A little suggestion for all those LTTTC #1 that need to retain their sanity!

[Feisty Fidget]

Hello my lovelies

Well I joined a wonderful website called cutoutandkeep a few days ago and I saw a lovely project called a 365 reasons. Basically a wonderful lady came up with the idea of filling a jar with 365 pieces of paper each with a reason why she loved her guy The filled jar would then be given to him and each day he could take a piece of paper out of the jar and read a reason.

Now that sure is sweet but I know that if I tried giving that to DH he would firstly look at me like I had gone crazy, recover and then smile, stick the jar on a shelf and probably only open it once a month

Anyway it got me thinking about how I could make the whole concept fit to me and of course infertility was right at the front of my mind. So I figured that if I took a jar and filled it with 365 reasons as to why I am glad I am childless it may help me get through.

Now obviously I really want a child so trying to think of any reasons was quite difficult but once I got going I actually found quite a few! They aren't all major, most are simple things like;



Today may not be my day but I am glad because I can sleep as late as I like

Today may not be my day but I am glad because I can take a nap whenever I want

Today may not be my day but I am glad because my body belongs only to me

I know for a fact that picking a random one out each morning and reading it is really going to help me keep that PMA

For those of you that would like to make one of your own I will supply a link to my adapted version once the tutorial has been approved by the host site and for those that just want to be nosey at my jar here it is

https://i764.photobucket.com/albums/xx289/FEISTYFIDGET/Crafts/DSCF1552.jpg

As you can see I decorated with butterflies as they symbolise re-birth and fertility!

 

[futurephotos]

Nice idea!

 

[SLH]

I should make 365 reasons why I would want a child. I can't think of any reason why I like not having kids.

That's a great idea though. Thank you. I think I might have to make one for my husband.

 

[Feisty Fidget]

How long have you been trying for SLH?

I can't talk for all us LTTTCers but I would say that most of us have to cling to focusing on the 'negative' side to having a child to get through the fact that we can't seem to have children naturally.

There is a huge difference in the mind set of those just TTC but impatient for their and those that have been trying for such a long time that they are losing hope of ever getting there. Small things like this help us from going completely insane!

 

[tonibzac]

Lovely idea that I'm sure many can adapt to suit themselves

I might do something like 365 things I will do if I don't get my BFP then pull one out each day and do it, replacing it with a new idea

Things like sleep in until 10am, eat smelly cheese, have a hot bath, paint my toes etc

Will help me focus on things I can do now and get them out the way ready for my BFP

 

[cooch]

Or 365 reasons why I will get my healthy baby this year. Depending on how you read it- I need to send the clear affirming message to the 'universe' that I will have a healthy baby. x

 

[Feisty Fidget]

Both wonderful suggestions!

Toni many of mine are quite like that Today's random one was having more time to do things I like, like knitting So have spent an hour and a half starting a really cute knitting project. There is no way I would be able to do that with a baby, of course I would prefer the baby but I too am trying to make the most of my time before we get a sticky bean x

 

[SLH]

I haven't been ttc for too long, but it has been long enough lol. 2 years of ntnp and 1 year of ttc.

What a great idea for coping. I think it might make me depressed to think of good reasons why I don't have kids because I desperately want them. It's a great idea though and who knows it might help me in the future after trying for longer. Thanks for the idea.

 

[MrsPete]

I think it sounds like a great coping method; thank you for sharing!

My counselor once gave me a project called a "Gratitude Journal". It was about thinking of something positive each day. I learned that positive thinking is like a muscle, it needs to be exercised frequently to work well. Since I can't have a baby right now, I should learn to appreciate my current life instead of spending all my time pining for something that may or may not happen for me. I have no doubt I will continue trying all methods available to get pregnant; but what if I never can? I don't want to be bitter and unable to enjoy life. My husband and I have a wonderful life and it's important for me to remember that.

 

[Feisty Fidget]

MrsPete you have summed it all up much more eloquently then I could have done
I hope to be a Mummy but if whatever reason I can't I don't want to realise 10 years down the line that I have wasted some of the best years of my life being bitter and putting everything on hold for that elusive

 

[StorkStalker]

Feisty Fidget I loved the idea!! Sometimes I really need to stop my self from my downward spiral and think of things I´ve done that I couldn´t have done with babies... Like, the week between the holidays we went to the Louvre Museum (3hrs from here) and just spent the whole day there, it was crowded, and we couldn´t even stop for eating.. And I was paying attention to the parents pushing a stroller and/or carrying babyjorns and they looked mostly annoyed.. I mean, if I had my baby I would gladly skip going to museums... but at least that day and there we seemed to have the advantage of walking freely and not changing nappies in a crowded museum bathroom.. I enjoyed the museum and the feeling of freedom for that day... Every little bit helps.. It´s been so long that we deserve any good feeling we can get, right?? Anyways I hope 2012 is our year..

 

[cooch]

Storkstalker- that sounded great. We will so appreciate our babies, I'm so ready to fore go many trips etc for my darlings x

 

[Feisty Fidget]

That's the spirit Stork