Are you ever afraid to test?

[heart4home]

I'm older, like on the very end of any hope of conceiving naturally again, type of old

I had a m/c at 9 weeks in March, then got pregnant again in May but m/c that one at 5 weeks.

I was breastfeeding my two and a half year old, but have basically weaned him over this last month, sort of a last ditch effort to give this what I can.

I tested last Saturday morning at 10 dpo(possibly was only 9dpo) and it was a BFN and I was just a real grump to be around all day because of it. Since then I had resigned myself to the fact that AF was definitely coming.

Now I'm two days late. I don't really have any real strong symptoms other than I've had looser stool in the morning the last 3 days(I sometimes get that the day AF shows, but that's it, but now it's happened 3 days in a row) and occasionally have that metallic taste in my mouth, but I've found I sometimes get that in the 2WW anyways. Oh and occasional back ache and period cramps.

In the past years if I was late, I'd just assume I was pregnant because I'm always a 28 day kind of girl, but I just keep thinking maybe it's just my age, maybe despite my EWCM +++ OPK this month, I didn't even ovulate or something.

The not knowing is killing me, but I like the hopeful feeling. If I test negative, I'm just going to be so upset and grumpy again all weekend.

I am usally an obsessive tester so this is just weird...lol

Can anybody relate?

 

[SugarFairy]

I can totally relate.
When you don't test you can live in blissful ignorance for another day. Thats a nice feeling. But on the flip side, if you don't test then you'll never know.
I say do it! And do it quickly before you can talk yourself out of it! Pee on a stick then leave the room for the required test time so you don't just sit and watch it.
Good luck hunni, I hope this is it for you x