Just want to add my opinion ladies if thats ok? They say that the fate of their babies is up to god, well if I had gone through what they went through with the last one then I think I would be using contraception now! I think it is very selfish to put another baby through the risk of being born that prem again and also selfish to the siblings. Don't get me wrong, I admire the Duggars for some aspects of their life and how they make their money to provide for their family but surely 19 kids is enough for anyone!!

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

No way can you give each child the attention they need daily xx

 

[Yammas]

Nope that's why they try to make up for it by having 'buddies'

 

[Baby France]

No way can you give each child the attention they need daily xx

Completely agree.

Children's main priority is not financial care. Its emotional, physical and mental care...that a parent of 20 children cannot give.

That is IMO wrong. It doesn't matter what money you have, as long as you as a parent can provide a safe, stable upbringing for your child. (not relying on your other children)

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

I watched it once and it annoyed me, they went to New York (the parents) and the eldest were pretty much babysitting.

They make such a huge deal of J names too. Its such a publicity sham!

 

[Baby France]

I've never watched it and not quite sure I want to. I think it would infuriate me!

 

[punk_chick]

I know that this thread went quiet for a while and haven't found another so not sure if everyones aware but Michelle lost her baby who they named Jubilee Shalom at 19 week, my heart goes out to her and her family

 

[redpoppy]

I don't have an extreme view on the topic. If they are financially supporting their own kids then I don't see the problem. I think if they have extended family who help and the older children help out then that's cool too. I think it really depends on how it affects the mental health of the children.

MY cousin's gran had 18 and only 13 survived to adulthood. My dad is one of 9 and my mum one of six. I have a problem with people in Pakistran (where these people are from) having too many children as the population issue is a serious one and can be considered to be crippling society.

I don't know enough about the Duggars. I suppose I would fear they weren't right in the head and the mental/emotional wellbeing of their children would be a danger but I couldn't criticise people having so many kids just for the sake of it.

I would disagree with them "leaving it up to God" as they actively wean their kids at 6 months so they can get pregnant again. I think if we have solid proof that BFing kids to 2 years is highly beneficial (and I only managed 3 months) then they're not leaving it to God really. IMO.

 

[summer rain]

I read an interview with Michelle Duggar where she said that is absolutely not true; that she doesn't wean from BF at all at 6 months but her periods and fertility just naturally comes back very quickly for her-I have no reason to disbelieve her on that even though I am no fan of the Duggars xx

 

[summer rain]

https://babygooroo.com/2009/03/afte...duggar-continues-to-be-a-learning-experience/

 

[BrandiCanucks]

She said differently on her website prior to the TLC show. There was A LOT on that site that they have taken down because of the TLC show.

As much as I dislike the family, my heart goes out to them for their loss. I've had two miscarriages 10 weeks apart, and it is devastating to lose a baby. I hope that for the sake of her health and the sake of the 19 HEALTHY children they have, they take Josie's prematurity and this miscarriage as a sign from God to STOP.

 

[AirForceWife7]

While I don't match up with their lifestyle choices, my heart still goes out to them for their loss.

A loss at any age is difficult, regardless of how many kids you have.

 

[sarah0108]

I personally have no problem with the Duggars, the media will only show what they want us to see.

Heart goes out to them for their loss though x

 

[vaniilla]

I feel for their loss but as a family I can't stand them, I hate what they have turned their life into - a media circus, if what they were doing was private and kept to themselves fine people can do what they like but they aren't doing that, they have thrown themselves at the limelight, its about time their 15 minutes was up, sorry to anyone that likes them but they are a joke and a disaster imo.