5 Years TTC

[JaiJaiS]

hello
ok so heres my story...

my boyfriend and i had been together for 5 years and last year i went for tests at a hospital to check that i was ovulating as i hadnt fallen pregnant. we are both young and werent TTC however we both agreed that we would be happy should i fall pregnant.
whilst waiting for my results i found out that i was pregnant, however sadly i lost the baby just two days later. am still struggling to cope with the loss. my results came back normal however it has been 14 months since that happened and i havent fallen pregnant again, and am now going back to the hospital for more tests.
my boyfriend has chrones disease, which can affect fertility and i was underweight last year, so we put down the long time in falling pregnant to that - however my boyfriend hasnt suffered from his chrones for over 8 years and i am now at a much healthier weight, but still nothing.
i was 19 when i lost our baby and am soon to be 21, and had hoped to fall pregnant again before my 21st - however thats now just two months away so im not too hopefull.
ive always wanted children, and luckily my family and boyfriend are very supportive - im taking a degree at uni and am not one of these young girls just wanting a flat or something like that! due to health problems it is unlikely that i will be able to have children in my thirties (hence wanting them so young) so its very distressing not to be falling pregnant.
my boyfriend and i agreed that we wouldnt do home ovulation tests etc, as we didnt want to put that kind of pressure on ourselves - we both agreed that letting it happen on its own was the best way forward - and i still believe that.
am nervous for my day 21 test as not sure what to expect, my periods are regular and "normal" (for me anyway!) which leads me to believe that i am ovulating, however i was told that 90% of couples who experience m/c will go on to concieve within 12months - so im in the 10% who dont - which is upsetting.
however i am trying to keep positive and am hopeful that the hosp will be able to help get to the bottom of whats going on


JaiJaiS


xxx My Angel 3.5.10 xxx

 

[addy1]

Sorry to hear about your loss, and your 14 month wait for another BFP. I know you said you didn't want to use OPK's, but I used them for the fist time in Feb. and found that I acutally ovulated a bit later than I thought. (I did get me BFP, but it did end in a m/c). I'm using them again this time. Hoping we are lucky again!

 

[JaiJaiS]

thank you for your reply and advice, will wait and see what happens with ovulation test at hosp and providing all ok may look into trying the home ovulation kits - just wary of it becoming a chore more than it being something natural! as tend to get very obsessive as it is!
am sorry to hear of your loss but admire your positivity - and i wish you all the luck for the future lets hope that we will both be mummies soon xxx

 

[auntySmeghead]

Sorry to hear you are going through this. I know exactly how you feel. It took us 5 years to concieve the first (unexplained infertility) and then I lost the baby, that was 12 months ago without a bfp.

Has your boyfriend had tests too?

I dont think putting pressure on yourself to get pregnant by a certain date is very helpful as it just adds extra stress.

I get really fed up with people when they tell me 'miracle stories' about people adopting, who fall pregnant just because they 'stopped trying' - but there is a lot of truth in it. Maybe it helped you the first time because you put less pressure on yourself while you were waiting for your results.
I know its easier said than done and you cant just 'relax' as everyone says but you can help yourself by not adding extra pressure to yourself to get pregnant in a certain time frame.

I'm not saying give up, just dont be too hard on yourself.
I was halfway through an IVF cycle when I found out I was already pregnant the first time after 5 years never having a BFP before because I gave up trying. I just wish there was some way I could do it again!