Am I A bad mother if .....

[1st_baby]

I let him cry for 10 min or less ?

Since he got sick I held him allot and comforted him ..but now that he is doing much better id like his routine to be back to normal meaning once hes fed, changed and played with he needs to nap on his own ..

Well since ive been trying to get him to nap as soon as I lay him down he whines which i dont bother with I hand him his dummy turn on his aquarium and walk out .. but now hes been so darn crabby its like hes testing my limits and frankly there non existant I have been getting sinus headaches for the past 6 days and im cranky ..

So rather then risk hurting my son in anyway I rather not go in until im calm and controlled so I let him cry for 10 min then go back dummy , pat the bum and out but i feel so bad but eh also needs to learn im not joking around when its nap time ..any tips

 

[Tilly]

No it doesn't at all, what you're doing sounds right to me. It's a matter of opinion (this controlled crying etc) but we did the same with Bethanie and her sleep routine is great. As long as you check him every 5-10 mins, gradually increasing the time you pop back each time, im sure it's fine.
You're right to leave if you're getting stressed too, as that helps no one!

 

[ryder]

your not a bad mum, it likely wont take him long to settle back into his routine.

 

[mommyof3co]

I don't think it makes you a bad mother, your trying to do what you think is best for him. I don't think you should let him cry like that though, I mean think about it, if you are upset and cry yourself to sleep what kind of sleep do you get? Probably not very good. But not only that it can actually be bad for them to cry for long periods of time...10min isn't that long, but still don't think it's very good for them. But going in there and answering his cries isnt' spoiling him or anything, it's just showing you are still there and it builds trust and a better bond. There are other ways of getting him back into a routine without having to let him cry. What we did was I would nurse my boys until they were almost asleep but not quite then put them down, if they started crying I would talk to them let them know I was still there and then leave, same again if they cried, but I did try not to pick them up unless they were really upset because sometimes they can kind of start it all over.

 

[Ratty]

There is crying and then there is really crying. If they are screaming and causing themselves to cough and splutter then I don't think its good to leave them, but if they are just crying, but are ok then its not a bad thing. My boy will do that if he gets overtired. If I pick him up or talk to him then it just keeps him awake longer and he gets more tired and is then harder to go to sleep. I let him cry a bit, if it gets out of hand I go in, give him his dummy, turn him on his side and walk out again without saying a word. He eventually goes to sleep and sleeps well.