Anyone else feel bullied because of your age?

[Kutiepatuie]

Lot you just explained that sooo perfectly.
I don't want people looking at my son like they're kids ate better than him because they were born to older parents.
I dont want him wondering why people look at mommy funny or why people whisper when we pass.
I font ever want him to think he is any less important or perfect than other kids.

Feeling like that really makes us really just not give a crap if people whisper.
I used to be kind of afraid of my bump. Luke if people noticed I'd be so embarrassed. But now I just do not care.
Shopping for my baby shower people looked at me like I was ridiculous and my mom was insane for throwing me a shower.
I just don't think our children deserve to be any less celebrated just because we're young.

Another thing, the longer you carry your child for and love them for, you get so defensive! Like a f*cking tiger! Lol

Lol that is so true I am already so protective! I am so happy about having my little girl and can not wait until she is here!

I have had some reassuring comments from my university professors, lots of them congratulating me ( I am extremely obviously pregnant) which is nice because school is one of the most important goals in my life and having people encourage me within that field felt so good and really lifted my spirits.

 

[teenmommy15]

i am also i wonder how protective i'll be when she gets here kutiepatuie when are you due?

 

[jozylynn896]

My mom tells me "just wait til he gets older and some one tries to mess with him you will go mental". And I imagine myself l going crazy!

 

[teenmommy15]

I know some punk trying to get with my daughter , i'll go crazy -.-

 

[Kutiepatuie]

i am also i wonder how protective i'll be when she gets here kutiepatuie when are you due?

I'm due June 1st. So close but so far away lol.

 

[Rosie604]

I'll tell you this much ladies, nothing changes. I'll be 21 this month (I know I'm in the wrong forum, sorry for snooping), the pressure to be older and have your life together never stops. My boyfriend of almost 2 years and I decided we wanted to be parents. There are a lot of people out there that think that age will determine what you can handle, and truth be told, there are so many OLDER women out there that can't handle a baby like a young energetic mom can. I'm also not saying that older women aren't great mothers. My mom had my baby brother 4 years ago and she is 42. She is an amazing mom. My boyfriend's dad told me that I was doing everything ass backwards, that I needed to be married and have an amazing job to have a baby. Having a baby is all I've ever wanted to do, no matter what he thinks of me for it. If this is what I wanted MY life to be like, no matter how difficult, it's not for anyone else to decide. My point, don't listen to them. You be the best mom you can be and teach those a**holes that they're wrong.

 

[teenmommy15]

lol im due June 18th so i know exactly what you mean!

 

[ClairAye]

I never had anyone directly say something to me for my age, but if people said anything behind my back.. I am so so so so so proud of my son and I know I'm a good mum, if anyone wants to say something about your age, let them and prove them all wrong!

 

[Cimorene]

I started dating my husband at 19... I almost wished that we had gone ahead and made a baby then...I'm 28 now with a toddler and one on the way, and I'm completely worn out Totally wishing I still had my youthful energy back !! Plus, it's harder to "bounce back" when you're older...even just 9 years or so makes a difference...or it certainly feels like it

 

[cammy]

Oh yeah! Every doctor I ever saw always asked me if I wanted my mum with me or if the could talk to my mum and I didn't even live with her. It frustrated me to hell. When I was in hospital they never told me anything, they went and told my mum who was visiting and then she wouldn't tell me or she would give the doctor an answer that wasn't my decision.

That and I was really bullied by OH's best mate. I still hold a grudge against him. He was horrid to me, but fantastic towards OH. He wanted me to get an abortion and leave OH or let him go out, party, drink and sleep around, whilst he can. But then he would tell me how he was just saying this stuff because he thought we were young and were definitely going to be neglectful drunk/drugged up parents who sleep around. WTF! I hate him with a passion.

 

[Pheonixsmummy]

I get the age critiscism more than anything in the world! I'm 15 and 19 weeks, and I can't begin to tell you all the ridiculous things that come out of peoples mouths. I also receive even more bs on top of it because I'm going to be a single mom, so it's doubly whammy. I get the eye rolls, stereotypes about how someone my age can't create a healthy baby, how not having a partner automatically means I can't parent, etc. I don't think people realize that age is just a number.

For example, this one counsellor I saw (only once because she was extremely rude) told me that because I'm 15, going to be 16, I have to give up my child for adoption because I'd give it such a horrible life and I'd just be miserable, and that if I keep it, there's no chance at all that I will be happy. And better yet, she works at a pregnancy center to help women in crisis!

 

[teenmommy15]

im 15 and 26 weeks pregnant. when are you due? and whats your name? i know how you feel alot of my teachers say stupid shit to me, like way to be professional bitch-.- but i put them in their place right away cause no ones gonna say shit about my pregnancy or my baby she's healthy and is going to have a happy healthy life are you have a boy or a girl? btw my names bethany

 

[thecurlymama]

I get the age critiscism more than anything in the world! I'm 15 and 19 weeks, and I can't begin to tell you all the ridiculous things that come out of peoples mouths. I also receive even more bs on top of it because I'm going to be a single mom, so it's doubly whammy. I get the eye rolls, stereotypes about how someone my age can't create a healthy baby, how not having a partner automatically means I can't parent, etc. I don't think people realize that age is just a number.

For example, this one counsellor I saw (only once because she was extremely rude) told me that because I'm 15, going to be 16, I have to give up my child for adoption because I'd give it such a horrible life and I'd just be miserable, and that if I keep it, there's no chance at all that I will be happy. And better yet, she works at a pregnancy center to help women in crisis!

Ah, I'm sorry ! That's not nice at all. I've experienced some of that from a teacher who was the coordinator for a teen parent program- I mentioned the situation earlier in this thread.

Judgment can be so irritating! Lately I've been experiencing more positive feedback rather than negative- thank goodness!

 

[Kutiepatuie]

I started dating my husband at 19... I almost wished that we had gone ahead and made a baby then...I'm 28 now with a toddler and one on the way, and I'm completely worn out Totally wishing I still had my youthful energy back !! Plus, it's harder to "bounce back" when you're older...even just 9 years or so makes a difference...or it certainly feels like it

That is actually one of the reasons I am happy to be having a child young. Not to mention that I am doing a graduate program and will be in school for so long so that a child would be "inconvient" until I was at least 30!

And congrats on your second!

 

[meganliz11]

hey! im 26 weeks pregnant today, ill be 16 april. i feel like people just automatically assume you go out and drink and date and go to clubs as a teen, and that now you are pregnant you won't be able to do that. I'm not the type to go out with friends or anything, i love being comfortable at home or something. My life is not ruined, i hate how older moms assume we're immature and we're just soo stupid. It's not like im trying to conceive at all. People suck!

 

[thecurlymama]

hey! im 26 weeks pregnant today, ill be 16 april. i feel like people just automatically assume you go out and drink and date and go to clubs as a teen, and that now you are pregnant you won't be able to do that. I'm not the type to go out with friends or anything, i love being comfortable at home or something. My life is not ruined, i hate how older moms assume we're immature and we're just soo stupid. It's not like im trying to conceive at all. People suck!

I agree, but even in my case I was totally the type to go out with friends I was smoking weed daily and drinking occasionally at parties and such. I was a complete social butterfly when it came to partying and being a somewhat "stereotypical wild teen", but all of that did change when I found out I was pregnant. I was smoking weed and cigarettes, and stopped the day I found out. I stay home and clean the house now, babysit all my cousins and siblings (not that I didn't do that before- but it has become my daily routine now) and I'm totally happy! I'm ready to settle down with my man and create a happy little family.

Maternal instinct can set in and create an amazing mom no matter what age you are! I don't think it matters if you're 30 or 15- there is the potential for an amazing mother . That being said- some teen moms do make mistakes and end up having sad lives that seem "ruined", but it's possible for an older "prepared" parent-to-be to end up in that position as well!

I think agism has become a huge problem in society

 

[magic93]

I completely agree with all of you!! Even though i cant say i have felt bullied because of my age at all this time around.. People can be pretty ignorant towards young mothers, and it is unfair for them to assume that because we are not 30 years old and married that we are not capable of being good mothers. No matter what the situation tho there will always be people who judge the situation your in. The most important thing is to not let it get to you. I have had many people including some family members say that because my OH is in jail, and im alone i will not be able to handle being a mom, and i think thats a load of shittt! But oh well let em talk, i work hard to provide for myself and i know i will be an amazing mother whether my boyfriend is here or not, and even tho im 19 i will be the best i can be, age has no effect on your ability to take care of your child. And those people who say your life is ruined dont know what their talking about you can still do anything you want it jus takes more work but is so worth it and your child will give you all the motivation you need.

 

[skye93]

** sorry for the crap spelling** on my phone

I don't understand what peoples problems are. Not all that long ago it was the norm to be married at 16 with babies on the way. My grandmother had my uncle at 17.

I was 18 when I concieved 19 when I had my son in January. Partner has a fulltime job owns the house abd we have 3 cars. My son def does not go without in any aspect. All I've ever wanted to do was be a mum, amd.not to toot my own horn but I think I've taken to it pretty well!

When I had mu dating scan @ 6 weeks the ultrasound man was very rude. He looked at my age then just looked at me and asked why? Said be had a daughter my age etc and.kept going.on about it the whole time.-.-.
I changed hospitals for my ultrasounds and ended up with a really nice guy doing the ultrasounds and my OB was very supportive the whole way through. All of the midwives were really great when I had him to.

I get some shocking looks while in town though some people say crap as they walk past me even.
Guess you just get over it, if anyone actually said anything directly to my face now I'd let rip.

 

[MrsKyliePaton]

I am way past my teen years now (28) had my first DD1 at 21 and never really came across any criticism until I had DD2 at 27, I still look very young for my age and I am short so people just assume I am still young, if I don't wear my wedding ring while out and have both girls with me I do notice the older generation looking at my ring finger and if they don't see a ring ill get tutted at and head shake, age doesn't matter so ignore them and know you are going to be the best person you can be x

 

[BabyBabbler]

Not quite sure if I should be here since I'm WTT, but I'll be 19 when I start TTC and just because 19 is still a teenager, or any age with 'teen' in it, mothers are mothers and age does not affect how well they can parent!

Sorry you had to deal with that