Anyone doing it alone with two under one?

[xAmiixLouisex]

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[teal]

You will cope because, as you said, you have to One thing I'd maybe be careful about is FOB wanting to see one of his children and not the other. That could cause problems for your children once they're old enough to understand that their father has a favourite etc.. Sending you hugs xx

 

[Shezza84uk]

Aww Hun sending hugs, I think you would cope as mothers we just always find ways and means to make it work. Having a termination will be mentally and emotionally difficult for you especially if you feel it wasn't an obvious choice but sort of a back against the wall situation! Considering they are his children I would refuse him access to your son if he won't accept the other child!

I don't think the court would agree with him causing conflict between your children. He is using the terminate or else ultimatum as a last desperate attempt to scare you into doing what he wants when as you said going ahead wouldn't change the circumstances it would just make him happy!

Tell him piss off and live your life you will be fine xx

 

[Jade--x]

You'll cope like you say you have to..And we always manage it. I have 2 alone (I'm 21) but mine have a 2 and a half year age gap. I've always done it alone and I've coped - infact I've more than coped my children are amazing happy healthy little boys

As for him saying he'll see one and not the other..I'd tell him he sees both or he sees none. As someone else said the children will understand as they get older that he has a favourite and that's just awful! He sounds like an immature idiot to me anyway that you and your LO's are better off without x

 

[ukgirl23]

Awww hn thats awful! I know you can do it though, mothers do what needs to be done

My husband walked out when I was 3 months pregnant and left me alone with a 2 year old. It was hard at times and I regretted a lot at first but it gets easier and eventually you kinda just get on with it and get happy again.

 

[rockabillymom]

Ok basically, I went through my whole pregnancy alone. Jayden's dad turned up when he was 3 weeks old. He see's him twice a week. He's messed me around for months, just having casual sex. Of course I was stupid and naive and thought maybe it will lead to us being together and we'll have the perfect little happy family I long for. But no, He officially told me we're not going anywhere. We've had terrible arguments and he's said a lot of nasty things. So I've totally cut contact between me and him. My mom deals with everything in regards to him seeing Jayden.

I found out I was pregnant (before we fell out). I know it was silly to not use anything, I wanted the depo injection but my doctor said I had to wait for my 8 week post natal check. Then at the app he said I have to wait for my next period, well of course me being an idiot that period never arrived. Jay's dad immediately said to terminate (as usual) only this time I agreed. Tbh I knew I couldn't have a baby.. with a baby!

I really didn't want to do it. There will be only 10 months between them! But the thought of raising the two of them alone scared me less than well, you know what..

Once me and his dad fell out. I decided not to go through with it. I changed my mind 100 times. But I decided I was doing what makes him happy, not what made me. And since he'd already been seeing someone else, whether I done it or not he STILL wont commit to me, Ever. And it's a big thing to regret. Not like you could just undo it once it's done. So, I'm not sure I could live with the guilt, or regret. He has said if I chose to keep it, he'll have nothing to do with him/her. He'll see Jay on his days as he does and that's it. So yeah, whatever...

Anyway the reason for the post is..
Anyone else done it? Will I cope? I'm so scared it's unreal.. I know when it comes down to it, You HAVE to cope. It's not the case of will i or wont I. Guess I just need some reassurance...

Youll cope and learn to have a routine. Im due with my second and will have 2 under 2 alone being a single mommy.

 

[ravenmel]

My 1st is 20 months and I'm due with number 2 next Wednesday. You will cope, it just kinda kicks in, don't over think it. It is hard work being pregnant towards the end with a toddler but it's not forever and I can't wait to met baby. I wondered if I was doing the right thing as everything was falling apart as I found out I was pregnant and made it really hard to be happy and excited but after weeks of debating in my head I knew that this is my baby, It's not that I didn't want the baby but all the surrounding issues so I knew my answer. Forget him what do you want?

 

[babyoneill]

you will find a way of coping ppl always do my opinions on abortion is negative i hate it and the thought of killing my baby would kill me forever although i realise why people do it i just couldnt live with myself and i would always wonder what my baby would of been like, i got pregnant with my second child and me and her dad were goin thru a bad patch, i considered abortion and even went to the clinic but the thought of it killed me when she did a scan to see how far i was, i walked out of the clinic and didnt look back i now have a beautiful daughter age 5 and wouldnt be without her, u will make the right decision in the end sweet only u can decide x

 

[jackie2012]

when i got pregnant with my third my oldest was 9 and my second was only 8 months old it was in betweeen me and my ex fighting and trying to make it work again and he basically told me the same thing. And i said theres the door i knew that that was something i couldn't do for me personally. and he told me the same thing that he wouldn't take him as his child and blah blah blah and for probably the first few month he didn't want anything to do with my youngest but once he realized i wasn't going to let him favor one over the other he came around and accepted the fact they were both his kids.

Honestly the first year really suck as far as sleep deprivation (my kids were awful sleepers and i had to work a lot of nights also)but it was so worth it in the end id take all those sleepless nights again for the love joy and good memories they have given me and continue to give eachday. I feel very blessed to be able to their mom.

Oh wait i will be taking them again i am having twins alone lol

my point is you can't live your life to make other people happy, you need to make you happy and the only way to do that is do whats best for you and your LO.

 

[AnnabelsMummy]

oh hun, i don't have 2 under 1, but i had 2 under 2!

Although slightly different relationship with my daughters' father, he didn't really acknowledge my second daughter - when we were together or when we'd broke up, (part of the reason, i broke the relationship off - along with other things).

It's quite difficult doing it with 2 alone, but it's worth it. You will feel like you're going crazy, one minute you tell them off the next you'll be really chuffed with something they've done.

Me and my girls just have a little team, we kinda each do our thing at certain times and just get on with it, you have too. Take one day at a time - we do just fine!

Oh, and just as an aside, for me it's easier with two, than it was with my ex and 1!! says how difficult he was!

always here if you want to talk or anything - believe in yourself, you're stronger than you think you are!

 

[Pinkie88]

I am a single mom of 3 and 2 of them are under 2. It is hard but I have my ex husbands parents support. They watch the kids when I'm tired. You can do it!