Continuing in my current ranty manner, I am seriously considering starting to hand out little cards to annoying people rather tnan waste my breath explaining myself. I have come up with the following "babywearing manifesto". Any additions?!
1 The manner in which I choose to carry my child has no effect upon you whatsoever and any comment you choose to make is therefore for your own personal gratification.
2 Sitting there with a bum-face is not going to make me re-evaluate my parenting choices so save yourself the wrinkles.
3 No, he is not going to fall out. If this was a major risk then a number of world cultures would have died out many generations ago.
4 No he is not going to suffocate. He is 9 months old and perfectly capable of moving his head.
5 No he is not uncomfortable. Are you uncomfortable with that stick you have rammed up your backside?
6 No he would not be better in a pram. Mainly because if he was in a pram you would now be whinging about how much space prams take up.
7 No, I do not look like an African lady. I am not using an African wrap, I am white and I dont have the level of wrapping skill that ladies from African cultures have. If I did look like an African lady I would not, however, have a problem with this.
8 No, I am not from Eastern Europe. I understand every word you are saying about me as you will find out when I slap you round the chops.
9 I can see you pursing your lips and muttering. Using a sling does not make me either blind or mentally sub-normal.
10 If you decide that it is appropriate to try and grab my baby off my back because you think I am incapable of taking him down safely, then I may decide it is appropriate to start screaming for help.
1 The manner in which I choose to carry my child has no effect upon you whatsoever and any comment you choose to make is therefore for your own personal gratification.
2 Sitting there with a bum-face is not going to make me re-evaluate my parenting choices so save yourself the wrinkles.
3 No, he is not going to fall out. If this was a major risk then a number of world cultures would have died out many generations ago.
4 No he is not going to suffocate. He is 9 months old and perfectly capable of moving his head.
5 No he is not uncomfortable. Are you uncomfortable with that stick you have rammed up your backside?
6 No he would not be better in a pram. Mainly because if he was in a pram you would now be whinging about how much space prams take up.
7 No, I do not look like an African lady. I am not using an African wrap, I am white and I dont have the level of wrapping skill that ladies from African cultures have. If I did look like an African lady I would not, however, have a problem with this.
8 No, I am not from Eastern Europe. I understand every word you are saying about me as you will find out when I slap you round the chops.
9 I can see you pursing your lips and muttering. Using a sling does not make me either blind or mentally sub-normal.
10 If you decide that it is appropriate to try and grab my baby off my back because you think I am incapable of taking him down safely, then I may decide it is appropriate to start screaming for help.
My Cath Kidston baby sling is on it's way to me, and I can't wait to start babywearing! Might have to get some of these cards printed, laminated and on standby in my purse!
