Sorry you missed having 2 under 2. I'm sure in the long run you will see benefits of having a bigger gap. A small gap wasn't exactly my choice but we decided to go for it because I'm 34 and wanted to leave a possibility to try for #3 after this one. As for doing things differently I had started to try and space the feeds a bit more. She was still feeding about every 2 hrs in the day until recently. I introduced an afternoon snack which means she goes longer in the afternoon without feeding. She also dropped from 3 or 4 night feeds to 1 or 2 on her own. Honestly I'm amazed that I got my cycle back at all with how often she was feeding but she does love her solid food and a lot of the BFing she does is more for comfort, not sure how much difference that makes.
I also used OPKs and discovered that my LP was only 6/7 days. I thought that was going to stop me from getting pregnant but either it suddenly got longer or I got pregnant anyway. It helps to know about when you ovulate though so you know you are not missing your 'fertile window'. Hope you get your BFP soon, I know how it can be fustrating.