Back to back... Seeking positive support

[SwtlyBlessed]

Our first LO is four months old today We've always wanted to have kids close together, so when I got my period back almost immediately we looked into the safety of conceiving again quickly. Finally my doc said it was safe but that for six months my chances of ovulating would be very small (exclusively breastfeeding). We decided to start trying and just trust that it would happen whenever it happens. I skipped my period but HPT was negative (three times and the last test was when I was over a week late) so I went in for a check up to make sure everything was ok. Turns out I'm about six weeks pregnant!! We are so excited, and as of now it looks like #2 will be due 51 weeks after #1.

But yesterday I called my gynecologist's office and spoke with his *not very nice* nurse. She told me I should probably stop nursing now because it's too hard on the body to do both, and was just generally acting really condescending. I asked if conceiving again so quickly while EBF was uncommon and she said "breastfeeding is not effective contraception." I said I understood that, and that we had actually hoped to conceive again. She said nothing so I tried to reconfirm that conceiving back to back was safe and she actually scoffed and said "well there's nothing you can do about it now." Was my GP, resources, etc all wrong about it being safe? All I could find was a minuscule risk of autism and some partially inconclusive studies on increased preterm labor.

Anyone out there with Irish twins? We were both so excited, but now I'm more worried than anything. She acted like I was so irresponsible and impulsive/careless, which really felt terrible. And of course we don't yet want to share with all of the people I would normally seek support from. It would be great to hear any positive encouragement or experiences from any others who have ever been there

 

[ProudArmyWife]

Ideally you would want to give your body about a year to recooperate but I'm sure it will be perfectly fine. I know several people who had perfectly healthy babies back to back. Good luck and congratulations.

Also as a nurse myself your doctors nurse was very unprofessional and out of line to speak to you in that way. I would def bring it up when you go back.

 

[DobbyForever]

I had so many friends growing up that were less than a year apart, so the parents had to have conceived back to back/ within just months. So I was shocked when I grew up and heard that doctors suggest 6 months of waiting pp to TTC. All of my friends were healthy and are super successful in life. So I think you are perfectly a-ok.

As for the nurse, she is a nurse not a doctor. She shouldn't be commenting at all on anything. Kaiser won't let anyone other than your gyn say anything about anything. I would definitely bring it up the next time you call in. That's not cool.

Congrats!

 

[skyesmom]

^^ wss - i had loads of friends who were very close together in age (one colleague of mine was the youngest of 4 and they were all 1 year apart in age - meaning her mom did 4 years being pregnant in a row - she wanted 4 kids and close in age and then to be done with it and focus on her career once the kids were in school - which she amazingly did!).

i never heard of a certain "safety" waiting period - and i honestly think that our bodies and nature are way smarter than any doctor out there - if your body got the period on its own and then got pregnant on its own, it means that it's ready - if it weren't feeling ready it would have waited longer. Same with nursing - if you still can nurse while being pregnant - good. if your milk supply diminishes or you start feeling really exhausted you can always lean onto bottle feeding. but i wouldn't just quit it out of the blue because some nurse said it on the phone.

 

[Lyo28]

I got a shock bfp when my first child was only about 10 weeks. It wasnot planned but we had planned to start ttc when he was 12 months. But still got an awful shock. So we have Irish twins and I'm Irish 😀 .

It worked out fine. The worst for me was the pregnancy with my dd while caring for baby. I had polyhydraminos ano was so sore ano uncomfortable. Also he was a very difficult baby. But once she came it really was totally manageable. They are great friends now and I wouldn't change a thing. They are great playmates.

And it couldn't have been that bad as we had another within 2 years and had 3 under 3 for a few months!

 

[Mattsgirl]

My parents concieved back to back. My younger sister was born 8 days before my first birthday. My sister is perfectly healthy. We love being so close. I've had like 3 doctors tell me that unless you had complications or a csection there isn't any risk to have them back to back.
And that nrse was crazy rude. I would have asked to talk to someone more professional.

 

[KimmyLou]

My 2 eldest boys are 4 days short of a year apart. we struggling for a long time to conceive so agreed that if it happened again then it would be a gift. I fell pregnant the one time me and dh dtd!! The boys are now 5 and 4 and are brilliant together.
I also know a few people who had very close aged children who continued to breastfeed Xx