5 weeks & still struggling

[Angelica]

Think its time to accept that bf is just not working fir us

Been up for 50 mins now, lo latching on, sucking for few secs then pushing herself off, getting frustrated only for me to now give her a bottle!!

Wats the bloody point?!

 

[optimistic1]

I'm sorry your still struggling!!!! Ive been through some stressful times while bfing and I could sit here and promise you a million times over that it gets better just hang in there (it does get better) but if your okay with switching to bottle feeding and you honestly feel you can't go on with bfing anymore then don't feel bad! There are tons of woman that went through the exact same thing as you! I made a post awhile back in ff section when I was thinking about switching and the ladies were so helpful and supportive and they actually are the reason I continued bfing they convinced me to give it another shot but if I couldn't go on that they were there for me to help me through the switch.

Do what your comfortable with!

 

[staralfur]

She's probably going through a bit of a growth spurt (honestly, the first six weeks are pretty much one big growth spurt).

They are constantly needing more milk when they're growing and they can get a bit frustrated when it doesn't happen right away (likely why she's popping off). But the only way she's going to increase your supply is by continuing to nurse. In a week or two your supply will start to even out and things will calm down.

I remember those nights where I felt like I spent hours just latching her on; they won't last forever.

I know it's terribly exhausting and frustrating, but the clusterfeeding is completely normal and necessary in the early days.

 

[CupcakeBaby]

It was a struggle for us for at least 8 weeks.

It was much much better by week 10 though. Xx

 

[cartwheelroll]

No one tells you that breastfeeding would be so hard do they?! My LO is 11 weeks now and were getting on great but it really took a good 6/7 weeks before we got it right so it will happen eventually if you persevere. That said, if you're really not happy with it then there really is no problem with switching to formula, being happy together is the most important thing so do whatever feels best for you both. Good luck!!

 

[Angelica]

Problem is i still really want to breastfed but it seems like i cant & this is making me feel like a failure & i feel somewhat guilty everytime i give lo a bottle!!

But wat could i have done diff last nite? If after 45 mins of latching on/off, crying wat are my options??

A lactation consultant from lll said she charges £120 for 2 hour consultation, im wondering if i should fork out for this now??

Help

 

[cat lover]

If u are really determined then it might be worth it. How are his nappies and weight gain? Sounds like hemay be getting used to the fast flow of the bottle and frustrated at the breast? Im sure the best advi e is to ditch the bottle but i totally get how hard that might be, we combifed from about a month

 

[CupcakeBaby]

£120 is a lot less than you'd spend on formula over a year. I'd definitely pay it.

 

[optimistic1]

Its worth the price of they can help you continue bfing! I agree she might be getting irritated with your breast because she's getting used to the faster flow of the bottle and probably starting to prefer it..

 

[Angelica]

Yes i think that she is also getting used to the fast flow of bottle too!!
But how can i change this now without stressing lo, myself & generally stressing the whole family out??

 

[TheNewMrs]

Angelica, I have been reading your posts for a while now and I find it very hard to express what I want to say via text only so please take what I say with love and sincerity because I was right where you are, quit, and put myself through 6 weeks of exhaustion relactating to right my wrongs.

I feel like a lot of what's going on would be just having unrealistic expectations of what a breastfed baby is like?
Feeding hourly is normal. Fussiness at the breast during growth spurts is normal. The first 13-16 weeks are just like one huge growth spurt. They are so hard when we live in a formula feeding culture. I also read that you are not comfortable BF in front of male member of your family so that must make you feel really pressured to just give a bottle. Giving the bottle only makes you feel worse because the babies instinct is to suck and the baby will overeat from a bottle and seem more settled. The trust is they are just over full, bloated and wreaked from digesting artifical milk. When the baby lays there "contented" you are feeling it.

I really feel like for you that spending the money on the LC would be so beneficial for you and your baby. If you feel like investing in your BF relationship is what you want to do then please work away. You and your baby deserve the best shot at this you feel like you can give.

 

[Angelica]

Thank u! I do hear wat ur saying!!
I guess i need some advice on how i can reduce amount if formula now?
And i will call gp & see if they prescribe dompedirone??
I dont even mind if i have to express & feed lo but at the moment im lucky to get 3oz from both breasts which isnt enough for her!!

 

[Angelica]

So far this mrng i havent given any formula but now as soon as shes off the breast shes crying!!
She looks drowsy tho & even nodded off for all of 5 mins but now shes up again!
Shes dozing off then nipple slips out of mouth, wen she realises shes gtg frustrated & looking for it again!!!
Is this normal for 5 week old?

 

[Angelica]

She slept for half an hour then woke up & started screaming again!
My nipples hurt now & i also had to feed myself & 5 year old dd so i had to give her 3oz of formula in the hope that it keeps her calm for a bit!!

This is wat i mean tho... If this behaviour is truly
Normal how do those of u with other kids cope?? Im at my wits end??

Wats to say a lactation consultant can make this better??

 

[CupcakeBaby]

An hour and a half is a good long stretch for a tiny baby to go between feeds for.

My nipples hurt so bad I cried everyday for 8 weeks.

If you truly want to BF then it is a struggle I'm afraid.

I didn't have a clue how I was going to cope but now we're 16 weeks in and it's much better. I couldn't bear the thought of DD having formula so I had no choice really but to get through it.

 

[TheNewMrs]

It is normal. 90 mins is a great strectch for a newborn. 5 weeks is so tiny. A lot of the problem could be that you do keep giving the formula so your body isn't getting a chance to build supply to meet babys need. I really do not think you would need domperidone at all, really just feed baby on demand. Yes they are demanding!

Lots of mums with older kids find that preparing snacks while baby sleeps really help. Sandwiches, pastas, stews caseroles ect, anything that can be bunged in the microwave or oven to warm up quickly. Granola bars, potato salads ect. You need to be prepared to only eat with one hand for the first few months at least. So keep that in mind when preparing meals.

Using a sling helps keep baby happy as well as it provides skin-skin and they seem to stretch longer sleeping because they have your warmth, heartbeat and smeel to make them feel safe and secure. Leaving both hands free for older child/ meal prep/ whatever you need to do .

 

[Angelica]

No she slept for 30 mins not 90
Im on the verge of tears!

 

[TheNewMrs]

30 mins is very average I would think.
It is exhausting. Do you have a husband/partner? Family living close by?

 

[summer rain]

Some babies are just very alert and wakeful, my middle son never napped in the day for more than 10 minutes at a time and he was on formula from 3.5 months. His sleep didn't improve after being switched to formula. Some babies if given formula it may not be instant but while it seems to calm them immediately you pay for it later on that day or even the next day as its harder to digest. I have four other kids under ten and they are all at home with me. For the first few weeks things weren't too bad but between week 6 and 12 (this week) my son became a lot more 'clingy' and demanding. My OH is barely ever here, he is self employed and has to work 7 days a week just to pay the bills. It's rough but I would find FF harder in the long run as after a few months BF is always easier xx

 

[BunnyN]

When LO was about 2 weeks old my OH went to work and I was left on my own for the first time since she was born. He left me sitting in bed feeding her, he came home in the afternoon and I was still sitting in bed feeding her. I had only gotten up a couple of times to change her nappy, the rest of the time was spent feeding, burping, getting her to sleep for 5 mins, then starting again. I hadn't eaten or drunk anything and was desperate to pee, shower and get dressed! After that I learned a lot of tricks like leaving snacks and drinks where I could reach them. At 6 weeks she was feeding 8 to 10hrs out of 24. It got much, much easier for me at about 8 weeks. My supply got better and she got good at sucking.

I think you are doing amazingly, especially with another kid to look after. If you can and want to stick it out it will get easier, you are so close to feeling the benifits of all the hard work youre putting in. In the long run BFing is so much easier than FF and is very rewarding but the first weeks can be rough.

How much formula are you feeding a day? If it isn't a lot you may just be able to cut it out right away. She will be hungry and fussy for the 1st 24hrs but hungry babies feed a lot and that will increase your supply quickly. If she is getting a bigger amount you might need to reduce the amount over a period of time, either by giving less each time, or less often. I think a lactation consultant could give you some good advice on how to go about it. If that is too expensive for you have you could try a helpline from a breastfeeding support organization like the LLL.