Considering at-home insemination with donor sperm...?

[kezza78]

GRRRRRRRRRRRRR

I'm so annoyed in fact make that MAD!!! Donor was meant to come over last night to do his stuff as i'm O today, he leaves it till 11pm to let us know he can't come (had to be up at 5am for work), may as well add tired to my emotions as well!!!!! Although he is a lovely guy he's tendency to let us down is starting to wear me down, i know he's the one helping the us but if he could just be honest and say he can't make it this month then atleast we'd know were we stand.....it's just so frustrating waiting around...He's was meant to be coming over tomorrow too but still don't know if he is...i hate being in limbo... Really sorry for the rant just needed to get it off my chest!!
I had a really good feeling about this month too, it's my third cycle on Clomid and the CBFM as been spot on......i just feel like crying .

Anyway enough of the rant..... welcome Daisy!

 

[topazicatzbet]

sorry hun, its a night mare to be let down like that.

 

[Nimyra]

So sorry, Kezza. How frustrating!

 

[LunaBean]

Im sorry you're donor is messing you about, Ive had a few who didn't turn up at the last minute, even one who said he was on his way, didn't show up, heard nothing for 2 weeks, and he 'claimed' he'd crashed his car on the way here, even tho he'd been on msn and ignoring me the whole 2 weeks! One came up on the Monday, was supposed to come up on the Tuesday, and text that night saying he'd 'caught glandular fever and wouldnt be able to make it for awhile', yet had pictures of a night out on Facebook a few days later! We never heard from him again. One rang at 5pm and said he'd be there at 8pm, 12pm came and still no word, I had eveyrthing laid out ready to do the insems, he text a week later saying his close friend had died, never heard from him again. Another got lost on the way here, rang me for directions, got stopped by the police and fined £60 for being on his phone (which we paid), got here 2 hours later, MISSED THE POT while 'doing the deed', I had 0.5ml in the syringe, and STILL got pregnant that month,lol. We've went through ALOT of donors, as you can tell!

If we didn't laugh we'd cry! Do you think your donor maybe has cold feet, but just doesn't want to tell you? We had that with a few of our donors, cancelling at the last minute etc, then just stopped contacting us.

Tammy, baby Dabhán isn't doing so well He was taken back into hospital last night, his head has started to swell again, so they drilled a tiny hole through his soft spot today to try and drain some of the fluid, they'll doin it 2 more times over the next week, and if it doesnt work, he'll have to have a shunt fitted He isn't keeping his milk down now either There's a new pic of him in hosp in my journal, OH's dad set her it last night. Poor wee thing.

They said he also has a stridor, where he makes a funny noise when he's breathing in, as if he cant get a breath, but they think he'll grow out of it.

 

[DaisyDoodles]

That's really horrible Kezza, I know these guys are doing a wonderful thing for us, but surely your donor realises how emotional this is for you and how much it throws you out by not turning up?!

Really hope he turns up tomorrow for you!

I don't know what I'll do if our donor turns out to be unreliable, we're going to have to drive almost 3 hours each way to see him!

 

[LunaBean]

I think sometimes the donors dont actually realise how emotionally stressful this whole thing is, Ive had a few just text out of the blue, say a week after they'd been here, saying they're in the area and can come over, and dont really understand that it needs to be a certain times/date etc, abd think Im being difficult! The same when I need one that Tuesday, he'll text back saying 'Im watching a match that day, I'll be up on Thursday' :doh: It's maddening! Thankfully we have a great reliable one at the minute, ad another few as back-ups!!

Have you thought about maybe having one as back-up, just incase one isn't available?

 

[RubyRainbows]

Kezza -- that really sucks about your donor. I thought he sounded a bit unreliable from your posts the other day. I was hoping he would come thru for you though this month. Maybe, like Lizzie said, you can find a back-up donor?? I would hate to see this happen to you again next month. Maybe you can have a chat with him to see if maybe he is getting cold feet about the whole thing. Sorry, hang in there!

Lizzie, so sorry to hear about the baby. I was hoping you would have good news. I will check your journal to see his latest picture. How do you pronounce his name?

My OH took a test this morning & it was negative. We are both very disappointed but still hopeful -- i know it was pretty early to test -- AF isn't even due until Tuesday. So -- still keeping my FX'ed!

 

[LunaBean]

You pronounce his name Daa-vin Silly Irish spelling! lol Boo for negative tests, its still wayyy early tho! Good luck!

 

[kezza78]

Thanks for the kind words folk.

Myself and OH were talking last night and are going to start looking for another donor, hoping we can find one soon tho don't want to waste another month. Why can't things just be simple and straight forward!! I'll keep you all posted on what's happening.

Baby dust to all.

 

[RubyRainbows]

We tested again this morning & got another !



Feeling sooo disappointed. I think we will just wait until Tuesday to see if that evil witch shows her ugly face!

 

[LunaBean]

Aw I'm sorry Some people dont get it til later, she's not out yet! Fingers crossed for you!!!!

 

[Nimyra]

so sorry, MommyTammy. *hugs*

 

[lindseyry]

Tammy, you're not out yet! But, Im sorry you're feeling down and out.... Hopefully, you've just got a late implanter.

Im just sitting around, waiting - waiting - waiting. Depending on my bbt, Ill poas on Friday. So far my bbt chart looks really good. FF says I Od on CD 16 and tcoyf says I Od on CD 15. Im thinking I Od in the night between CD 15 and CD 16. Anyway, I guess we'll just have to wait and see!

 

[RubyRainbows]

Thanks girls... a very unwanted & uninvited guest arrived today!!!!! I hate you AF!

Lindsey -- how are you feeling? Any symptoms? Keep my FX'ed for ya!

 

[day_dreamer]

Has anyone had to get their donor to have an SA?

I've got an appointment at the infertility clinic at the end of August, and have had an internal scan plus day 2, 21, and 35 bloods taken.

My OH will be coming with me to the appointment but I don't want to turn up if they're going to be funny because we haven't had an SA done yet. Should I get him to go to his GP and demand one? And if he does that, how would my specialist get the results? I have no idea what the correct process is?!

 

[Nimyra]

I can't really remember, but I think Erin said that she brought her donor to see her doc and paid for a SA to be done. Maybe she'll chime in.

I think my donor already had one done before I picked him (because he had donated before to other couples).

 

[EpdTTC]

MommyTammy to you. Boo for AF! Maybe you guys could find a known donor and since you are both willing to carry, you could BOTH do inseminations each month and double your chances! Wouldn't it be crazy if you both got pregnant???

Allstars: I did have an SA done on my donor. He gave me a "sample" and I took it to my RE's office and they did the analysis. It cost me $150. Beware, I don't know how the docs are there but here it is very difficult to get a doc to work with you with a donor. They will do it if the guy is your hubby or boyfriend but are reluctant to participate in inseminations with a donor. My doc got to know me and then "gave in" so to speak but originally he was pretty against the idea. Good luck to you!

I am home from my quick trip to CA. I am sooo glad to be home! So far so good, no spotting or anything to worry about. I have an ultrasound on the 26th. I worry sometimes because I don't feel terribly sick or anything but I guess it is not necessary to feel sick in order to have a successful pregnancy. I am very tired, still thirsty, bbs are slightly sore, mild heartburn at least once a day usually, lots of peeing, and occasional small cramps for a few minutes here and there. I think I am doing a good job of staying calm but I won't lie, I worry every time I go to the bath room that I am going to see blood. Giving myself the injections is not a lot of fun and my belly looks like a war zone but hey, whatever it takes.

Hope everyone else is doing well.
Erin

 

[RubyRainbows]

Erin! So glad to hear you are doing well there! Give that little baby bean a rub for me! I wont be trying anytime soon... worried about my insulin level being high! Need to lose weight first & get that down. I stopped taking the metformin for that bc it made me feel so and i had to keep running to the bathroom! Not fun!

I was telling OH how much luck you lovely ladies have had finding "known donors" & she is starting to warm up to the idea! I think it will be a long process trying to find someone normal, tho! The last potential donor i was talking to online seemed normal -- we talked several times & had great conversations. And then he asked if i wanted him to send me a picture of his p*nis!!!!!!!!!! Lol -- so i have dabbled a bit in this process -- but still have a long ways to go before finding "Mr. Right"!

 

[day_dreamer]

Allstars: I did have an SA done on my donor. He gave me a "sample" and I took it to my RE's office and they did the analysis. It cost me $150. Beware, I don't know how the docs are there but here it is very difficult to get a doc to work with you with a donor. They will do it if the guy is your hubby or boyfriend but are reluctant to participate in inseminations with a donor. My doc got to know me and then "gave in" so to speak but originally he was pretty against the idea. Good luck to you!

Thanks for your reply

My GP was very reluctant to even refer me to the hospital in the first place, as when I originally saw her we were contemplating buying sperm from a clinic to do AI ourselves. She point blank told me that there was nothing she could do for us and we'd have to fund ourselves privately (never going to be an option for us!). It was only after a month of blood tests and my internal scan, that I told her we'd spoken with a friend of ours and he was going to be our donor, that she relented. She said she still wasn't sure what the NHS could offer us, but would speak with the consultant and let me know. The consultant is happy to see me for this initial appointment, but I don't know how far things will go after that.

I don't really mind (at this stage) whether it's just the infertility tests that they can offer...I'm not looking to go down the IUI/IVF yet anyway (fingers crossed we don't have to) - and hopefully she'll just be able to prescribe me Clomid to get me ovulating. We'll see I suppose.

Still not sure what to do about our donor and his tests...might have to brave ringing the clinic up and see what they say....don't know what to say to them though and will no doubt make a fool of myself trying to explain our complicated situation!!

Thanks again and good luck

 

[lindseyry]

Tammy - Boo on af showing up! Im sorry - but heres to next month!!

Im just sitting here on 9 DPO. I have not poas yet cause its just heartbreaking to see bfn - or see a bfp and worry that its not gonna hang on.
Ive had a few symptoms off and on - the biggest one was at 7 dpo - really sharp cramps that lasted for about 20 minutes. They were harsh enough I had to sit down and catch my breath.
Normally at 9 dpo I have a spike in bbt, then on 10 dpo it starts to drop. This morning my temp was the same as it was yesterday, which was a tenth of a degree higher than the last two days. In other words - 97.8 Sunday Monday and 97.9 Tuesday and Today. BUT - I started using progesterone cream this cycle after O. So, its quite possible the bbt difference can be because of that. I also had a fallback rise this cycle, which Ive never had before, ever. I know its not a precursor to pregnancy but it was interesting to me anyway. Oh, and my boobs HURT. They arent just pre af tender - they HURT.
So, I dont know whats going on but Im trying to not think too much into it.