cancelling wedding

[Nemo and bump]

anyone feel like cancelling their wedding and just secretly doing it, just you and oh?

we are!
my family are being a nightmare with wedding some arent coming as they dont get on with others, they are moaning about having ti travel 3hours up the a1, they dont like my ideas etc, they dont like that its not in a church... i could go on.

i feel like saying you know what dont come,but i doubt i could ever say that to them. me and oh wanted to get married in new york but didnt as family dont like flying/medical conditions etc. last night we were talking and thought why are we doing this? we are doing it for them not us. its not the wedding we want and we'll just end up stressed and not enjoying our day worrying over family etc.

so we thought maybe go on 'holiday' in summer before wedding and have our wedding we want in new york and then not tell people. then when they come up for wedding day we just have the meal/reception and be like surprise!!

what do you think? what are your thoughts?

 

[pinkmummy]

At the end of the day its YOUR wedding hun not theirs. We have been doing the same and the other day I just snapped. I don't want his sister to be a bridesmaid as we NEVER see her and I told his mother and she started making excuses for his sister. At the end of the day its up to us, its what WE want not them so I say go for it hun!! xx

 

[Mynxie]

if that's what you want, you should do it!

It's your day - and if people don't like it, that's their problem not yours. the day is about you 2 not them.

 

[Eoz]

I'm doing it! Only my closest friends know the tuth x

 

[Nemo and bump]

the only thing is my oh has two other girls and i wouldn't want them to feel pushed out as such. i just dont know

 

[pinkmummy]

Is there no way you can say you wanna take them away with you an take them iykwim xx

 

[x-amy-x]

I dont think that you should 'surprise' them. But deffo go with the wedding you want. By not telling them, i think you'll create more problems than if they knew you were going iykwim?

 

[Suz]

Its your day Sweetie... You do what you want. Wedding planning is so stressfull....you do what you want because its your day not your families day...and if they cant see it that way well they dont deserve to celibrate with you.

 

[Eoz]

the only thing is my oh has two other girls and i wouldn't want them to feel pushed out as such. i just dont know

Do it on the week you have contact?he must be able to take them on holiday?

 

[Nemo and bump]

the only thing is my oh has two other girls and i wouldn't want them to feel pushed out as such. i just dont know

Do it on the week you have contact?he must be able to take them on holiday?

thats a good point.

 

[Dinoslass]

I'd say go for it. Get married in New York like you two want and just have a party on your planned wedding day. At the end of the day it is your wedding and you should do it the way you want to. We got married just with our parents and brothers there, just what we wanted. And then had a party for everyone else who wanted to come. Never regretted it. It was what we wanted and we loved it.

 

[Dinoslass]

Sorry, was a bit too hasty in my reply. Of course your OH would like his other girls to be there two. But yes, why don't take them on a holiday to New York, heheh!

 

[Nemo and bump]

i think i'll have a serious disscussion with oh when he wakes up. i'll let you know once we've decided what to do

 

[Blob]

OMG i soooo would i really want to just get married the two of us and Tabitha, i dont care about the whole wedding bit i just want to be his wife

 

[katycam]

I reckon you should do it, i would love to, but i really want MY family there. Just not his

 

[maratobe]

i say go for it if they are gonna be like that! its yours and your OHs day...if they are gonna be like that then they wont be there lol
good luck talking to your OH!

 

[Arlandria]

anyone feel like cancelling their wedding and just secretly doing it, just you and oh?

we are!
my family are being a nightmare with wedding some arent coming as they dont get on with others, they are moaning about having ti travel 3hours up the a1, they dont like my ideas etc, they dont like that its not in a church... i could go on.

i feel like saying you know what dont come,but i doubt i could ever say that to them. me and oh wanted to get married in new york but didnt as family dont like flying/medical conditions etc. last night we were talking and thought why are we doing this? we are doing it for them not us. its not the wedding we want and we'll just end up stressed and not enjoying our day worrying over family etc.

so we thought maybe go on 'holiday' in summer before wedding and have our wedding we want in new york and then not tell people. then when they come up for wedding day we just have the meal/reception and be like surprise!!

what do you think? what are your thoughts?

Aw honey, this must be putting such a strain on you and it'll only make it a headache rather than the special day you both deserve!

You've already said yourself, that you should be doing this for yourselves and noone else! But i know how hard that is - easier said than done sometimes!

But just remember you only do this once, it cost a lot of time & money and its something that people should just stand back and say 'this is your day do what makes you happy!'

You dont have to be rude if thats not you (me on the other hand ) just sit and have a quite word and tell them how miserable its making you feel - you'll be suprised at how they will react!

Be strong and DO WHAT YOU WANT TO DO it'll all work out in the end and your day will be magical no matter what people say XXX

 

[Nemo and bump]

we've decided to go ahoead with the planned wedding. its not fair on oh's family as they've not done abything wrong and his nan is so looking forward to it and is very old and is determined to get better for the wedding so i couldnt take that away from her. im going to talk to my family and if they cant be happy then dont come.

thanks for all your opinions and thoughts though. x