Advice please

[CaptainMummy]

My girls go to their dads on a Saturday. Neither me or their dad was drives. He gets the train to my town and i take the girls to the station to meet him for the 9am train. The journey takes about 50 minutes, which includes a 5-10 minute wait between two trains as there is no longer a direct train.
I pick them up and we get the 4.15pm train home (he brings them to the station at his side and they come back with me. We get to our home town at 5.05pm.

anyway, I feel it is too much for them. They spend almost 2hrs travelling in one day (part of which is waiting at a train station with no indoor facilities, so when it rains, there is no shelter) for about 5 hours with him. The train home is always full (stop before his town is Glasgow central, so always very busy) and the girls always have to either stand or sit on the floor.

It is getting colder, and I feel so bad that they have to do this. The trains are going to get so so busy in the run up to Christmas, and I don't know how I wil manage to squeeze myself with youngest in a buggy, my 5yr old andmy 3yr old who needs help getting on and off (big gaps between platform and train) into a train full to the brim with xmas shoppers!

He wont keep them overnight. He says he has no space. I suggested a ready bed, but he ignored me. He conplains that he doesn't see the girls enough, so you would think he would keep them once a week, but no.

What should I do?

 

[baileybubs]

Hmmm that's a tough one Hun. Why can't your ex just spend time with them where you live instead of them having to go there every week? Maybe suggest alternating it with him to start and explain your worries about it being too much. If he wants to see his kids he should be willing to make the effort and do what's best for them, not what's most convienient for him. As for not having them stay over that's a silly response, you can get those little fold up beds and carry cots and they could sleep in his living room and he'd get to spend more time with them too.

 

[.Mrs.B.]

The best option would be for him to have them overnight, if he doesn't agree to this then I would suggest him seeing them in your area, 5 hours does not seem worth the hassle.

Would it help for you to do the trip there and him to do the trip back? Or different train times so that it's less crowded?

 

[Tropiclands]

You obviously need to consider your kids and how this may effect them long term. The amount of travel just alone can have a detrimental effect on them. It sounds like you may need to tell him that your kids and you cannot travel the train.