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Clomid Club Graduate Buddies
- Thread starter babyloulou
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Peach Blossom
Mummy to Lili
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I text him earlier asking if he could stay here tonight cos Lili is kicking off and I'm ill. He said he didn't know how cos the taxi from the airport is booked to take him back to his Mums... Is he being driven by a robot?! His mum lives 10 mins away... I give up!
V, I loved my dreamG... Used it every night from 10weeks! X
V, I loved my dreamG... Used it every night from 10weeks! X
lisaf
Super tired new mom
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that taxi thing is ridiculous 
He's acting like he's being made to 'try' and is throwing a stupid tantrum like a child and thinking up any excuse he can to weasel out of something.
If you're done with him, I don't blame you. If you still feel like you have to try, then these are all things that should be brought up in counseling... I think you should start writing them down so you don't forget them!
He's acting like he's being made to 'try' and is throwing a stupid tantrum like a child and thinking up any excuse he can to weasel out of something.If you're done with him, I don't blame you. If you still feel like you have to try, then these are all things that should be brought up in counseling... I think you should start writing them down so you don't forget them!
Peach Blossom
Mummy to Lili
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Lisa, I'm not sure if I want to go to counselling... I don't know if we can work it out. It feels like we've gone too far now.
Suz, I agree!! Xx
Suz, I agree!! Xx
lisaf
Super tired new mom
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If thats how you feel, then thats totally fine. I just know that its one thing to sit here and say he's an idiot and not worth your time and a completely different thing to tell your heart to stop caring about him and to face the reality of a joint custody situation for the rest of Lili's life. I remember you saying how important it was to you to have both parent's in Lili's life.
I don't think that means you should put up with unreasonable and hurtful behavior or stay with someone who really doesn't love you, treat you right or want to even be with you. It sounds like you guys do not have a good dynamic right now for discussing problems and that things spiral out of control quickly. He's so used to you giving in that whenever you stand your ground or insist on something it seems like extreme behavior from his perspective so he lashes out like a child who has never had boundaries suddenly being told they can't have a cookie.
If you do want things to have a chance, it might be a good idea to stop trying to work things out without a counselor, at least for right now because every conflict just seems to make things worse because of how you guys are reacting to each other (I believe your reactions are justified, for the record).
Euronova
One DS, pregnant again
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I agree with Lisa about the tantrums and the fact that it seems the situation at the mo is just too volatile.
But you have shown real signs of giving him a chance, letting him hug you, following his crazy requests about when and where to talk.
You have set a few reasonable requests that would have meant you could have worked it out and he refused all of them!
I am sorry but even if we only have your side of the story, there are a few things that blatantly prove he is just not pulling his finger and not doing anything to work it out. He is the one that is making it difficult for you to have even a cordial relationship for Lili... there is only so much you can do to make it work, if he doesn't fulfil his part of the deal it won't work!
But you have shown real signs of giving him a chance, letting him hug you, following his crazy requests about when and where to talk.
You have set a few reasonable requests that would have meant you could have worked it out and he refused all of them!
I am sorry but even if we only have your side of the story, there are a few things that blatantly prove he is just not pulling his finger and not doing anything to work it out. He is the one that is making it difficult for you to have even a cordial relationship for Lili... there is only so much you can do to make it work, if he doesn't fulfil his part of the deal it won't work!
lisaf
Super tired new mom
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I also see that it's only been a few days since this all came out. Things are bound to be super volatile right now and it won't get resolved overnight. Counseling is still a good idea because you guys have to figure out how to co-parent in a civil way. Ni am so glad my parents worked out their parenting agreements in a way to minimize the conflict us kids would experience.
babyloulou
1 beautiful baby boy!
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Only just seen all this - I'd unsubscribed from the thread by mistake and didn't think anyone had posted since my last post 
Jess- I am so sorry. He is being such a dick! I agree with what the girls have said and think Lisa's last remarks about him not being able to cope with you not being a pushover are spot on! You can't make this work unless he gets his head out of his arse! The fucking tosser!!
I'm sorry you're poorly now too Is there anything we can do? X
Thanks for all the lovely picture comments girls
Jess- I am so sorry. He is being such a dick! I agree with what the girls have said and think Lisa's last remarks about him not being able to cope with you not being a pushover are spot on! You can't make this work unless he gets his head out of his arse! The fucking tosser!!
I'm sorry you're poorly now too
Is there anything we can do? XThanks for all the lovely picture comments girls
Onelildream
Newly preg with #4
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Jess I agree with Lisa. He is being ridiculous. We want you to do what u need to, whether that's to stay or go, but regardless, he needs to really get his act together! I am sorry. What a jerk.
Euronova
One DS, pregnant again
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Morning! How is everyone feeling?
Just had a fit at the puppy barking its head off at nothing. Usually she stopped when I ask and I am pretty good at training them positively but had a bottle of water in my hand and just showered her lol... She has not made a sound since lol!
I find that I had more cramps if I feel stressed, so need to relax really.
Also massive lower back pains this morning which I've not had before.
A lot of the girls on the June thread have had their 12 weeks scan. A few of them have found out that the baby has died or stopped developing...., I am getting more and more nervous now about the scan... Still 2 weeks and a half to wait!
Just had a fit at the puppy barking its head off at nothing. Usually she stopped when I ask and I am pretty good at training them positively but had a bottle of water in my hand and just showered her lol... She has not made a sound since lol!
I find that I had more cramps if I feel stressed, so need to relax really.
Also massive lower back pains this morning which I've not had before.
A lot of the girls on the June thread have had their 12 weeks scan. A few of them have found out that the baby has died or stopped developing...., I am getting more and more nervous now about the scan... Still 2 weeks and a half to wait!
That's sad V it's less likely to happen to you because you've seen the HB. although it's still a possibility and it happened to Verna on here
But stay positive!
I have got backache too just had a little snooze with Sammuel but need to do some work now...
X x x
it's less likely to happen to you because you've seen the HB. although it's still a possibility and it happened to Verna on here But stay positive!
I have got backache too
just had a little snooze with Sammuel but need to do some work now... X x x
Peach Blossom
Mummy to Lili
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Morning 
V, try to relax and not think any negative thoughts. Where in London do you live? Would you like me to book you a Gentle Birth session? She'll do some visualisation with you and give you a treatment. I, more than most, know how scary the early stages of pregnancy are and there are no guarantees. I'm not going to sit here and tell you it will all be ok, because I don't know that. What I do know is that I hope it is and I'll be thinking positive thoughts and praying for you the whole way through the pregnancy. The stats are 1 in 4 which is why some of your friends on the June thread will have had the worst news. But think positively hon. Close your eyes and visulaise your bubs all safe and warm and protected in your womb.
Suz, I took the day off work... I feel crap! I dropped Lili off at the childminders and went back to bed for 2 and a half hours. Joe's picking her up and taking her to his Mum's today... I just feel so sad for my poor little girl getting caught up in all of this stupid stupid behaviour.
V, try to relax and not think any negative thoughts. Where in London do you live? Would you like me to book you a Gentle Birth session? She'll do some visualisation with you and give you a treatment. I, more than most, know how scary the early stages of pregnancy are and there are no guarantees. I'm not going to sit here and tell you it will all be ok, because I don't know that. What I do know is that I hope it is and I'll be thinking positive thoughts and praying for you the whole way through the pregnancy. The stats are 1 in 4 which is why some of your friends on the June thread will have had the worst news. But think positively hon. Close your eyes and visulaise your bubs all safe and warm and protected in your womb.
Suz, I took the day off work... I feel crap! I dropped Lili off at the childminders and went back to bed for 2 and a half hours. Joe's picking her up and taking her to his Mum's today... I just feel so sad for my poor little girl getting caught up in all of this stupid stupid behaviour.
Jess it's ok. She is so young, by the time any of this shows to her you guys will have sorted things one way or another and she won't be caught up in it all...
Gla you have taken the day off and got some sleep. It must be hard on your own, let alone when you're ill and going through all this crap with Joe...
The 1 in 4 stat is very scary... But just got to be positive and hope for the best...
X x x
Gla you have taken the day off and got some sleep. It must be hard on your own, let alone when you're ill and going through all this crap with Joe...
The 1 in 4 stat is very scary... But just got to be positive and hope for the best...
X x x
babyloulou
1 beautiful baby boy!
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V- like the others said we can't promise things will be ok but there's no reason they won't be. We'll all have everything crossed for you- and the odds are a lot higher in your favour if you've already seen the heartbeat xx
Jess- I'm glad you've got the day off to yourself I don't know if you're interested but there's another thread on BnB by a woman in exactly the sane situation as you- almost identical- right down to the stupid infatuation with a married woman. She's a few months ahead of you as he left a while ago but he sounds very similar to Joe. Let me know if you want me to PM you the thread xx
Jess- I'm glad you've got the day off to yourself
I don't know if you're interested but there's another thread on BnB by a woman in exactly the sane situation as you- almost identical- right down to the stupid infatuation with a married woman. She's a few months ahead of you as he left a while ago but he sounds very similar to Joe. Let me know if you want me to PM you the thread xx
Euronova
One DS, pregnant again
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i know worrying is stupid... thanks for the reassurance! I guess on these forum we are more exposed to the harsh reality of ttc and pregnancies!
yes seeing the heartbeat was definitely a big milestone, i just have to keep looking at all my symptoms as reassuring things, sometime i nearly want them to be worse than they already are but let's not actually wish that!
I have not had any bleeding whatsoever so I know this is also a good sign. I can definitely see that i am filling up a bit in the pelvic area, so I think all is well. My progesterone was so high and so was my HSG levels... so really there is no reason!
I just wish sometime i didn't read so much on the forum or on the internet... but i also know that it's really helped me through TTC.... you have to take the good and the bad!
Jess, I live in South West London near Richmond/Barnes, so I think not far from you (or just not far from WF) thanks for suggesting the gentle birth thing, i did go on their website and might order a book to start and see how i get on
Jess, what happened with Lili when you were pregnant? I am not sure I will ever be able to read back the nearly 3000 pages i missed
I agree with the others, in a way it's lucky that Lili is so young, by the time the situation is sorted out and settled, she prob won't have noticed much. She can still adapt so easily to new situation. Oliver's sister is in a messy situation, the father of her child (who she is supposedly separated with... although sometime we are not so sure) is very violent verbally and sometime physically... her child is 2yo... and he is really picking up on it now, it's really horrible.
I think I might order a doppler... i know this might not be the best idea if i get really hooked up on it but i feel it might help me when I have moments of panic... i know it will be a bit soon to pick up the heartbeat but hopefully I will be able soon...
yes seeing the heartbeat was definitely a big milestone, i just have to keep looking at all my symptoms as reassuring things, sometime i nearly want them to be worse than they already are but let's not actually wish that!
I have not had any bleeding whatsoever so I know this is also a good sign. I can definitely see that i am filling up a bit in the pelvic area, so I think all is well. My progesterone was so high and so was my HSG levels... so really there is no reason!
I just wish sometime i didn't read so much on the forum or on the internet... but i also know that it's really helped me through TTC.... you have to take the good and the bad!
Jess, I live in South West London near Richmond/Barnes, so I think not far from you (or just not far from WF) thanks for suggesting the gentle birth thing, i did go on their website and might order a book to start and see how i get on
Jess, what happened with Lili when you were pregnant? I am not sure I will ever be able to read back the nearly 3000 pages i missed
I agree with the others, in a way it's lucky that Lili is so young, by the time the situation is sorted out and settled, she prob won't have noticed much. She can still adapt so easily to new situation. Oliver's sister is in a messy situation, the father of her child (who she is supposedly separated with... although sometime we are not so sure) is very violent verbally and sometime physically... her child is 2yo... and he is really picking up on it now, it's really horrible.
I think I might order a doppler... i know this might not be the best idea if i get really hooked up on it but i feel it might help me when I have moments of panic... i know it will be a bit soon to pick up the heartbeat but hopefully I will be able soon...
