AM only the only one that lets nap time rule the day?

[RachA]

I've found that children will adapt to your own lifestyle. I have two children and i've never been ruled by nap times. Ideally i'll always want them to nap but i won't go mad if they don't because of something going on that day. Both of mine have always got really grumpy if they haven't had a nap but i won't push it if it means i can't meet up with a friend etc.
My youngest would nap anywhere and everywhere. My youngest is a bit fussier - she much prefers her own bed but if i am out and she really needs a nap then i can usually get her to go to sleep at someones house etc.
I don't tend to arrange for friends to come and play if i know Esther will be going down for a nap - mainly because i know that if a friend is coming for 2 hours then Esther could easily sleep for the whole of that time. If i have friends coming and she is due a nap part way through their visit then i will put her to bed if i can see she is really flagging. If she isn't then i will wait until they are gone.

I also agree with the idea that it is best to get them used to going to sleep with a bit of noise going on. The worst thing i ever did with my eldest was let the house be really quiet when he was falling asleep because it meant that he would wake up at the least bit of noise. It took a long time to get him through that and even now he can't drop off to sleep at night if there is anything more than a little hum of noise - thankfully once he's asleep it does take a lot to wake him up!

 

[smokey]

I think the only reason we had a roitine was because lo excepted a routine and went along with it, once he didnt except it we adapted.
When the next one comes along its going to be a case of adapting again to see what both will go along with.
We where never overly quiete in the house, I could easily get on with hoovering and such but I woyld get annoyed wirh my mum as she knew the time id be trying to put him down or have a nap myself and would choose that time to phone or show up.
To me that wasnt about preventing houshold noise but rather a annoyance as she knew id be busy that time.

 

[Meredith2010]

We're fairly similar - both of mine have a nap from about 12.30 until 2.30/3pm and I would very rarely schedule anything to do during that time. I'm happy to do things in the morning, give them lunch somewhere and let them fall asleep on the way home and then transfer them into their beds, but I'd never schedule to do anything between 12 and 2.30pm as it just wouldn't work. They'd be exhausted and it wouldn't be fun for anyone!

It's a shame because near me there are 3 baby/toddler groups that run between 12.30 and 2.30pm which means we can never go to them. I find it such a strange time to have groups, because surely that's the time that most toddlers nap?!

I'm fine with people popping in during nap time as they are both deep sleepers and have always slept with other things going on in the house (I can hoover/have music on etc when they sleep) but it would be rare for me to change their nap time for some reason.

We're off to Devon on holiday in a couple of weeks and we're trying to work out what to do regarding naps. Either we'll do things in the morning and/or afternoon, making sure we're at the house for naps or we'll make sure we are driving between places so they can nap in the car. But generally speaking, nap time is sacred for us! I don't find it restrictive - I'm grateful for 2.5 hours every day to get things done!

 

[Noelle610]

I just want to point out that you should get your LO used to sleeping with small amounts of noise in the background from early on or it can cause problems like this. There is no need for you not to do certain things around your LO, but to adjust them to different situations. Have him sleep in different locations so that you can still go out and do things, and he can still get his nap in. I think compromising is important, but not having a social life because of nap time is quite silly - But to each's own.

Ah, I had the same thoughts before my child arrived

But seriously, much of this is down to personality rather than "getting them used to it". Some kids are perfectly happy to sleep wherever, while others are more routine-oriented and prefer their bed. There's a vide variation, just as there is with adults. Also, as children get older, sleeping a bed yields more restful, quality sleep.

When you have a child, you do compromise your social life to a certain extent. I try to be relatively flexible. If Charlie misses a nap or naps in her pack-n-play when we have something important to do, it's not the end of the world. But I certainly don't make it a regular thing. To be honest, most of my mom friends are the same so it's a non-issue, as our babies are all a similar age and nap at similar times.

 

[Palestrina]

We try to maintain a steady nap schedule in the midday. Sometimes I've had friends over at that time without it affecting LO's nap. But there have been times that we've been to social functions during the day and LO's been up. It's not ideal but it can't be helped sometimes. My niece on the other hand is ruled by naptime. She and her parents do not go to family functions like weddings and parties if they are during naptime. My LO's cousin hasn't come to his baptism, birthday parties, holiday parties all because of naptime. Ok I get it, sleeping is important for their development but I wouldn't want my LO to miss out on important functions.... besides they don't happen every day lol.

 

[lovelylaura]

Nope because we don't have set nap times only bed time. There really flexible with naps that is something I have to change though as poppy did have set nap times but she was an awful napper. When freya was born she learnt to nap with noise around her and sleeps brilliantly now. They both nap great now and it doesn't affect anything we do.

It took poppy a long time to get use to noise while sleeping. She would wake up if the neighbours flushed the toilet in the night!

I let people visit when ever but if they want a nap they get one.

 

[lozzy21]

I just want to point out that you should get your LO used to sleeping with small amounts of noise in the background from early on or it can cause problems like this. There is no need for you not to do certain things around your LO, but to adjust them to different situations. Have him sleep in different locations so that you can still go out and do things, and he can still get his nap in. I think compromising is important, but not having a social life because of nap time is quite silly - But to each's own.

Ah yes, the perfect solution...provide by someone with NO kids! I had the same idea but it didn't work. We have to respect naptime or its a nightmare. I hope your future child agrees to all your big plans!

I agree with her and I do have a child that's older than yours. Being a slave to naps is fine if your child is one of the ones that stops napping before they are two but when your 31 month old still needs 2-3 hours nap a day and you work being tied to the house on your few days off is inconvenient and impractical. There will be some children who need the ridged structure but if you can get your baby used to sleeping in a pram/carrier or in some one else's house it makes things easier in the long run if your child is like mine and still going to be needing a nap at 3.

 

[angel2010]

I just want to point out that you should get your LO used to sleeping with small amounts of noise in the background from early on or it can cause problems like this. There is no need for you not to do certain things around your LO, but to adjust them to different situations. Have him sleep in different locations so that you can still go out and do things, and he can still get his nap in. I think compromising is important, but not having a social life because of nap time is quite silly - But to each's own.

I think you will find that this is easier said than done. Not all baby's/kids will adapt so easily, if at all. Some babies (like mine) are easily stimulated and find it difficult to drop off to sleep when out and about. So most of the time, yes I do try to make sure we go out between naps and get back in time for the next one (or within the hour at least). Sometimes we do stay out longer and she does miss a nap, or catches a few minutes in the car on the way home and I don't mind this happening every once in a while but for the most part I like her to get her sleep. It's important and if she won't do it whilst out then its only fair to her that I make the extra effort to be home so she's not cranky and overtired all the time.

She won't be taking naps forever, and so its no skin off my nose. We still manage to get out but entire day trips are unrealistic for us atm. Yes it would be 'easier' if she napped whenever, wherever but it doesn't always work that way, no matter how hard you try and force it.

Yes, Carter gets very stimulated too. He rarely falls asleep in the car and only for a short time. He hasn't fallen asleep in the buggy in over a year and he has never fallen asleep on the couch.

 

[angel2010]

We're fairly similar - both of mine have a nap from about 12.30 until 2.30/3pm and I would very rarely schedule anything to do during that time. I'm happy to do things in the morning, give them lunch somewhere and let them fall asleep on the way home and then transfer them into their beds, but I'd never schedule to do anything between 12 and 2.30pm as it just wouldn't work. They'd be exhausted and it wouldn't be fun for anyone!

It's a shame because near me there are 3 baby/toddler groups that run between 12.30 and 2.30pm which means we can never go to them. I find it such a strange time to have groups, because surely that's the time that most toddlers nap?!

I'm fine with people popping in during nap time as they are both deep sleepers and have always slept with other things going on in the house (I can hoover/have music on etc when they sleep) but it would be rare for me to change their nap time for some reason.

We're off to Devon on holiday in a couple of weeks and we're trying to work out what to do regarding naps. Either we'll do things in the morning and/or afternoon, making sure we're at the house for naps or we'll make sure we are driving between places so they can nap in the car. But generally speaking, nap time is sacred for us! I don't find it restrictive - I'm grateful for 2.5 hours every day to get things done!

That does seem very silly to have play groups at that time. I am a member of a very active mommy group and lucky for us, all our events start at 10 or 103:30 so we never have to skip.

 

[angel2010]

We try to maintain a steady nap schedule in the midday. Sometimes I've had friends over at that time without it affecting LO's nap. But there have been times that we've been to social functions during the day and LO's been up. It's not ideal but it can't be helped sometimes. My niece on the other hand is ruled by naptime. She and her parents do not go to family functions like weddings and parties if they are during naptime. My LO's cousin hasn't come to his baptism, birthday parties, holiday parties all because of naptime. Ok I get it, sleeping is important for their development but I wouldn't want my LO to miss out on important functions.... besides they don't happen every day lol.

I do agree with you here though. I don't ever have to skip anything completely. We may leave a bit early, but I don't want Carter to miss out on all those important things.

 

[XJessicaX]

With DD1 up until a year she needed 2 naps a day. My life worked around these naps. She was a very routine orientated child and she only liked to sleep in her cot. Yes sometimes it was a pain in the butt but the child likes to sleep and she was a happy baby! Now she doesnt like getting up before 9am and likes a 2 hour nap around 2pm. If she doesnt nap then its no big deal, shes flexible.
DD2 sleeps pretty much anywhere although at home I am finding she prefers to be put upstairs in her room for her naps.

 

[seoj]

It obviously depends on the child as well as the parents. If your child missing their nap is going to create an over tired, cranky kid the rest of the day- then how is that good for anyone? I do feel like there are times we just have to roll with it- but overall, I try to be home during LO's nap time (as she naps better/longer in her bed). She used to be that kid that could nap anywhere! Literally, at 9mos she even napped at a fun park with loud rides and screaming kids-- It was lovely- but right around a year that slowly went away- and now, if she is distracted by anything/anyone- then she just pushes through and refuses to nap till she is so exhausted. I tried to get her to nap at my besties house recently, but with her daughter their neither girl would calm down enough to fall asleep. We gave it a go- but I ended up going home so they could both nap. Since my LO would have just been too distracted-- but if we are at home, I can take her into her room to relax her enough to fall asleep.

I wouldn't keep people from coming over during her nap time- they just need to know that when she's ready to nap, I'll be upstairs with her putting her down for a while (she tends to need a little "downtime" first, but then she'll give in and pass out)-- But if we are out and about- I try to plan my day around her nap time. We just head out early- and do our thing, then once it's close to naptime she'll pass out in the car on the way home and I can lay her down once we are home. All my friends plan kids parties etc around naps too- I figured that was just common place. It honestly irritates me when kids play places only offer toddler classes at 12-1 or around there- as you'd think they KNOW that is typically when toddlers naps. LOL.

 

[OmarsMum]

only when he was a baby, & I was miserable all the time

Other than a loose bedtime routine, I don't really let naps or relax time to mess up with our days. IF we have visitors, & he needs a nap/ a relax time, I just take him to the bedroom & let him relax there.

Even if we're going out, & I know we'll be back close to bedtime, I take his pj & tooth brush with us, I change & brush his teeth in the car, then I let him sleep in the car, & we carry him to bed when we reach. We don't stay out too long close to bedtime, but if it's time for his sleep, he will sleep in the car without an issue.

When he was younger & used to take a nap regularly, he used to nap in his pushchair or carseat.

we have a busy schedule, I cant work out or find classes, play dates, etc that always fit with his naps or relax time. We live in a busy city, traffic & heat are killing, I plan our day based on rush hours & the weather not his naps.

We also sleep out & we go to resorts at least once a month, we also travel from time to time, he learned how to be flexible, when we went on vacation last month, we were always out, & he used to get tired, but he wasn't so bothered as he slept during bus trips, airplane flights, & in his buggy without a problem.

it's what's works for you & your lifestyle, I cant cope with a rigid routine xx

 

[Palestrina]

We try to maintain a steady nap schedule in the midday. Sometimes I've had friends over at that time without it affecting LO's nap. But there have been times that we've been to social functions during the day and LO's been up. It's not ideal but it can't be helped sometimes. My niece on the other hand is ruled by naptime. She and her parents do not go to family functions like weddings and parties if they are during naptime. My LO's cousin hasn't come to his baptism, birthday parties, holiday parties all because of naptime. Ok I get it, sleeping is important for their development but I wouldn't want my LO to miss out on important functions.... besides they don't happen every day lol.

I do agree with you here though. I don't ever have to skip anything completely. We may leave a bit early, but I don't want Carter to miss out on all those important things.

And even if my son turned into a raging lunatic due to skipping a nap (which he doesn't, he's cranky but we can survive it) I am willing to chance it just so that he can be at important functions. I don't want to show him pictures later and when he asks me "where was I during these parties?" to say "you were napping."

 

[hubblybubbly]

General rule, yes I like to be home for naptime, she has one a day about 11 for about 2 hours, that gives me plenty of time to do things, meet friends etc morning and afternoon.

Obviously weddings /special events are different and I'd make an exception.

She's a terror if she hasn't napped and sleeps even worse than normal at night, can take 2-3 days to readjust and it's just not worth it.

She won't sleep anywhere other than her cot incl pram/sofas/other cots, nursery really struggle with her ( and they've had her since she was very little) she will nap in the car but only if you're on the move which isn't ideal either.

Their personalities are all different, some are more easily stimulated than others and need more structure and routine, no amount of forcing some children will work. I find some of the comments on this thread laughable, yes I hope number two is easier personality wise more relaxed, would happily sleep on someone's sofa whilst conversation and play were going on around them, but my first is not that child...and yes I tried to get her to sleep in various places, noisy situations from a newborn, but as of about 5 months she just got too nosy!

Don't worry about what people have to say or whine about with the way you do things, people will always disagree on how you parent, comments like "if you'd done this you'd have the perfect child, like mine...(or the imaginary one that I'm going to have, in the case of non-parents)" get right on my wick, until someone's been in your shoes with your lo they have no idea. Just do what's best for you and your lo!

 

[Cleo]

We are 100% dictated by our kids naps and I don't think there is anything wrong with it.

I too tried to get them used to sleeping anywhere and with background noise when they were young. F rejected this completely and would not nap if there was noise from about 7weeks on. He would wake up at the slightest disturbance or only have a short catnap in his stroller or the carseat. He did not function well with just a short nap...he was a miserable beast and that was completely unfair to him. Why on earth would I deprive him of something he desperately needed just so I could go out for a coffee or to the shops? No thanks.

L was a bit better. She was fine with a few catnaps a day and never seemed cranky with just a short nap. She'd also sleep anywhere, stroller, car, someone else's crib if we were at friends...very easy. Now that she's only having one nap a day, she needs it a bit more, so I won't skip it.

They are who they are. I don't think you can MAKE them fit your lifestyle. If they do, that's great, you're very lucky. But if they don't, I don't think it's fair to them to keep forcing them.

 

[Mum2b_Claire]

No, scarlett sleeps in the sling. Ruby slept best in her cot but it didn't stop me going out, she would just have a shorter nap in the car or pushchair.

 

[waitingfor]

I don't get out much in the afternoons because of 3 hour naps. I can't wait for her to sleep for less. We don't have rigid nap times but generally she is ready for a sleep late morning or sometimes after lunch. If I'm out for the day, she does sometimes sleep in her pram for a few minutes but generally she will not drop off in the pram or the car.

She has been used to sleeping with noise since she was tiny but has never slept easily in the car or pram; there's just too much to look at!!

Whilst some people are saying they just let their children sleep for less or miss naps, that's great if it works for you, but unfortunately not all children are the same.

If my daughter misses her naps, gets overtired or I wake her up early, she is a nightmare. She bites herself and anyone else who is nearby and bangs her head against the walls or floor. This is not fun for either of us so I'm stuck with her needing long naps for the time being

 

[KatieB]

I still like to be home for Louis' nap if possible, around midday. He's now at the age where he can sometimes skip a nap but mostly needs it. He doesn't just drop off in the buggy (stopped napping in buggy around 13 months) or anywhere else other than his cot, he likes his cot for sleep and that's that. Fine by me. DS2 will only nap in cot too.

 

[Palestrina]

I don't get out much in the afternoons because of 3 hour naps. I can't wait for her to sleep for less. We don't have rigid nap times but generally she is ready for a sleep late morning or sometimes after lunch. If I'm out for the day, she does sometimes sleep in her pram for a few minutes but generally she will not drop off in the pram or the car.

She has been used to sleeping with noise since she was tiny but has never slept easily in the car or pram; there's just too much to look at!!

Whilst some people are saying they just let their children sleep for less or miss naps, that's great if it works for you, but unfortunately not all children are the same.

If my daughter misses her naps, gets overtired or I wake her up early, she is a nightmare. She bites herself and anyone else who is nearby and bangs her head against the walls or floor. This is not fun for either of us so I'm stuck with her needing long naps for the time being

Wow 3hr naps! I wish LO would sleep longer, he never sleeps for more than 1.5hrs at most. To tell the truth I really enjoy his naptime, it gives me a chance to nap, relax, do some work, or just enjoy nice peaceful quiet time. It is a little reprieve in the midst of a toddlerful day.