Can I ask what happens...

[Bride2b]

at the funeral service?

I am waiting on the chaplain to call regarding the service. I would like to know in my mind what happens?

I am so impatient (although its been almost 3 weeks and this should have been all sorted by now) but I cant wait until the chaplain calls to get the info I need. I need to be able to think about things and get used to the idea of what we are going to experience.

We have decided on a cremation at the local crematorium. I know at the hospital they told me it is only a short service.....but what does this involve? Music? Prayers? Poems? Where do we start with deciding on stuff like this?

Any insight into this would be great, but I do not want anyone to be upset by sharing what they went through xx

 

[OliveBay]

We chose two readings (Too Soon and Little Snowdrop) which the chaplain read, and left the music choices to the chaplain as we didn't have anything specific we wanted. The choices should be totally yours- you can have whatever you want, or if you don't know or don't have a preference someone like the chaplain should be able to provide you with some guidance.

I spent hours looking on the internet for poems which fitted most closely with how we felt - there is a lot of stuff out there, most of which had me in floods of tears so be prepared with a hugs stack of tissues if you start googling

My hubby also chose to carry our baby's tiny coffin into the crematorium. It was the saddest, most tender gesture ever

If you want to ask me any more specific questions please just ask

 

[TrinUC]

at the funeral service?

I am waiting on the chaplain to call regarding the service. I would like to know in my mind what happens?

I am so impatient (although its been almost 3 weeks and this should have been all sorted by now) but I cant wait until the chaplain calls to get the info I need. I need to be able to think about things and get used to the idea of what we are going to experience.

We have decided on a cremation at the local crematorium. I know at the hospital they told me it is only a short service.....but what does this involve? Music? Prayers? Poems? Where do we start with deciding on stuff like this?

Any insight into this would be great, but I do not want anyone to be upset by sharing what they went through xx

I didn't know what was going to happen either. As soon as I got discharged from the hospital I made it over to the funeral home to start preparing everything, there we were introduced to a counselor who helped us throughout the process. We had a burial Tuesday, the 13th.

On Tuesday before they took the casket to the chapel they let my OH and I spend some time with the baby and place special items in the casket with her before they sealed it. When we were finished, they sealed her casket and transported her to the chapel.

From 11-1 we had visitation in the chapel there at the memorial park. My dad is a minister so he prepared his own readings and then said a couple of prayers.
At 1, we left the chapel, they had my OH and I ride in the limousine with the casket between us. The procession followed us to the burial site (which was just around the corner from the chapel). When we arrived to the burial site, my OH carried Angel Adalynn's casket her plot, then my father said another prayer and they asked my OH and I if we wanted to witness the actual burial part, which we did. They covered her plot and we placed two white roses over her plot and that was it...

 

[SarahJane]

Ours was a simple service with just a few prayers and readings plus a poem paul wrote and a hymn which I wanted.

It was only 15 mins but I loved it.

The chaplain asked what we wanted, shared some ideas and then did it as we asked.

I hope you also get a lovely service xx

 

[mhazzab]

I'm so glad you managed to get some progress made on getting a date

We had a non-religious service conducted by a humanist, with some words and poetry. If it would help I will send a copy if the service.
We had music played while everyone was gathering, and again while we left. I've forgotten the proper name of the music we used but will add these in later when I get out of bed!

I also spent a whole evening searching the Internet for just the right poetry and me and hubby spent the evening bawling our eyes out! I might also have a few poems saved somewhere I could send if you want
Our service was beautiful, so fitting for our angels
Xx

 

[collie_crazy]

We choose to have a burial so might be differnt to yours but we wanted things kept very simple. The funeral car arrived and took the flowers from us which they placed in the boot - they had my OH sit with the babies coffin on his lap as a normal herse is too big for a babies coffin to be secured. We went straight to the cemetery and it was just us, family and the funeral director. We lowered the coffin and everyone threw in a pink rose and some sand, I then said some words and read the poem No Hello No Goodbye and my mum read - Little Snowdrop... my OH then released a pink balloon and we left. I think I had to keep it simple to get through it.

I dont know how I got through the day but I did I think I was mostly on auto-pilot.

I love this poem

I never got to hear you laugh
you never saw me cry

Didn’t get a chance to say "Hello"
you never said "Goodbye"

I didn't think that I could feel
so sad, lost and forlorn

I never knew God chose his Angels
before some of them were born

Your life was short yet special
I shared it all exclusively

I felt you breathe, I felt you kick
you were alive inside of me

And although we are not together
we're not really apart

For you'll always occupy a space
deep within my heart

Time they say will ease my pain,
but every day now I cry

When I wish I could have said "Hello"
and heard you say "Goodbye"

 

[Bride2b]

Hi all thank you for sharing your experiences. Any poems / songs etc would be very welcomed as I dont know where to start. I did have a little look on the internet last night but typing the words 'songs for a babies funeral' into google just felt so horrible! I didnt last long before the tears started rolling, but couldnt look for long as OH best mate was on his way over.

Thanks ladies xx