9 months ttc and starting to feel "over it"

[hercules]

So hubby and I have been ttc for 9 months now. We have tried it all..eating better, cutting caffeine, prenatals for over a year now, temping for about a year now, even made hubby throw out undies and get new ones! Sat with legs in the air, slept with pillows under my butt. Tried bbd'ing every day, every other day. You name it, we have tried it and NOTHING!
I can safely say at this point I am OVER IT. I am starting to believe that some people just can't have kids, and we are one of those couples. I'm not saying we will never have kids, I just don't think we can have them "naturally." I'm certain if we go to the doctor (again) he can help us to have babies...So I suppose all we can do is wait a few more months (until we've reached that designated 1 year to be OFFICIALLY titled infertile) go to the doctor, and then maybe the 3 of us can make a baby, because the two of us certainly can't...
Sorry for the rant, just had to let it out and needed a safe place to do that; thanks for listening! And sorry to be a bummer, I am hopeful most of the time, just not right now.

 

[hello_kitty_t]

Aww hercules, I am so sorry to hear that you are down. Don't punch me for saying this, but it takes "normal & healthy couples" up to a year to conceive. There is a possibility that absolutely nothing is wrong with either of you and you're just in that percentage who takes a little longer. I know that is easy for me to say as I have not been TTC long, but I hope it may lift your spirit a bit? That being said, it's perfectly aceptable to have times when you are just sick of it and feel like being sad. I hope the night looks up for you. *love*

 

[markswife10]

So hubby and I have been ttc for 9 months now. We have tried it all..eating better, cutting caffeine, prenatals for over a year now, temping for about a year now, even made hubby throw out undies and get new ones! Sat with legs in the air, slept with pillows under my butt. Tried bbd'ing every day, every other day. You name it, we have tried it and NOTHING!
I can safely say at this point I am OVER IT. I am starting to believe that some people just can't have kids, and we are one of those couples. I'm not saying we will never have kids, I just don't think we can have them "naturally." I'm certain if we go to the doctor (again) he can help us to have babies...So I suppose all we can do is wait a few more months (until we've reached that designated 1 year to be OFFICIALLY titled infertile) go to the doctor, and then maybe the 3 of us can make a baby, because the two of us certainly can't...
Sorry for the rant, just had to let it out and needed a safe place to do that; thanks for listening! And sorry to be a bummer, I am hopeful most of the time, just not right now.

I totally understand and feel the same way sometimes! Your story sounds almost exactly like ours (except for making DH throw out undies, he already wore boxers). It is getting old going month after month after month of trying and nothing is working. We've tried variations of BD, we've tried mucinex, drinking tons of water, Preseed, sticking my tush in the air for half an hour after sex, sleeping without cleaning up after sex... we even tried egg whites. NOTHING has worked. It's depressing, it really is!

 

[hopingforit]

It takes a normal healthy couple up to 12 months to conceive. Don't think that you can't have a child naturally. I know how you feel. It is horrible month after month not having success and thinking that something is wrong but don't think that you can't have kids. Even if you do have to go to the Dr, it might not be some huge thing that you are incapable of having a baby naturally. It could just be that some of your hormones are slightly out of whack and they can do an easy fix. I really hope that you don't get to the point that you have to go to a Dr for this. Hopefully you get your BFP soon. Please just don't lost hope. There is always hope and even though I know it is soooo frustrating, you are strong and you can get through this. You will be so happy to hold that little baby in your arms and you will cherish it so much because you worked hard to get it. I'm sending lots of your way...and hugs

Don't give up. It will happen.

 

[LuluSS]

I don't want to be a downer, but my endocrinologist told me that it takes normal healthy couples about 3 months to conceive. He said he starts referring people to the infertility department from 6-9 months. Sorry you are feeling down. I know how that is. I am on my 8th cycle and got diagnosed with PCOS. Just starting the infertility tests, etc. now. Go to the OBGYN now, and tell them your concerns. Since you have been doing everything you can (temping, etc.) they should start running tests now.

Good luck.

 

[LuluSS]

Also, nothing will work, if you have a fertility problem, such as anovulatory cycles, etc. Don't give up hope! See your doctor!

 

[hopingforit]

I don't want to be a downer, but my endocrinologist told me that it takes normal healthy couples about 3 months to conceive. He said he starts referring people to the infertility department from 6-9 months. Sorry you are feeling down. I know how that is. I am on my 8th cycle and got diagnosed with PCOS. Just starting the infertility tests, etc. now. Go to the OBGYN now, and tell them your concerns. Since you have been doing everything you can (temping, etc.) they should start running tests now.

Good luck.

Are you older than 35? Usually the only way a doctor will refer to the infertility department after 6 months is if you are over 35 or have a history of infertility. It takes a healthy couple with no fertility problems up to 12 months to get pregnant. I'm not trying to put what you are saying down. It's just that what your endo told you may be how he does it but most Drs won't even begin fertility testing until 12 months.

 

[LuluSS]

Well, sorry, but I am going by what my doctor said. I know different doctor's have different opinions. Why torture yourself and wait 12-18 months to get treatment, when you could get a second opinion, or go to a different doctor.

 

[LuluSS]

Also, I don't feel as if you are putting me down

That is why we have this forum, so we can share different stories and opinions. Because unfortunately, many women have to share their TTC journey with doctors, and all doctors have different opinions.

 

[hopingforit]

Also, I don't feel as if you are putting me down

That is why we have this forum, so we can share different stories and opinions. Because unfortunately, many women have to share their TTC journey with doctors, and all doctors have different opinions.

That's definitely true. I do wish I was as fortunate as you to have a doctor that will see you that early. My RE thinks I might have a progesterone deficiency and if that is the case, I could have resolved this issue a lot sooner. You are quite lucky to have a doctor like that. I've been to 3 Drs and the first 2 sort of blew me off because the first was at 6 months but the 2nd was at 12 months. I think that all Drs should at least do some basic hormone tests as early as possible to see if there is an easy fix and not to put women through unnecessary worry.

 

[LuluSS]

Also, I don't feel as if you are putting me down

That is why we have this forum, so we can share different stories and opinions. Because unfortunately, many women have to share their TTC journey with doctors, and all doctors have different opinions.

That's definitely true. I do wish I was as fortunate as you to have a doctor that will see you that early. My RE thinks I might have a progesterone deficiency and if that is the case, I could have resolved this issue a lot sooner. You are quite lucky to have a doctor like that. I've been to 3 Drs and the first 2 sort of blew me off because the first was at 6 months but the 2nd was at 12 months. I think that all Drs should at least do some basic hormone tests as early as possible to see if there is an easy fix and not to put women through unnecessary worry.

I am not in the clear to see the FS yet. I have to get "approved" first. The infertility coordinator at Kaiser wants DH to get his SA done. Then she is going to review everything and submit it to the off-site fertility clinic. Then they will approve it or not.

I think doctors should do basic hormone tests for women at around 6 months TTC. Then if something is off (like with me) then it is obvious that they will have troubles conceiving.

I had a pretty bad experience. I went to the doctor initially for extremely painful periods (this was just last month). She said I probably have endometriosis and ordered blood work and an ultrasound to rule out anything else. That is when she found out my hormones were off. She called me and said your testosterone level is really high and it will make it hard for you to get pregnant! Well that made me cry.

I got referred to the endo who then ran more blood work and then diagnosed me with PCOS and told me to see the FS.

I never got my painful periods issue resolved....

 

[jessandaj]

Im so sorry you feel like this, to be honest im starting to also but does your husband take vitamins everyday ? or a zinc pill? my husband just started to so im hoping it help since zinc is very important for a mans sperm production and we just found out my husband is dehydrated so were hoping that its why i havint got pregnant yet maybe you can try that good luck and lots of babydust

 

[hopingforit]

Also, I don't feel as if you are putting me down

That is why we have this forum, so we can share different stories and opinions. Because unfortunately, many women have to share their TTC journey with doctors, and all doctors have different opinions.

That's definitely true. I do wish I was as fortunate as you to have a doctor that will see you that early. My RE thinks I might have a progesterone deficiency and if that is the case, I could have resolved this issue a lot sooner. You are quite lucky to have a doctor like that. I've been to 3 Drs and the first 2 sort of blew me off because the first was at 6 months but the 2nd was at 12 months. I think that all Drs should at least do some basic hormone tests as early as possible to see if there is an easy fix and not to put women through unnecessary worry.

I am not in the clear to see the FS yet. I have to get "approved" first. The infertility coordinator at Kaiser wants DH to get his SA done. Then she is going to review everything and submit it to the off-site fertility clinic. Then they will approve it or not.

I think doctors should do basic hormone tests for women at around 6 months TTC. Then if something is off (like with me) then it is obvious that they will have troubles conceiving.

I had a pretty bad experience. I went to the doctor initially for extremely painful periods (this was just last month). She said I probably have endometriosis and ordered blood work and an ultrasound to rule out anything else. That is when she found out my hormones were off. She called me and said your testosterone level is really high and it will make it hard for you to get pregnant! Well that made me cry.

I got referred to the endo who then ran more blood work and then diagnosed me with PCOS and told me to see the FS.

I never got my painful periods issue resolved....

Hopefully you get approved soon! It's a good thing that they could find this out sooner than later though. This way they can get you started on some form of treatment. They have all sorts of fertility meds out there to help. I really hope you get this all figured out and get your BFP soon.

I actually had some spotting which was completely unusual for me at 6 months TTC. I went to the Dr and she didn't do any tests whatsoever. She just told me I might have a cyst and sent me on my way. Then it happened 4 more times over the next 10 months. My Dr said this sounds like a progesterone deficiency. I should have been tested for it before but wasn't. Hopefully eventually they change their policies to at least do the little bit of hormone testing earlier.

I'm sending lots of your way. Hopefully you get things figured out soon.

 

[LuluSS]

That is horrible that they just ignored it! I would have gotten a different opinion. Because like you said, different doctors have different protocols.

Have you since gotten any testing done?

 

[hopingforit]

That is horrible that they just ignored it! I would have gotten a different opinion. Because like you said, different doctors have different protocols.

Have you since gotten any testing done?

I was about to in October but my husband was in the process of changing jobs. Our new insurance started the beginning of this month and luckily I don't need a referral so the regular ob/gyn got me in right away with a FS. I just saw him for the first time yesterday and he has some blood tests for me to do and an SA for the hubby. I just ovulated this month so if AF starts, he will send me for an HSG in March. He realizes how hard it is to wait so he is getting everything done as quickly as possible. I really appreciate that.

 

[Mrs.326]

So hubby and I have been ttc for 9 months now. We have tried it all..eating better, cutting caffeine, prenatals for over a year now, temping for about a year now, even made hubby throw out undies and get new ones! Sat with legs in the air, slept with pillows under my butt. Tried bbd'ing every day, every other day. You name it, we have tried it and NOTHING!
I can safely say at this point I am OVER IT. I am starting to believe that some people just can't have kids, and we are one of those couples. I'm not saying we will never have kids, I just don't think we can have them "naturally." I'm certain if we go to the doctor (again) he can help us to have babies...So I suppose all we can do is wait a few more months (until we've reached that designated 1 year to be OFFICIALLY titled infertile) go to the doctor, and then maybe the 3 of us can make a baby, because the two of us certainly can't...
Sorry for the rant, just had to let it out and needed a safe place to do that; thanks for listening! And sorry to be a bummer, I am hopeful most of the time, just not right now.

Hercules, I know how you feel. Unfortunately this is not an easy process and we all have obstacles to overcome. We've been TTC since September and I was diagnosed with PCOS in January. My first cycle of clomid didn't work (in fact, my progesterone levels on clomid were significantly lower than they were without clomid). I feel like we've hit a wall, but DH and the awesome support of the ladies on this site have helped me to stay positive. I hope you're able to find something that works for you, or at least get the answers you need from your OBGYN so you know what steps need to be taken to get pregnant. GL to you!

 

[LuluSS]

That is horrible that they just ignored it! I would have gotten a different opinion. Because like you said, different doctors have different protocols.

Have you since gotten any testing done?

I was about to in October but my husband was in the process of changing jobs. Our new insurance started the beginning of this month and luckily I don't need a referral so the regular ob/gyn got me in right away with a FS. I just saw him for the first time yesterday and he has some blood tests for me to do and an SA for the hubby. I just ovulated this month so if AF starts, he will send me for an HSG in March. He realizes how hard it is to wait so he is getting everything done as quickly as possible. I really appreciate that.

Well I am glad that you got in to the FS! Good luck!!!

 

[hercules]

Thanks for the support everyone! It really did lift my spirits to see so many replies. I am trying to stay hopeful, but it just gets exhausted. To answer some people's questions:
I went to the doctor a few months ago and got an ultrasound and blood work, everything came back normal. Hubby went for an SA this past year, and one a year ago. He has above average count, but some "abnormal clumping" which could indicate sperm antibodies. He went to a urologist and they recommended further testing, but insurance doesn't cover it and it's about $800 so we aren't really prepared to spend the money just yet. We definitely will if it comes to that, but we were hoping to be able to do this on our own.
Hubby does take vitamins, and has been for a while. I don't believe he takes zinc, and I could ask him to do so. I know I have asked him to increase his water intake so he wouldn't be dehydrated.
Thank you all for your kind words and advice. I'm pretty sure we are doing everything that we can do and the rest is out of our hands. That is okay. Just frustrated. But seriously thank you all again for your support..it did make me feel a bit better today