Alone with a new baby

[emilyp83]

How do you cope? I have a 9 week old baby and I'm shattered, emotionally drained and not sure how much longer I can keep on looking like I'm coping on the outside when I'm paddling like mad and barely keeping my head above water really.

Does anyone have any tips for coping with it all on your own? It just seems relentless.

 

[shiawase]

have you got family nearby that can help? i was on my own for the first 2/3 months and it was so hard i was so tired that i dont have much memory of the those few months! all i know is i left all the housework apart from laundry, washing up and of course bottles, i went out once a week to get supplies/fresh air so i could spend the rest of my time sleeping when liam did i was still exhausted but it helped a bit. if your really struggling dont keep it to yourself people will be happy to help you if you ask, and it gets easier hun it really does!

 

[SonyaKain17]

Keep your family and friends by you as much as you possibly can.
It's hard on your own, and when you have a new baby it's even harder.
Make sure you have the support of the people who love you, and let them know how your feeling, they will be able to help.

My daughter is 3 months old and her Father and I are living apart...Have been ebery since she was 5 days old.
It gets extremely hard for me sometimes, I get so lonely at times that I feel like it's never gonna get better.
But I look at her and it takes that sting away sometimes
Keep your head up and remember you have to be strong for that baby, and everything will be alright.

 

[Mumof42009]

Few tips rest when your baby is asleep, don't matter if housework needs doing that can wait, accept any offers of help even if you are too proud to say you need help.
I was already a single mum of 3, when my little boy come along and does get easier, try get yourself into a routine it really does help x

 

[anna matronic]

Hi! Admittedly I live with my mum for the first 10 weeks, but then I moved back to my flat and have been on my own since. My family live 60 miles away so I only see them once a fortnight. I don't have anyone who can really take evan to give me a break. Evan doesn't see his dad so I don't have that option either.

Some things we do, I sleep when he does! Evan has a massive sleep in the afternoon and I also sleep during this time so get a good hour and a half maybe 2 hours nap.

My local leisure centre has a creche and I put Evan in there once or twice a week so I can go and have some me time (doing aquafit) I feel so much better! The creche is just £2.50

I try to get to bed at 10-11 as I know Evan will want feeding around 2am so I know I can get a good 2-3 hours sleep.

I have a cry at the health visitor at baby clinic, they have been VERY supportive for me luckily.

Make sure you eat. If you can batch cook some things like spag bol, chilli etc so when you have little time then you can just stick it in the micorwave!

Housework gets done when it gets done! Sometimes it gets too much but if I keep doing a little bit each day then my flat isn't a total shit hole!!

I "wear" Evan in a sling sometimes so I can get things done too and he usually falls alseep

I have very little routine yet and I think the fact I am shattered and on my own is partly the reason as getting into a routine is hard work Plus the fact we moved it buggered everything up.

But we are coping fine, I rarely have meltdowns

 

[sarahxx]

aww i was in the same kind of situation, well for the first two weeks was living with the FOB but he would just lie in bed all day so not much different, and we have split up since. it does get easier, i remember when my LO was a few weeks old and i would be up doing night feeds and trying to do everything else i used to wish that part would just be over with. Because i was so tired i didn't really get a chance to enjoy the tiny baby stage, so you really should rest when your LO does - i wish i had.
if you put a bedtime routine in place and keep night time feeds quiet and dark the baby will sleep through faster, and just try to see people when you feel up to it so that you don't feel too lonely.
it does get better
xxxx

 

[gemabee]

i've been on my own since i was 4 months pregnant nd i find organisation is the key to keepin my sanity, when finn was the same age as ur lo i started gettin him into a routine. persevere with a routine nd u don't need to be mean to do it. now he goes to bed at half 8 nd sleeps until half 7 (most nights). if he cries i go straight to him nd calm him / put his dummy in, but i never pick him up. same if i'm busy durin the day, if he's in his chair / on his mat nd starts cryin... i go straight to him nd calm him but don't pick him up unless he really needs comfortin/ is hurt/ hungry/ etc. babies learn very quick nd even tho i'm by myself i've pretty much refurbished the house i live in; i build furniture, tile, paint, drill, u name it i get it done. my house is always clean nd tidy, nd i have such an amazin, happy, nd content little boy. babies are happy in a routine, they feel safe, nd i get time to myself which makes me happy!
oh nd my life-savers include - my slowcooker (can go out for the day nd have a yummy meal to come back to) nd my halogen oven (it has a timer so if i lose track of time / end up havin a mammoth bf'ing session - nothin ever burns!).
xx