Anyone SO broody and SO ready to TTC but SO scared all at the same time?

[LunaFleur]

Hi ladies!

So FH and I are planning on TTC from February 2015, with our wedding the 31st of March 2015. We are both so excited to be ttc-he actually wanted to start sooner- but I get so nervous sometimes!
I worry that I won't know what I am doing or sometimes when I have a stressful day I wonder how I would cope if I had a baby to take care of too. Family is everything to me, and I have no doubts about having a child, but boy do I get cold feet at times lol anyone else out there have this? FH is amazing and I know he will be a great Dad, he is so patient, pulls his weight in housework and loves to cook for me, so I know those days I am tired having been up with the baby he will help all he can without being asked, but I can't help but worry, but then again I do worry about everything

 

[Leggiero]

I get what you're saying completely, Luna! I too am a professional worrywart and have tons of nagging anxieties about TTC as well, particularly how a baby will affect my relationship with my OH and, most of all, money. Childcare costs here are astronomical and so is cost of living in general. I've accepted that I will never be "100%" prepared for parenthood and I don't believe that many people really ever are...but I do second guess our decision to TTC in December purely for financial reasons, like maybe we should have more savings first. Deep down, though, I know we could make it work.

It does sound like you have a wonderfully supportive partner, and that is an incredible blessing. Talk things over with him if that will help ease your mind. But really, we'd be crazy NOT to worry about taking such a big step. I'm sure we'll be just fine.

 

[LunaFleur]

I know! I have read a few posts about people discussing this, and while it does make me a little sad that I will have to share fh I know I am being really silly lol
We have dogs and when he comes back from work it makes me so happy to see how excited they are to see him, and he always gets up before me on his days off so he can take them out for a early morning walk, I really enjoy seeing them enjoying each others company and the dogs love to lie on his lap while we are watching tv, and not once do I think, oh I wish they would leave him alone so I can have him all to myself LOL! I know it isn't quite the same thing but it is the only thing at this moment that I can compare it to, we also share housework and do things like the gardening together, and I really enjoy this time, so I figure a baby can only bring more love and joy into a home, so I shouldn't worry
But I know when you read things and some women love to say oh you have no idea what you are getting into and make out it is a chore to have a child and not a blessing I can only put it down to these people had unhealthy relationships in the first place, because yes I understand having a child changes the dynamics of your relationship and is a lot of work they are more than worthwhile.
I have had pups from my girl before, my dogs have been ill and pooped the carpet, and needed 24:7 care for weeks on end. We can't stay out overnight or for very long at a time because I refuse to leave them locked up and no I can't take a spontaneous weekend away, but my goodness I love the bones of these animals and wouldn't change my life for the world! So I can only imagine that when I have a child it will be like this times a hundred and I am fine with that
And yes you are right, at least if we worry about everything then it means if something comes up we won't be thrown off because we would already be prepared for it haha! Rather be too prepared than not enough!
Child care costs are a big dent in the wallet, but I work from home and won't have to worry about child care thank goodness! I guess like you said you will make it work, life throws us all kinds of curve balls but we get through it
We will be ttc near eachother, we should stay in touch and go through the journey together

xx

I get what you're saying completely, Luna! I too am a professional worrywart and have tons of nagging anxieties about TTC as well, particularly how a baby will affect my relationship with my OH and, most of all, money. Childcare costs here are astronomical and so is cost of living in general. I've accepted that I will never be "100%" prepared for parenthood and I don't believe that many people really ever are...but I do second guess our decision to TTC in December purely for financial reasons, like maybe we should have more savings first. Deep down, though, I know we could make it work.

It does sound like you have a wonderfully supportive partner, and that is an incredible blessing. Talk things over with him if that will help ease your mind. But really, we'd be crazy NOT to worry about taking such a big step. I'm sure we'll be just fine.

 

[callmedan]

can i just ask why you have decided to TTC before your wedding? this is something i considered but i was too worried about things like morning sickness..
not trying to be rude just curious!

 

[LunaFleur]

Trust me when I say we spent a lot of time trying to work out when exactly to ttc lol, but in the end we decided that life throws too many curve balls for you to plan everything, so we asked ourselves how we would feel if we waited until after the wedding and it takes many months for us to get a BFP, and I know I would have wished that we had started to try sooner.
I have asked before about peoples opinions on being pregnant at their wedding, but the biggest thing was not being able to drink, not being able to be dancing all night or having the energy, and to be perfectly honest those things to me are so insignificant, I am not getting married to get drunk or throw a wild party, so not being able to do those things and having an intimate dinner party style wedding suits me and fh just fine
We are going to wait and see how things are but we may even start trying from the New Year, the way I see it is, are we really prepared to not ttc for a few extra months for the sake of 4 hours at our wedding? I would much rather be a little under the weather and know it is because we have a beautiful baby on the way than not be pregnant at all!

can i just ask why you have decided to TTC before your wedding? this is something i considered but i was too worried about things like morning sickness..
not trying to be rude just curious!

 

[AngelofTroy]

I was VERY sick 6 weeks into my pregnancy, like sick 10+ times a day, I couldn't bare the smell of my kitchen to the point if someone had opened the door to the kitchen in the last 10 minutes I would know and would heave! i had to have time off work, 2 weeks in the end between 9-11 weeks. It was horrendous! I know it could take a while to conceive, but I conceived on the only night we didn't use a condom, on a date that I shouldn't even have been fertile! I can't possibly know all your circumstances but I really suggest you at least consider WTT until the wedding!

 

[tverb84]

Sometimes I feel like I want to have children but at the same time I know I'm not ready yet. I know I'll be ready one day.

 

[Sprite2011]

I was very sick from about 6 weeks too (unfortunately developed into hyperemesis uggh) so really would suggest too that you wait, I also looked like death had horrid spots and was do tired I could barely function though out the day! A few weeks is nothing and yes you may be fine, but your wedding day is so special you don't want to puke down your dress or not be able to kiss your new hubby cos his aftershave smells rank!

 

[prettybirdy27]

We are ready to have a baby - both me and DH talk about it day and night - but I have many worries too - and we're only 4 days away from our TTC date!

When we set the date, it was about three months ago, and I kept thinking to myself "That's plenty of time to get myself together." Now that it's this weekend, I keep thinking "Crap! I didn't pull myself together!" and then I calmly remind myself that there's no 100% perfect time.

I think what scares me the most is that our lives will go from me and my husband to me, my husband, and a third person who is a total stranger that I don't even know. How can you get to know someone before you even meet them?
But one of the biggest lessons I've learned in life is that you can't stop living your life just because of worries. Everything will work out.

 

[Leggiero]

I have had pups from my girl before, my dogs have been ill and pooped the carpet, and needed 24:7 care for weeks on end. We can't stay out overnight or for very long at a time because I refuse to leave them locked up and no I can't take a spontaneous weekend away, but my goodness I love the bones of these animals and wouldn't change my life for the world! So I can only imagine that when I have a child it will be like this times a hundred and I am fine with that

Agreed!! While I know it's a whole different ball game with a baby, I am already used to living without some of the "freedoms" people without children enjoy, because of my dog. Like you said, no spontaneous trips, no impromptu drinks after work, no hotels that aren't "pet-friendly"...heck I feel guilty leaving the little guy alone for two hours while we're at the movies! While he was a puppy, I was functioning on 3 hours of sleep per night for about two weeks. But I love him to bits and I don't mind trading weekend road trips for scooping poop if it means he's well-cared for. Thanks for bringing that up Luna - makes me feel a tad bit more ready!