A story of loss 60 years ago

[collie_crazy]

I woke up early this morning and couldn't get back to sleep -- for some reason I had an urge to go the cemetery. I was literally there for them opening the gates. I sat by Emily for a while and tidied her things whilst talking to her. I then decided to take a walk around as I was crying a bit (and had an accident the last time I decided to drive straight away whilst crying) - I walked away up to the back of the cemetery next to the very old graves when I heard someone sobbing - I looked over and seen a little old lady kneeling on the wet grass by a large stone next to the trees. It wasnt a grave but from far away looked like a statue. She sounded very upset so as I walked by I stopped and asked her if she was ok.

We ended up chatting for a while and I took her round to see Emilys grave. Her name is Elsie and she lost her twins at 26 weeks, 60 years ago. She is 84 and told me she doesnt know where her babies are buried but her friend told her about the baby section of the cemetery near to her and so she visits every year on their birthday to leave them a single white rose each (she was never told if they were boys or girls, she never got to see them or hold them or find out what happened to them).

She told me she had never actually managed to find the baby graves at the cemetery (she was looking in the wrong part) but had found this marker amongst the trees and has used it ever since as 'her place'. I think its beautiful I'm sure you'll agree

Such a sad story

RIP little babies, I hope you are looking down on your mummy and know how much she loves you

 

[babylou]

It sounds like you were almost meant to meet and offer comfort to each other.

Hope you are feeling a bit better now xxx

 

[yazoo]

OMG that is absolutely heartbreaking. I am so glad times have changed and women are given the option of seeing their babies, holding them, kissing them etc compared to years ago were babies were snatched away and it was a dirty little secret. (This happened to my MIL also) I am glad that lady now has somewhere to go. I'm glad you were there for her and she was given the chance to talk about it.

Hope your ok. xxx

 

[amotherslove]

thats incredibly sad.. for her to still be hurting so much after so long.. my heart goes out to you both

 

[DueSeptember]

Awwww That sounds kind of weird....How come she couldnt Hold her Babies Sounds like a LifeTime Movie so sad...She doesnt have any Closure...

 

[luckybreak]

You never really forget ever! poor mama, I am so glad mothers have a chance to hold and kiss their little ones, I am sure her babies are there every time she visits. thanks for sharing your story and i am sorry for your loss also

 

[Vickieh1981]

Awwww That sounds kind of weird....How come she couldnt Hold her Babies Sounds like a LifeTime Movie so sad...She doesnt have any Closure...

It wasn't how things were done then. Babies were wrapped up in the sheet and taken away never to be spoken of again.

I am forever thankful that I lost Isabella in the time that I did. That she was treated with dignity, brought to me in a beautiful basket with a warm blanket and we were given as much time as we wanted to make memories. xxx

 

[MummyStobe]

Such a sad story. I'm glad that lady now has somewhere to go and was able to talk to you Amanda. She is also proof that all of our little angels will never be forgotten.

Fly high angel babies xxx

 

[angel jayvian]

Wow so sad :'( ...this pain is forever !!!!!

 

[Vickieh1981]

Wow so sad :'( ...this pain is forever !!!!!

Woah isn't that a depressing thought. That as long as we live we will live with the pain of missing our babies.

I guess that answers the question in my other post about this being as good as it gets

 

[Nikki_d72]

Oh that is so heartbraking, that poor lady. We are all very unlucky to have lost our precious babies, but lucky that it happened in this era and were not treated like that and neither were our little darlings. It is a depressing thought that we will carry this grief for as long as we live but maybe with the help and support we get nowadays it wont be as bad as it has been for this poor lady.

I also think you were meant to meet, Amanda, so you could help her. I'm glad she had found somewhere to call her place for her babies.

Hope you are feeling better today xxx

 

[Andypanda6570]

Wow so sad :'( ...this pain is forever !!!!!

That is the first thing I thought when reading this..60 years.....OMG I just knew it would be till the day i die, I knew it
That poor woman I can't even imagine her not being able to see her babies , her heart is for sure broken. it does make me appreciate all the time I got to be with Ava
I am so glad you met her, Amanda.. I pray her babies will let her know how much they love her and are waiting for her. A sad but beautiful story , thanks for sharing it with us.

 

[jojo23]

awe i just cried my eyes out reading this hun!!! RIP to those little angels...a mum never forgets! xxxxxxxxxxxxx

 

[collie_crazy]

Wow so sad :'( ...this pain is forever !!!!!

Woah isn't that a depressing thought. That as long as we live we will live with the pain of missing our babies.

I guess that answers the question in my other post about this being as good as it gets

I think thats what really struck me about it. At first when I was talking to her I was more concerned for her and making sure she was ok. It wasn't till afterwards once I was back home and wrote about it in here that it hit me like a tonne of bricks - this pain is forever

I do hope like Nikki said, however, that because we have the chance to have the love and support and did get to say goodbye that the grief will be a little easier on us. Imagine not even knowing the sex of your children They were just taken away and 'disposed' of as though they were nothing. This poor lady had to have a hysterectomy after delivering her twins and so has never had her own earth children. I hope one day her little family will get to be together.

I'm sorry if I upset anyone by sharing her story - I just thought it showed how strong a mothers love for her angels is - 60 years and still loving, still hurting, still wanting her babies

 

[katie21188]

that is so heartbreaking i'm glad u could comfort each other, sounds like she really needed to talk to someone

 

[KamIAm]

Wow!

Just read this and have chills down my arms...

You was definately suppose to meet her, what a blessing you was to her as well as she was probably to you....

Thank you for sharing this with us... So beautiful!

Our babies are Forever Loved, Never Forgotten

 

[blav]

My mom knows a woman who is in her 70s. She lost a baby later in pregnancy and was so distraught that doctors medicated her for 3 days. The baby was buried when they finally let her "wake up". To this day she is devastated by her loss. Makes me so thankful that we got to spend what time we did with our sweet angel.

 

[Khadijah-x]

Thats sooooo sad xxx
What a lovely story...xx

My grandma lost her son at 40 weeks, 40 years ago, she dosnt know where he's buried and was told to 'go home now nothing here for you' :/

 

[gnomette]

i have just seen this it was written such a long time ago such a sad story x
did you ever see her again x

 

[collie_crazy]

No I have never seen her agaIn but think of her often...