30 something and TTC #1 for a year

[brassy]

Have you had any ultrasounds at all to make sure the clomid is working Hun? Any monitoring at all? How many rounds you done now? I found the more rounds i took the earlier I ovulated.. X

Hi MrsP! This was my first round, and had an u/s on cd11. I had two dominant follies. I ovulated on my own and had v.good lp lenght so I guess in my case the goal was to ovulate more eggs for better chances. I felt it messed up my cycle this time. However dr said its effectiveness peaks on cycles 2-3...

 

[MrsPTTC]

Good luck with it hun, it got me there in the end just took a while x

 

[brassy]

Thanks!

 

[Trulyoo]

Hi Old Friends!

A lot of you might remember me when we all first started the thread long ago.......when we all were writing about TTC naturally and all of our struggles. I haven't logged on for quite a while until today. And I am amazed at how many of your journeys have now entered into the realm of fertility treatment. I too, have started treatment. In fact, I've already had two failed IUI's. So here I am again, seeking support and assurance.

I also see some of you have gotten your BFP's! Congrats!

Aleja and MrsPTTC, I remember writing to you a while ago and now so happy things have worked out.
Mrs.G: We sound like we are on the same road And MK8, what are you doing now?

All of you ladies were there for me when I was just starting out........but now, how the path has changed. I'm wondering now if a lot of us who never got a BFP naturally were destined for treatment. How naive I sounded when I questioned my CM, and talks of vitimins, and ovulation, etc......when ultimately fast fowarding to now, I'm writing to you with an update of two failed IUI's. I want to so badly just do IVF and give myself a better chance of ending this nightmare. But DH wants to continue with IUI since IVF is 100% out of pocket.

Anyway, I just wanted to say hi to all my friends and glad to hear that some have had great news!

 

[MrsG2010]

Hi everyone!

Hi truly. I'm sorry about your failed iuis. I am in same boat. :/ what were your numbers for your iuis? Meds/ Follicles/sperms. Etc.

 

[GettingBroody]

Hi Truly! Welcome back. Sorry to hear things haven't worked out for you yet We went straight to ivf because dhs SA results were so low in all areas that there was no point in us trying anything else first. We also had to pay 100% out of pocket (oh, except for the meds which the government covers, tg!) but luckily for us it worked first time Sending you buckets of and good luck deciding what to do next

 

[mk8]

Welcome back Truly. I'm sorry you're feeling so down. This TTC journey certainly isn't easy. Who knew when we all started that so many of us would need help? It's a tough road but stay hopeful that it will happen. We have to right?

What type of iui did you go for? Medicated? If so what type? What were your follies, lining and dh results? I'm really sorry but I've forgotten if you and hubby were ever diagnosed with a reason for your infertility?

I ended up seeing a private specialist in the summer. We discussed my fertility test results (all "normal", just unexplained). He therefore suggested we try stimulated iui (low dose gonal f injections followed by trigger. I had tried clomid alone and it didn't work for me.). He also suggested back to back iuis (ie two inseminations in one cycle, done on two consecutive days). I could have had iui on a cost basis via the Nhs but the difference in price was minimal and the Nhs version would be more stressful as the hospital is miles away from my work (makes monitoring tough). So hubby and I opted for pvt iui at a clinic near by work. The less stress the better! However, treatment was delayed due to various other tests then olympics started and my fs went on holiday. After chatting with my mum she suggested we try naturally/ rest for a bit first. I agreed. TTC was becoming so stressful and my hubby and I decided to chill! I wouldn't say I'm totally carefree right now, far from it. I still worry but in trying hard to look after my health, eat and sleep better and enjoy Christmas! Bring on 2013!

My fs suggested three iuis in a row. Would you want to give it one more go before embarking on ivf? Has your iui protocol changed since your first one? I know it's tough truly, sadly we have all been there wondering why us and if it will ever happen, but try to enjoy your life with hubby as just you two for now (I strongly believe that we will all be mummies). Rest, at well, exercise. All good stuff for when you start treatment. I bought additional annual leave from work for 2013 so I can relax more!

Good luck honey.

 

[aleja]

Hi gals
Truly hello dear girl I am glad you are popping in. I am so very sorry you have had such a rough journey. I too remember being very worried about CM and getting the SMEP right! If only I knew back then that we needed IVF it would have saved me a whole year of unnecessary stress.

I am not sure what you will do in terms of another IUI or straight to IVF but I can tell you my opinion. At my age, 34 yrs the FS only gave us 15% success chance per IUI cycle compared to 50% with icsi (combining fresh + frozen embryos) . The decision was easier for us anyway as my DH has male factor issues.

It still took me 4 cycles (3rd frozen) to get a BFP and even now it's still early days.

It's hard to stay positive but let's remember we are still youngish. Most women in early to mid 30s fall pregnant with AC. I didn't believe this until recently either!

Mk, your chilled out lifestyle sounds lovely x

 

[Trulyoo]

Thanks for updating me, ladies……

I can almost remember some of our chats when we broke down stats of becoming pregnant. LOL, when we were all under one year of TTC, we all said statistically speaking we’d all get pregnant in a year or year and half time. How we clung onto every hope. But now I realize that maybe we did and can fit into that statistic, only maybe we weren’t talking about natural BFP’s. Here we all are now talking of drugs, and IUI’s and IVF’s. I really missed you guys……

Ok, so a refresh on my story. I’m 34 now, turning 35 in a couple months……..when I start with you guys I was 33. It’s been a little over 1.5 years of trying naturally. After one year though, we did go get testing……everything is normal. You guys were even there for me when I got my HSG. I remember writing posts about how I was worried about blocked tubes. Guess that wasn’t the problem. DH has great numbers, I make eggs, blah, blah, blah = UNEXPLAINED! (Oh how I despise that word). So finally, when I had had it when AF came in August, I told DH we were going to start IUI in October………….here are my numbers and protocol:

• Oct (2012) cycle: 50mg of Clomid + Trigger shot + 1 IUI = 3 follicles (16-18mm in size), only 5mil swimmers and thin lining……FAILED.
• Nov (2012) cycle: 50mg of Clomid (plus estradial for thicker lining) + Trigger shot + 1 IUI = 1 follicle (16mm in size), 20mil swimmers………FAILED

The FS wants to continue to IUI’s, maybe increase the clomid dose for the 3rd one, and then after 3 clomid cycles, they’d move onto injectables before IVF. Of course, the Dr. says we can move onto IVF anytime we want to if we have the means and no patience, but her advice is to give IUI’s more tries.

I’m skipping this month’s cycle (DEC) and I’m ovulating now and we are having a natural cycle. I’ll go back to do the 3rd one in Jan 2013.

So here’s my take on my situation. I don’t think I had great numbers on these IUI’s. So, technically, I can see how they failed. And my protocol seems pretty conservative. It doesn’t hurt any less………it does only take one sperm and one egg! I don’t know why the Dr. kept me on 50mgs of clomid twice (well, they said they don’t prescribe high dosage to women who ovulate on their own). But who cares! My follicles seem pretty small. They should be at least 20mm, I think. You can’t keep doing the same thing and expect a different outcome. Well, at least that applies to all other things in life…………nothing in the fertility world makes sense. Therefore, I’m going to ask for 100mg of clomid next time or add in some injectables like follistim or something.

I wish I could start IVF like some of you…………but we’re not ready financially for that. But then again, I don’t feel like I have much time left since 35 is around the corner. My husband said 5 IUI’s before even thinking about IVF. So, I don’t have a choice but to see how this all works out.

I don’t have any faith in IUI. The odds are super low………only a tad better than trying naturally so sometimes I feel like what is the point! What if my problem is that the sperm is not fertilizing the egg?, what if I have a hard shell, what if my egg doesn’t hatch? ………HERE I GO AGAIN with the questions just like in the beginning, except now, the questions seem more serious and insurmountable.

There you have it!!!

 

[Trulyoo]

Oh and one more thing........While I was gone from the forum these last few months, DH and I sold our condo and bought a big fat house hoping that a change in environment and aligning things in preparation for a family would change our luck. The stress level for this process was out the of this world!!!! Well, now we sit in a big empty house alone, there is a room dedicated for a baby, and there is no more stress but no baby either.....just us two once again Some plan.

 

[MrsG2010]

Sorry about your empty house feeling. Dh and I had similar feelings but about our Christmas card photo. The year after we married we did a couple picture for the Christmas card. I assumed we'd be adding baby bumps and children to those cards. Well not yet. So anyway this year I just bought plain cards, no photo. Seems silly but it bummed me out.

Your first iui looks very similar to mine. So I'm jealous that you were kept on 50mg and added something for lining Because of my lining my fs dropped me to 25mg and I complained About it. Didnt matter what I said. I ended up with less follicles. But Dh counts dropped so drastically it probably didnt matter.

 

[Trulyoo]

MrsG..........seriously, I wouldn't have agreed to a drop in clomid dosage. That's strange your FS did that. The estradiol did help me. The first IUI, I had a lining of 6mm. But the second time, with the drug, I increased the lining to 9mm. Still, I'm mad that my FS kept my dose at 50mg which resulted in only 1 follicle. She said that sometimes your body gets used to the same dose so you don't get a strong response, (OKAY!!!, SO why did you still give me the same dose knowing that???). Geez. So frustrating.

So it looks like for you, even though you had 1 follicle it was super big...just the sperm count was low. I seem to have had the exact opposite......small follicle but better sperm count than the first #IUI.

Either way, my friend said this to me which I do see in your cycles as well. Both don't seem to be strong contenders. First IUI's usually don't work, and then our second ones had at least one weak variable.

Will you do another one IUI next year or move onto IVF?

 

[mk8]

Hey again

Brassy, good luck with cycle 2! Come on eggies!

Truly, I'm sorry to hear you're feeling bummed. Hubby and I live in a small flat and I debated whether we ought to move for a fresh start etc. we decided against it due to cost, especially as we have to pay for all fertility treatment. Moving homes is so stressful as you say. Are you feeling ok now? How are your hormones and periods?

I hate the term unexplained too. And like you my mind went into overdrive wondering if my eggs are hard, dhs spermies don't like my egg, do I have a weird uterus that stops implantation, are there nk killer cells blah blah. Drove me insane. Def one of the toughest times in my marriage. I feel awful but I blamed dh for not wanting to try earlier. I blamed myself for being "incompetent". I felt empty. I was scared out of my mind about being just us two. Fear returns to me now and again. But I'm trying hard to appreciate the things I have: loving dh, own home, wonderful mum and siblings, good friends, a job and my health. I figure I can TTC whilst stressed or TTC whilst happy. I opted to try the latter.

People keep saying the old line (which I'm sure we all hate) "relax and it will happen", but a lot can be said for that. It affects our hormones etc. balanced hormones help make babies.

Personally, I'd recommend looking into other meds. I know clomid is a wonderful drug but I've seen on iui threads much more success with injectables. Are you paying for iui treatment? Your doc suggested 6 iuis? Interesting! My doc suggested 3 then return if no luck and discuss again. Oh my doc also recommends cyclogest to help progesterone levels, which I thought was a super idea as I'm sure there's a luteal phase defect issue. Good luck on whatever you decide truly.

Aleja- how are you feeling my dear? Any symptoms? Doing ok? You still on any meds? What's the next step? What are you doing during your early pregnancy. Take care if you!

Mrsp- how are you Hun? I think you should have had your second scan right? How did it go?

Broody- Hola mamma to be! All ok? What have you been up to? How's baby?

Everyone else: hi!!

 

[Trulyoo]

Mk8............when I was in the process of buying, selling and moving, my periods were regular but i would have some serious spotting, cramping and all sorts of weird stuff. But it's all normal again. Clomid did help me with progesterone alot. They always tested me a week after my IUI for progesterone to make sure I ovulated and that the trigger shot worked. Sure enough, progesterone was up the roof. I was so happy and even had false hopes that the numbers would mean I was pregnant. I went from 4nmol (I forget the measurement) to 57!, so if I had gotten pregnant it would have been viable.

So what I learned is this about IUI's here. After three clomid IUI cycles, your odds go way down.......so they switch you out to injectables+IUI which they try for another 3 cycles. That's a total of 6 IUI's in all but technically only 3 of each protocol. I guess after that, you're screwed and you better just go on your way to IVF

I heard that injectables work a lot better because your eggs are a lot more mature and you have less side affects. Does anyone know if that is true? I didn't have any affects from CLomid at all, maybe that's because my dose was low.

I hate IUI's....and again,have no faith in them........But then, I always hear about women who get their BFP after 4, 5, 6, 7 times! So, I'm on the fence. Does it really work or not? And how many times is right for me? I just don't know. DH says 5, no if, ands, or buts about this with him. I tried already to debate this.

And I'm really tired of blaming this on stress. Stress is not causing my infertility. My infertility is causing my stress! It's a infinate circle! I totally understand about the blame game. DH and I were starting that too. I blame him for making us wait until he finished grad school, and I keep asking myself if maybe his sperm just doesn't like my eggs, maybe we have a chemical incompatibility...And then he blames me for stressing and not taking better care of myself........ANOTHER infinite cirle.

"Please baby, please come to us and stop this madness"!!

 

[mk8]

Truly, are you paying for iui? How much is it? So your dh wants to do 3 more iuis before moving on to ivf, so three more months right? So are you thinking of moving on to ivf now?

 

[Trulyoo]

We have insurance that covers 50% for IUI which means currently each cycle is costing us about $700 dollars. They don't cover IVF though. We are on our own for that.

I do feel like maybe I should do a couple more before giving up. But I'm also pretty sure if I don't get pregnant early next year, IVF is gonna happen sometime mid next year. If I have to finance and borrow, I'll do it, I do whatever it takes....

 

[mk8]

Wow 700 bucks only? Amazing. Obviously not great you have to pay at all but excellent price compared to other people ive read about. Mine is coming in at around £1200. Injectables are a lot more!

I think trying iui another two times is ok, but of course its up to you and dh. Ive read success is higher with injectables. On clomid my period was so light so im guessing my lining wasnt thick or dense enough.

 

[MrsPTTC]

Welcome back trulyoo! Sorry to hear you've no BFP news yet, but I'm sure it's around the corner for all of you still TTC. Our FS said we had the option of 5 free rounds of IUI on the NHS, so there must be a good chance if they'd waste government money on 5 rounds I guess? We were so scared of taking the more invasive routes of IUI & IVF we stuck to the clomid by itself for a few more months & got there after 8 rounds though have to admit I had little faith in it working!

Hi mk I'm great thanks, I had my scans ages ago now lol. LO was being awkward though & I had to go back at 23 weeks for another one Everything perfect

Hope everyone is ok x

 

[mk8]

Excellent news mrsp! When's ur actual due date?

 

[brassy]

Hello ladies!
Hi Trulyoo, I am a new addition to this wonderful group of ladies (I love your picture)!
Ladies, I think I am the one who is hearing her biological clock ticking louder and louder! I am 35 and in a few months I will be 36!
Unfortunately DH's third sa was the worst of all. Not sure why this happened! MrsG we are on the same boat regarding DHs' spermies deterioration...
We have booked an appointment next week with a dr specializing on male infertility, so we'll see.
What is really worrying for me right now is that DH is not handling this issue very well. A couple of days ago the moment he entered the house after work he burst into tears. Yesterday he was crying again after he got the results. We have been together for almost 8 years and he has always been so calm and he rarely gets stressed. I am usually the one that is worrying and gets stressed about things, but this time I am trying to be calm and composed.
So, I guess I am not going to do a second clomid cycle right after this one until we decide what to do next. Although with clomid I had the worse pre-ovulation pains ever I have to say that my pms symptoms are lighter.
Hope we all get our long deserved bfps soon! INFERTILITY SUCKS!