A long vent but I can't help it

[October2013]

Just had to share this, while we are on the topic of our men not understanding....

My bf, as sweet as he is, is so clueless sometimes.
He asked me today if there was anything I needed from the store before he went to work. I gave out a short list, mostly liquids, but couldn't think of anything ''meal" wise to eat later.
He then suggested I could always just walk to the store later, if I wanted....
Now normally, this wouldn't be so insane. The store is only down the mountain and right across the street. But given that I've been telling him for 3 weeks now that I can barely walk from the bed to the bathroom because of how sick I feel, walking down the mountain, across 4 lanes of traffic to the store, and then back up the mountain to the house would be nearly impossible right now!
Sometimes I don't think he's been listening to what I've been saying at all!

 

[iluvmyfamily]

I really do think they are clueless. I don't think they understand just how bad ms can feel. I guess maybe to them they think it's just a little bit of nausea. But I always tell DH "when you get a migraine you wanna die. Imagine being sick all the time? A migraine stops within 30 mins. MS can last for weeks." Even when I think I've gotten through to him, the next day it's still the same.

With all that being said, DH has been taking care of me. Making me food, opening the windows for me because he knows I like fresh air and brightness whether I'm sick or not, he told his boss he's gonna be home for a while to be with me. I mean, I guess men can only understand to a certain extent and the rest becomes jibberjabber to them. But I agree with you about your OH, that's pretty much common sense. If you're so sick you can barely make it to the bathroom, I doubt you'd be able to walk to the store!!

I think you should really have a talk with him about everything and try to get him to put himself in your situation. HUGS

 

[October2013]

I'm glad yours was able to get time off work to help out. That must be a weight off your shoulders. Maybe you can relax some and start feeling better.

Mine is 99% of the time so very helpful. He's always getting me food, taking care of the dogs, and trying to reassure me that the cramps and nausea are normal from what the doctor says. It's just that 1% of the time where he forgets, I guess, and suggests things like walking to the store or excersizing in order to feel better.

 

[iluvmyfamily]

Lol, yea I don't think men will ever get it. Not just men, but even women who have never experienced pregnancy, or sorry, never even experienced ms. I mean, it's not just like regular nausea. It's like.....100x worse than being seasick, or having a hangover. And it just feels constant. I'll admit I'm happy I'm not going through Hyperemesis again but even still this is rough. I mean, when you can't get out of bed for one full week, it feels like it's just not worth it, even though you know deep down it ends and it IS worth it, but at the time you're struggling, you really don't see it that way.

 

[October2013]

I think the worst part is when you get a break from the ms and you're like "omg, something is wrong because I'm NOT sick..." I mean I can't even enjoy an hour of not being sick because I get scared when it disappears, esp when the disappearance is accompanied by bad cramps.

 

[iluvmyfamily]

See, I don't get nervous and maybe it's because I've been pregnant so many times and I know it's normal for ms to end out of nowhere. Like some just wake up and boom, it's gone. So to me it's pretty much normal but for someone like you who is new to pregnancy, it's definitely worrying. In my first pregnancy though when the ms stopped I didn't worry at all about the baby! I only worried at 4 months when I got used to feeling little flutters but then it stopped. I thought the baby passed away inside me. I just remember hearing my mom say " you went through so much just for this to happen?"...I knew she didn't mean it in a bad way but the way it came out sounded so wrong. Ah, looking back at my pregnancies, I don't know how I have all the kids I do!! lol

Oh! Just wanted to add, in all my pregnancies around 4 months the flutters would stop. I always thought something bad happened but the docs told me the baby just gets quiet around that time. Then at 5 months is when the kicks begin!!

 

[October2013]

Aw I can't wait to get to that point.

 

[iluvmyfamily]

It will be here before you know it

 

[PetiteMoi]

I'm glad you had a good talk with your husband and that he's understanding, and also that he seems to have an understanding boss

My DH is supportive and understanding to a certain extent. I know what you mean that they will never be able to completely understand. And they will forget quickly. The other night after we came home from a christening party and I felt so sick, I ate some yoghurt as I need to eat little and often to keep it at bay, and he blurt out: "Are you still hungry after all that food?!" He had obviously completely forgotten about my current state, and hadn't noticed me picking at the food at the party!

Also he keeps saying he "can't wait for the second trimester to start". Doh?! I am actually quite enjoying it?! He finds it hard to be sympathic, and it bothers him that he has to take more responsibility at home as well as working hard, which I guess I can understand - but he should just be soooo grateful he's not feeling ill.

 

[October2013]

I wish they could trade places with us for a couple days...

 

[PetiteMoi]

I wish they could trade places with us for a couple days...

Yes that would be so helpful, they'd be able to understand a lot better!