37 yrs old - considering 3 pregnancies in 3 years???

[mumof4sons]

Hi :wave:

I am 37years old (38 in 5 months). I have a 17 year old son, a 12 year old son, an almost 10 month old son (born by c-section) and am now 23 weeks pregnant with another boy. My husband (34) and I (married 18 months) are are trying to decide weather we should try for 1 more baby after this pregnancy or if I should have my tubes tied when I go in for the c-section??

We are both split down the middle with this one and only have a short period of time to make our decision. We both would like to have 1 more but are wondering if it would just be too much stress on my body at my age to have 3 pregnancies so close together.

If we decide to go ahead and try for 1 more we would have to do it fairly soon after this one due to my age and the associated risks for the baby, but I have read that having babies so close together can also be a risk for the baby.

We know we are truly Blessed now and we would be happy to stop after this one but we just have that lingering feeling that maybe we are supposed to have one more and because of that we think to have my tubes tied now is a drastic step to take. My body rejects any form of hormonal contraception so that would not be an option after my baby is born - so realistically having my tubes done at the same time as the c-section is the most logical thing to do.

I know no one can help with the decision we have to make but if anyone has had 3 babies in 3 years at a similar age I would greatly appreciate hearing of your experiences.

 

[ciarhwyfar]

While the possibility of something being not quite right does go up with age, I believe that they make way too much of it. Do your own research as well. I had my last one at 39 and I will be 43 four days after due date on this one. My cousin had her only two children at 37 and 39. None of the ones who have been born have anything wrong with them and everything looks good for this one as well. You will find that many women on this board have had healthy children after 35, I believe that one was 47.

Obviously, you will have to decide what is right for you and your family but I think that several children in a short period of time is more likely to be damaging than giving it an extra year or two. Just my two cents worth. Good luck with what ever you decide.

 

[poppy666]

With my eldest 3 boys i had them in the space of 3yrs but i was 21,22 and 23. This time around i had my 4th boy at 40 and expecting again at 41 but this is my last dont think my body would take another

 

[alison29]

Can't you just get an IUD put in if you decide not too ttc. Tubes tied is so final and what if you change your mind?

 

[xxembobxx]

If you and your husband are unsure then I would wait before proceeding with a permanent procedure to not have any more children.
I'm having my 5th baby 18 months after my other LO and for me there was no question we would consider having another so soon! But then my OH isn't keen on any more and I think I am done having kids too. Besides which I have this dread that 2 babies close together is going to be HARD work.
I think you're very brave for considering 3 babies so close together and I'm quite admiring as I know I just wouldn't cope.
I'm looking into sterilisation but don't know what's involved so I don't know if it's easy to arrange later on, I have heard a lot of women have it straight after their c-section so they only have to cope with one bout of major surgery. Perhaps this might be a factor in your decision?
Good luck whatever you decide x

 

[mumof4sons]

Thanks Ladies

@ciarhwyfar - I do believe that I am still putting out some 'good eggs' and have no doubt that I will for a few more years. I think your right that there is too much hype about the mothers age when it comes to risks. Thank you for your words - I think that if we do decide to go again, we would be fine to wait maybe a year or so. Is just tricky when my body rejects contraception.

I guess the reason I am a little worried is because my OB told me that once I hit 38 the risk factors increase - like as soon as my birthday comes around my eggs will spoil!! I wont buy into that.

@poppy666 - thank you, how wonderful that you are now Blessed again with 2 little ones again so close together, that is inspiration for me to hold off for another year or so before trying again (if we do).

@xxembobxx that is true - I am considering my tubes done at the time of c-section to mimimise the procedures I have to deal with.

@alison29 - while the IUD sounds like a great idea - for some reason my body also rejects those!
I have a really sensitive body when it comes to anything that messes with my hormones, (having said that I am now wondering if having my tubes done will make my body go crazy too??)

Thanks Ladies, you have given me some things to ponder.

Blessings to you all

 

[seoj]

I concur with much of the advise... if you think there is a decent chance you'd want another baby, I would hold off on any permanent birth control procedures. You seem to have no issue getting pregnant, so there is no reason to think that suddenly, when you hit 38 you'd have issues. As every woman is different. Personally, I had issue TTC at age 37 due to higher FSH levels... but there are woman in their 20's with the same issues... and women in their 40's with NO issues... it truly varies.

As for temporary birth control- are there any other options besides hormones? Do they offer the hormone free IUD in your area... I'm thinking that will be my option after baby as we are pretty sure we don't want to TTC again... but aren't 100% ready to close that door... for now. Birth control can certainly be a pain... I'd just have hubby get a vasectomy when we are for sure done, but as he went through two reversals in our journey TTC, I can't ask him to do any more down there!

If you do hold off, for now, then you can have your tubes done with your next pregnancy (if you have a c-section).

Best of luck with everything!

 

[costgang]

i had josh in aug 2009 and sophie in aug 2010 and i never had problems with them, im 35 next month and weve decided we r gonna have 1 more before i get too old

 

[MamaBearX4]

I'm 39 and pregnant with my 4th child. I was pregnant last year but lost our baby, he did have down syndrome. In my case, i feel I ovulated before the egg matured. I o'd that cycle on day 9! I have always ovulated around day 19 or more. We werent trying to get pregnant but was avoiding my fertile time. We have learned alot about our marriage since then and we have reconnected with God. After he was born, I was done but then felt something else in my heart. Trust me, I was so scared but we have relied so much on God during this pregnancy. We have opted out of testing but have been so well looked after and all scans have been perfect. I have faultered so many times but we are so close to seeing our baby, I'm so thankful to God for being our rock.

Look deep into your heart and see if you are really done having children. This is our last and I feel at peace with that and thats the feeling you should have before commiting to birth control.

And i hear you about bc, I dont like the idea of artificial hormones, but getting your tubes tied shouldnt affect you since its natural and no artificial hormones are going into your body.

God bless

 

[mumof4sons]

...well we have come to the conclusion that we will not try for another one after this. We are lucky to be as Blessed as we are now. Also I have an autoimmune disorder that is 6x more likely to be inherited by females so we will stop after this pregnancy and just enjoy all the love and happiness our boys will bring to our lives.

My husband was the one to make the call on it after much consideration and for us it has been "both in or both out" from the start of this important decision so I readily agreed without hesitation or regret.

Still not 100% sure if I will get my tubes tied when I have my c-section but to me it still seems like the logical thing to do considering my inability to take hormonal contraception. I probably will - life will be simple and we will be free to do our thing without ever having to worry about conception.

I feel fine about this decision and surprisingly am not worried about not having a girl - will just have to wait for my 4 sons to bring in some grand-daughters for me. I have been extreemly Blessed with my sons.

 

[ciarhwyfar]

...well we have come to the conclusion that we will not try for another one after this. We are lucky to be as Blessed as we are now. Also I have an autoimmune disorder that is 6x more likely to be inherited by females so we will stop after this pregnancy and just enjoy all the love and happiness our boys will bring to our lives.

My husband was the one to make the call on it after much consideration and for us it has been "both in or both out" from the start of this important decision so I readily agreed without hesitation or regret.

Still not 100% sure if I will get my tubes tied when I have my c-section but to me it still seems like the logical thing to do considering my inability to take hormonal contraception. I probably will - life will be simple and we will be free to do our thing without ever having to worry about conception.

I feel fine about this decision and surprisingly am not worried about not having a girl - will just have to wait for my 4 sons to bring in some grand-daughters for me. I have been extreemly Blessed with my sons.

I am very glad that you both could come to a decision that works for you and your family and that you feel it is the right decision. Good luck with all of your little ones!

 

[goodgiftforme]

wow ... too much