6th round of clomid,adhesions,male factor.....im debating giving up

[louimum]

hey girls sorry but i just need a rant. as the title says im approaching 6th clomid cycle (im actually 3days late for af but not holding out any hope as this happened the other month on clomid, i feel af crampy and sore boobies so im 99% sure the witch is around the corner)
we have been ttc nearly 4yrs, i had 2operations due to adhesions. hopefully they have been removed 6month ago but still not bfp. my hubby has ok sperm count (37mill) but rubbish motility (16%) and morphology (3%)
ive quit smokiing, taken all the vits, been stressed, tried relaxing, tried yoga, meditation etc etc i just dont know what else im going to do. my heart is breaking constantly. im full of self pity and cant snap myself out of it anymore. i love my hubby but he isnt great with the tlc that i need
we have been referred for ivf but dont know if we will get funding due to our postcode and the fact i have a son. my partner doesnt have any kids and its so unfair. life can be so cruel.
sorry for the depressing rant i just dont know what to do or where to turn. i cannot face ivf at the min, i feel i have very little support, im about 1.5stone over weight and truely believe my stress etc would make the ivf not work anyway.
good luck to everyone xxxxxxxxxx

 

[Peanut78]

Hi Hun,

I'm sorry you are having a rubbish time and feeling down. I too appear to have some adhesions around one part of my internal c-section scar - although it's yet to be confirmed. Can I ask where your adhesions were and how it was to have them removed? The obs/ gynae I asked about the adhesions I have said it shouldn't be an impediment to another pregnancy, but if I wanted to get rid of them I would have to see a surgeon.

 

[louimum]

hi huni it was my gyne/fert specialist who found the adhesions when i had my lap and dye due to my infertility, he said as mine were so bad i had to go on to have full laparotomy to remove them all and put me back to ''normal''. he said most people's adhesions can be removed during a lap and dye but mine were too bad unfortunatly.
have you had a lap? if you havent it is honestly nothin to worry about at all, i was sooooo nervous but it was fine. usually only under for about 20-30min and as its keyhole there is hardly any pain at all. bloating from the gas they fill you up with but thats it and was home within a couple of hours.
my laparotomy was a 3hr op and i was told id be in for 2-3days but i was allowed home after 24hours as i got myself up and about put some make up on etc so they would let me home haha. again i was so so nervous but it was fine, if you have had a section its exactly the same recovery etc.
if you havent had a lap how does your cons know you have adhesions?
good luck xxxx

 

[Peanut78]

hi huni it was my gyne/fert specialist who found the adhesions when i had my lap and dye due to my infertility, he said as mine were so bad i had to go on to have full laparotomy to remove them all and put me back to ''normal''. he said most people's adhesions can be removed during a lap and dye but mine were too bad unfortunatly.
have you had a lap? if you havent it is honestly nothin to worry about at all, i was sooooo nervous but it was fine. usually only under for about 20-30min and as its keyhole there is hardly any pain at all. bloating from the gas they fill you up with but thats it and was home within a couple of hours.
my laparotomy was a 3hr op and i was told id be in for 2-3days but i was allowed home after 24hours as i got myself up and about put some make up on etc so they would let me home haha. again i was so so nervous but it was fine, if you have had a section its exactly the same recovery etc.
if you havent had a lap how does your cons know you have adhesions?
good luck xxxx

Thanks for the info

I haven't had a lap yet, not sure I would in my case as my suspected adhesions are related to my internal c-section scar. They think some of the tissues grew together as as the layers were healing after my c-section. I get an uncomfortable tugging sensation whenever I laugh, sneeze move in certain ways etc on the right hand side of my scar. That area of my internal scar also protrudes and is quite hard. So it isn't necessarily related to the organs on the inside iykwim...

I'm seeing my gynae for a follow-up next week, will ask her more about it then...

 

[louimum]

Well hun i think if i was you id ask for a lap if your ttc especially. I was lucky considering the mess i was in my tubes are clear. I had a hsg 1st which showed clear tubes but my gyne still wanted do a lap due to the length ive been ttc and the fact ive had previous surgery.
Have u been ttc long?xx

 

[Peanut78]

Well hun i think if i was you id ask for a lap if your ttc especially. I was lucky considering the mess i was in my tubes are clear. I had a hsg 1st which showed clear tubes but my gyne still wanted do a lap due to the length ive been ttc and the fact ive had previous surgery.
Have u been ttc long?xx

Well, the thing is we haven't been ttc #3 yet - we are just starting. But I have had mid-cycle bleeding ever since I stopped bf'ing a year ago. My gynae ran a series of blood tests, which showed elevated fsh and a slightly low AMH result. They are also not sure I am actually ovulating (my LH level suggested not, but then my cycle was wonky so hard to tell). A pelvic sonogram revealed thickened lining (much thicker than it should be) and that there appears to be a cyst in my actual lining which they expect appeared as a result of some scarring to the uterus either during my c-section or shortly after when I had a D&C due to some retained tissue.

I just had another D&C with a hysteroscopy on Monday. She didn't see any cysts or scarring there so who know's what's going on. She would like to put me on clomid to ensure I ovulate and mentioned the possibility of a lap and dye further down the road as there is always a small risk of damage to the tubes during c-sections...

So that's where we are at, feel like I've been hit by a whirlwind and have so many questions...