a little OT

[LittleBoSheep]

but does anyone's husband constantly correct them, even on minor little things?
It seems like I can't get through an entire conversation without something being said.

most recent example:
"hey I am so glad I lowered his crib today as there was a spider in it just waiting to bite him"

"was it big?"

"no, it seemed to be a baby wolf spider... their bites are extremely painful"

"but they're not poisonous"

"they can be poisonous to people who have allergic reactions to them"

then he goes off on a tirade about how that is not "poisonous" etc etc
ugh it just makes me want to curl up in a ball and die

so I cut him off and tell him i really don't care because i didnt want to start a fight right before bed and me and lo go to the couch so i can fix his blanket and from the other room he yells at me to ask me what time it is which made me mad i hate being yelled at! so i yelled back at him gah why cant i control myself!? but anyways he said he is packing his bags tomorrow.
just so tired of these little petty things being blown out of proportion.


but anyways thanks for listening. don't get me wrong i love my husband but dear lord I don't care about the specifics and i definitely dont care to be treated like i am stupid.

 

[MiniKiwi]

Aww he's not serious about packing his bags, is he? I kinda get what you mean about that but tbh it's me who is like that, not OH! I get sidetracked so easily, often forget what I was even talking about or how I got to be talking about such random shit all the time. I don't do it argumentatively though, I can see how that'd be especially annoying! I constantly correct my OH English isn't his first language though and he appreciates it, as far as I know haha.

If you look back at the conversation you wrote, can you not just end it where he says ''they're not poisonous though''? Maybe you can just answer in your head, to avoid conversations snowballing into pointless arguments. I'm not implying it's your fault in any way, just that if you're aware of it, you can prevent it from getting out of control and becoming a fight for no reason.

When he yells at you, just tell him, ''don't yell it at me''. He can't argue with that! Idk if that's any help but yeah, if I were you, I'd make myself aware of how I could change the situation and start on that

 

[Akinesia]

"but they're not poisonous"

"they can be poisonous to people who have allergic reactions to them"

In this one example, you corrected him first. Even though it's correct, perhaps it wasn't necessary to say. It might make him feel as though you're shooting down his input completely. I'm not sure if this is typical of the situations you are referring to, but if it is it could be possible that your OH is feeling the same way that you are and is frustrated and arguing back as a result.

 

[LittleBoSheep]

thanks for the advice, I just didn't want him to dismiss the spider like it was okay to be going around biting LO just because it wasn't "poisonous".
he didn't seem serious about leaving as he woke up this morning and gave me a kiss... so I dunno I just wish I could talk to him without him constantly challenging me.

If I say "I wish LO wouldn't flip while I am trying to change him because it hurts my wrists"
he'll say " my wrists hurt worse than yours" and almost everytime I say anything "well I work all day and mine is worse" sigh.

 

[LittleBoSheep]

Ive tried talking to him about it but he turns it around on me and make ME apologize... so I just give up.

 

[Eternal]

Oh and I can be like that, it's annoying isn't it? I tend to remind him how he is turning into his dad and that stops him lol.