Anyone thinking of having a second baby in a two bedroom home and uncertain?

[diggory77]

My other half and I are considering having another baby (getting pregnant sometime in 2014). There are a few things that are putting me off such as:
- living on the third floor (with 33 steps)
-only having two bedrooms
- child care costs as we are paying for our current 11 month old to be in nursery for 2.5 days a week (currently costing £524 a month! Ouch!). Luckily working tax credits help us with £200 a month
- we're looking to get on the property ladder but have £2000 more to save!

Could anyone give me their experiences or advice on how they coped with two young children in any of these circumstances! On the plus side, I am 26 years old and was hoping to have my second whilst still in my twenties and to give my other child a sibling close in age. I am very broody and would love to have another child.

Just hard to decide whether to go for it and cope or to get our house/ wait for free childcare hours when my daughter turns three/ and also the possibility of difficulties with two children sharing a small bedroom!

Advice please! What would you do?
X

 

[alicecooper]

If it's any help I have 4 kids and only 3 bedrooms. It's fine for kids to share.

 

[aliss]

The baby is with us and will just go with his brother once he hits old enough to learn to. We all lived in the same cave for so long, they'll be fine!!!

 

[Noodlebear]

I only have 1 child but me and my sister shared a room until we were 7 and 9 so I don't see it as an issue. I think that perhaps your financial worries would make me sit down and have a proper think but if you're not able to do all the things you want right now it really just depends on what you'd rather have first - a new addition to the family or to get on the property ladder.

 

[Peggy O]

We bought a two bedroom home last year when I was pregnant. I REALLY want a 2nd kid, if it's possible for us, and I think a new baby could easily share with lily till we can afford to add on. Our house has an addition off the 1st floor (large kitchen, and laundry room) and we could easily add on above it without changing the current upstairs much. If we had another baby and never added on it would not be the end of the world though. My sister and I had our own rooms as kids, but OH shared with his THREE brothers! They were fine.

 

[meli1981]

I have three kids in a two bedroom house! The girls share and i co sleep with my baby...its fine for siblings to share a room

 

[rubberducky88]

My kids will be sharing!
They're a boy an girl so have said to my OH I want a 3 bed by the time my eldest is 9 as I think by then they will need their own space (puberty impending etc)
But it's totally fine and healthy and mostly fun for kids to share a room

 

[Tor]

I have 2 boys in a 2 bedroom and youngest will just stay in with us until I can trust them both together but I think its totally fine for kids to share a room so I wouldn't let that put me off.

Cant advise on the finances though I think that's upto you which you would prefer a close age gap or your own house quicker.

 

[chezababy]

I only have one dd but I did share a room with my 2 younger sisters until I was 15. It was fun when we were little as we enjoyed playing together but we definitely needed our own rooms by the time we hit puberty. Girls need their space by that age. There is only 15 months between me and one of my sisters and having us both going through hormonal changes at the same time and with no space from each other was not fun. It actually ruined our relationship for many years (although we now get on fine. I'll be happy for my children to share until the oldest is about 10 (maybe boys will be ok together for longer? because they don't go through the same hormonal changes). I'd be more concerned about your financial situation. I generally think that where children are concerned with make whatever situation we are in work. My lo was not born when we were in the best financial situation but I'm happy to make sacrifices to make it work. Only you will know if you are happy to make any sacrifices you need to (and whether it's possible for you to make those sacrifices) or whether you would rather wait until you don't need to make so many sacrifices.

 

[Louise88]

I live in a 2 bedroomed house at the moment, it really bothered me at first but I see it as short term, my daughter and son will have to share but it's only while we save up our deposit to get a mortgage 2 years maximum then I can give them a room each decorated to suit their personality. I shared a room with my sister for 16 years I loved sharing as a child but I did want my own space when I was 13/14. So I wouldn't worry about bedrooms at this stage, I'd say go for it if you can financially afford a second

 

[catty]

I live in a similar flat to you by the sounds of it but am on the 2nd floor. Im pregnant with no.2 and not worried at all about them sharing.
Im more concerned about trying to get them both up and down the stairs on my own as I already find it a challenge with one.
Ideally id like to move by the time my youngest is 5 but more so thag we can have a garden and front door than a room each.

Whilst growing up we had a 3 bedroom house but me and my sister shared until we started school

 

[Pearls18]

I think it depends on the rest of space you have. We were in a 2 bed house and the bed rooms were a lovely size the boys would have shared fine but downstairs was soooo small it was supposedly a living room diner but really it was the size of a normal living room, thankfully we got moved into a 3 bed house when I fell pregnant because we are in military housing and our entitlement changed. I wouldn't have been happy having 2 children in that house just because it would have been so cramped downstairs, but even though we have a 3 bed house now I will still get the boys to share at some point because it'll be nice to have a spare room anyway, I think it's nice for kids to share. So yeah it would be the overall size of the property that would make me consider my options rather than just the number of bedrooms. But if you know it's temporary anyway I wouldn't hold off having your second just for space, you will make do with whatever you have

 

[babyjan]

I think it's fine for kids to share, I've shared rooms with my siblings all my life!

 

[Noo]

Personally I think it depends on the entire house. It sounds as though you have a 2 bedroom flat which to me would imply little living space also. I'd have 2 kids in a 2 bedroomed house with a good sized living room and conservatory/dining room for a play room but I'd not want 2 kids in a flat with no play room or space to get away from eachother. I shared with my 2 sisters for a while and hated it. By 7/8 I definitely needed my own space to escape to whether this would be my own room or a 2nd reception room. Having my sisters' friends over and in my room REALLY irritated me as I saw my room as my private space and didn't want someone else whom I didn't choose to be there in there. I think it would depend entirely on your own perspective of how much personal space you feel your children need, how much space you have inside your place and how much it'll financially impact you. My opinion is purely based on my own experience of sharing a room... I didn't consider having another child until we had another room for him.

 

[hulahoop09]

We live in a 2 bed house which is like a starter home. Living room stairs and landing in one, kitchen, 2 bedrooms and a bathroom. We would love a bigger house but our house is worth 25k less than what we paid so we cant afford to move. Cant afford to extend either. We are thinking wait til our daughter is about 10 and see if we can afford to convert loft or have v.small one side brick wall conservatory which me and hubby could use as a bedroom or if not the room our girl and boy will share isnt big but has 2 windows so maybe have a temp wall put in. They will have room for a bed and prob drawers and wont be mich privacy but better than nothing. Or worst come to worse me and hubby will buy a gorge leather sofa bed for living room and sleep there. They can have a room each. Lol. Would love extension but dont want to take away thi.gs like holodays etc that we can enjoy as famiky just so we can maybe afford an extension! I am tressed about it but figure there are worse things in life than siblings sharing.

Xx

 

[amjon]

We have twins in a two bedroom and it's okay. I would have our third here but looks like we're relocating before.

 

[hayz_baby]

We live in a 2 bed house, we moved recently and moved from a 2 to a 2, but the house is much bigger to accommodate a 2nd whereas our last wasn't. Other reasons why we moved too.
If u r not to far from owning your own home (u said £2000 which doesn't sound too far away from a deposit but I obv don't know ur situation) then I would personally wait till I owned a home before having no2. (Maybe try just before) u may get something bigger and u will have more security with a mortgaged home compared to rented. It may also sole ur stair issue which j can understand feeling like that is an issue.
Sorry if I hae also misunderstood some of ur issues x

 

[diggory77]

I only have 1 child but me and my sister shared a room until we were 7 and 9 so I don't see it as an issue. I think that perhaps your financial worries would make me sit down and have a proper think but if you're not able to do all the things you want right now it really just depends on what you'd rather have first - a new addition to the family or to get on the property ladder.

yeah, I think I'm just concerned with having two in my flat and having to do all those steps, very unpractical, but our rent is way lower than most places in the area. So to get around the steps we'd have to rent somewhere else anyway, meaning increasing our outgoings x

 

[diggory77]

I live in a similar flat to you by the sounds of it but am on the 2nd floor. Im pregnant with no.2 and not worried at all about them sharing.
Im more concerned about trying to get them both up and down the stairs on my own as I already find it a challenge with one.
Ideally id like to move by the time my youngest is 5 but more so thag we can have a garden and front door than a room each.

Whilst growing up we had a 3 bedroom house but me and my sister shared until we started school

This is what I'm more concerned about too, the bedrooms I guess I can deal with, it's getting up all those stairs with two.
My husband and I are in an ok financial position. I'm a health professional and he also earns an average income. Childcare is a massive drain on funds but we manage to put money aside for our deposit so we're not too bad off. It's just wondering what to do first really. We're so close to being able to get a house but we'd love a close age gap! Can't have it all at once!
X

 

[summer rain]

We have five kids in a three bedroom flat, though our flat in terms of square footage is larger than most 4 bedroom and even some 5 bedroom new build houses. Also they are all boys. We have tried to do a homeswap but it's just a colossal waste of time. Financially we have always had moderate to severe money worries but while in the future our financial situation is likely to improve, once I get past a certain age the chance to have kids is gone. Just my opinion xx