Ill never forget the day I ran out of gas. I dont mean I let my fuel get a little low. I mean I ran all the way out of gas to the point that my car wouldnt budge an inch. Not one smidgen. It wasnt that I was out of money or didnt have a wallet full of credit cards. I just didnt notice the gas light that was shining as brightly as a fog light at the bottom of my dashboard. Maybe I thought I was in too much of a hurry to take a few minutes to pull into a gas station and fill up. Whatever the case, I found myself in a busy parking lot watching everyone around me scurry off to where they needed to go and my car just sat there, gas tank parched and dry, and pulled out my trusty cell phone to call for help. Within a half hour or so my parents came to my rescue, chauffeured me to a nearby gas station and I returned with sloshing fuel can in hand. My carriage sputtered back to life and I sped down the road to finish filling my tank, all the while hearing the gleeful offers my giggling dad was making to give me gas money if I needed it.
Have you run out of gas? Im not talking about your vehicle. Im speaking of your heart. Infertility can take such a toll on you and if youre not careful you can spiritually run out of gas. You may not have noticed the warning signs either. Maybe youve prayed for a baby until you simply dont know what words to offer to heaven any more so you began to occasionally skip your quiet time. Now you dont even remember the last time you had personal devotions. Perhaps your Bible has a layer of dust on it. It can become so difficult to lift your hands in worship when your heart is heavy in grief following the miscarriage of your precious baby. You may be finding yourself running out of gas.
If your heart has run out of fuel, youre a lot like my car. You may be unable to function. It didnt matter how nice my car looked to anyone passing by, I couldnt start the engine and drive down the road without gasoline. You may look fine to your friends or co-workers. People may not even know the burden of baby hunger you carry, but if your heart is spiritually out of gas, you cant function the way God designed you to. You, my friend, need a fill up.
How do you revive your spiritual engine? One very specific way is found in the book of Lamentations. (A book named mourning may seem a strange starting point for a spiritual revival, but perhaps one who has felt close companionship understands how to survive heartache better than one who has not.) Lamentations 3:21-22 says This I recall to my mind, therefore I have hope. The LORDS lovingkindnesses indeed never cease, for His compassions never fail. They are new every morning; Great is Your faithfulness. If your spiritual tank was on empty yesterday because you started another period or you received another baby shower invitation in the mail, take heart. Gods compassions toward you are new every morning and His faithfulness is great. The writer of Lamentations says he recalls these things to his mind when he is discouraged. When your heart hurts, remind yourself that God is faithful to you and that His compassion toward you is new every day. Remind yourself that you can have hope because of Gods great faithfulness and allow your spiritual fuel tank to begin to refill.
Romans 15:4 says For everything that was written in the past was written to teach us, so that through endurance and the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope. There are countless instances in the Bible of God doing the impossible for and through common people. Because of Gods intervention in the lives of ordinary humans, a teenaged boy overcame a lion and a bear, an axe head floated, and the walls of a city fell down because of the obedience of a glorified marching band. Of course, the most encouraging stories for you at this point in your life would have to be the repeated accounts of God granting babies to infertile couples--Abraham and Sarah, Isaac and Rebekah, Jacob and Rachel, Manoah and his wife, Hannah and Elkanah, Zacharias and Elizabeth. Read these stories. Read them again. Remind yourself that these were ordinary, flawed people who served an extraordinary, perfect God and feel hope rising within you. Do you feel your spiritual supply replenishing yet?
When I filled my gas tank with fuel an amazing thing happened. The engine roared to life. I was able to take off down the road and carry on with my day. I went to the store, ran some errands, made it home before nightfall and was able to do everything I needed to do. When your spiritual gas tank is refilled, youll find the strength to do what you need to do as well to make it through your infertility journey. God will grant the strength you need to make it through another birthday, the birth of another friends baby, the arrival of another niece or nephew. Hell help you make the right decision about medical care, adoption, or waiting a little longer. Just keep that tank filled.
That is awesome news!!
