Best friend due a baby exactly when my DD was for the baby I lost early

Discussion in 'Long Term Trying To Conceive' started by Lunabelle, Jan 14, 2020.

  1. Lunabelle

    Lunabelle Mother of one

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2015
    Messages:
    187
    Likes Received:
    12
    We did an FET for an embryo that we had had frozen for years. It was meant to be a perfect quality embryo so we were too sure it would work, I couldn't help but think about that embryo almost daily. Waiting that we could do the transfer. Around the same time of the transfer my best friend told me they dropped contraception to see if they would have a baby. Now she is due a baby the same week my due date would have been.

    I had a miscarriage before which lasted a little longer than this time, but this time was the hardest because of the attachment I already felt for the embryo/ child.

    When she first told me she is pregnant I was so excited for her, there's no reason for me not to be. I wouldn't wish this hardship to anyone, especially not to my friends. But when she told me the weeks and I quickly calculated the DD which happens very fast when you have been TTC for so long, it was a bit of a shock. It's just it's a constant reminder for the baby I lost. I would now be this far along, the baby would now be this old... and because we are so close I am going to be following the pregnancy from near too. In a month or two I might be pregnant too, but the grief for the baby we lost will still be there.

    At the same time I am so happy and excited that she is going to have a cute little bundle of joy and I can't wait to find out if it's a girl or a boy, to see the ultrasound photos, see the bump growing and to meet the baby. But at the same time I can't hold the tears for the baby that we could have had. I just wish there had been at least a little more time between the two, so it wasn't a constant reminder.

    This is infertility.
     
  2. HLx

    HLx Mummy to Layla, George & Enzo <3

    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2018
    Messages:
    2,760
    Likes Received:
    1,077
    I'm so sorry this must be so hard for you, but you sound like an amazing friend to have <3
     
  3. Bevziibubble

    Bevziibubble Well-Known Member
    Moderator

    Joined:
    Aug 19, 2012
    Messages:
    135,195
    Likes Received:
    8,167
    I'm so sorry :hugs: I can't imagine what you must be going through but I agree with the above poster what a good friend you are <3
     
  4. Lunabelle

    Lunabelle Mother of one

    Joined:
    Jan 7, 2015
    Messages:
    187
    Likes Received:
    12
    Thanks guys, such a nice thing for you to say. I just hope I can view her pregnancy separately from our loss and not have it constantly reminding from our loss.
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice