Choosing who gets to be in the room......need advice please!!!

[LoveMy2Boys2]

Hi ladies!
So this is my 3rd baby.... Both deliveries have been just me and my husband.... We let family/friends come in for visits until it was time to push...... Well this is our last baby, and I only have 1 sister..... She most likely won't be able to have babies due to many issues, they have still been trying and she is heartbroken and devastated..... Today she asked if I would consider letting her be in the room when I deliver.....
I truly would be honored to give her that much, let her be there and see the whole experience since she probably won't have that chance in life.... ( I truly can't even imagine .... I feel so blessed to have my 3 and can spare the embarrassment of my open vagina or poo during pushing for her sake lol) but my husband has 2 sisters , and then there are our parents..... Which I want NONE of them in the room while pushing...... Do you think they will be upset? Or drama? I feel this is an understandable situation...... I'm also worried what if my husband says he wants one person in The room from his side... Is it still fair for me to say no? I feel like if he chose his mom then my mom would be offended she's not there , then one more person after another would justify being there also..... I'm not sure how to handle this situation as I want to let my sister be there but don't want anybody else in there, simply for the fact it's just a private thing for me.... Emotionally and physically.....
Any advice would be greatly appreciated!
Thank you!!!

 

[reeshy]

If I were in that case, I would let my sister be there and then deal with consequences afterwards. They could be bent about it, but these are all YOUR choices, not theirs.

I might be weird though because I wouldn't even have the other people allowed in the room during non pushing times so they wouldn't know that my sis was ever there before them...

 

[ajlj1126]

This is such an exceptionally beautiful gift you are giving to your sister! It would be so low and so sad and so spiteful if anyone else were to try to ruin this amazing thing you're doing for her by being jealous/demanding! If they don't understand then oh well. Too bad for them. I can't imagine in a million years being mad at something like this... if you were my sister/friend/daughter, etc., I would be so touched and proud of you for doing this for your sister I wouldn't even think to be jealous/angry! I truly hope everyone else understands and doesn't taint this with any drama!

 

[Mrs Dragonfly]

I would let your sister be in the birth room with you, it's an amazing gift you could give her. I would hope that the rest of the family would view it the same and not cause any drama. For me personally, even if people did get dramatic, I would see it well worth it for your sister to be able to be with you.

 

[Mummy to be x]

I agree with the other ladies, I'd allow your sister to be there, that's an amazing thing for you to let her do.

Here though, people don't expect to be in the labour room, it's just me and my partner. That's it. Simple.

If anyone was to ask me if they could be there I'd just politely tell them it's something I want to share between me and my partner only.

It's up to them now they handle it good luck!

 

[lj2245]

The labour and birthing part is all about you and your baby. No one else. It's not about family members getting any kind of experienceor a free show or who DH wants there to support him. You are the one who will need support and it's entirely up to you who you have there. If you want your sister, have your sister and tell everyone else to wind their necks in. Tell DH it's his job to be supportive of that choice and deal with any objections from his family.

It irks me a little that family members seem to think that they have any rights to be in a room just because another relative is. If they want to watch a live birth they can all have their own. Your sister can't and you actually want her there. Go for it

 

[mandaa1220]

I also would have your sister. Screw everyone else. Birthing is such a private and personal experience.

 

[sethsmummy]

That's an amazing gift your giving her Hun. I would allow her in and tell your Dh and everyone else that you will have no one else there as this is a private time for.Not only you and your Dh but your sister is going to be extremely emotional during this experience and they should all think of that before saying anything. Neither of you will need someone else there (apart from your oh) that could make the situation harder for.her to deal with.

Your an amazing sister for giving her this opportunity xx

 

[LoveMy2Boys2]

Wow, thank you so much for the supportive and kind words, this definatley took a big weight off my shoulder about what to do with the others feelings ..... You are all right, this is a beautiful gift for my one and only sister, and if they can't see that then shame on them..... I hope it all goes well, and I hope she gets something amazing out of this experience ..... Appreciate the input ladies!!! I hope my husband understands, I haven't told him yet ..... I wanted a chance to talk to him in person when the kids aren't around and we have some alone time....

 

[lemongrass]

If anyone doesn't understand just tell them that they can make their own decisions about who is in the room when THEY are the ones pushing a human out.