Considering at-home insemination with donor sperm...?

[day_dreamer]

Hi ladies...

Just got a couple of questions:

We're talking to someone about them being a donor and I'm just wondering when would be best to arrange donations. I think I'm due to O round about the 15th Dec but that's only based on this month as I'm never particularly regular. And opk sticks don't work for me lol. Should I suggest 13, 14 and 15? Or 14, 15 and 16?

Also, how did you tell family, parents and friends? Did you explain to them from to start? Before you started TTC? Whilst trying? Upon getting your bfp? We didn't even know how to tell our families we were engaged! We don't talk about our relationship at all and nobody would ever expect it!

 

[Nimyra]

Lea, sounds good!

day_dreamer, I'd say just get donations on the 13th and 15th. You can add one on the 16th if you think you ovulated late. As for telling family, I think I told my mom and sis we were trying (we're close), but most other people I waited until I was pregnant to tell.

 

[Tegans Mama]

We didn't tell anyone we were trying with Tegan nor with our last pregnancy. Obviously they know we are probably trying now because of our loss last month. When I told my Mum I was pregnant with Tegan, she was shocked right to the core (In a good way) and Hayley's Mum didn't believe her! We explained about AI etc afterwards I think ttc is a very personal thing and I would NOT want people (Mum, sister etc) knowing I was trying and asking if I'm pregnant yet.

 

[RubyRainbows]

Oh Gina -- take it easy there! How scary! Hope the baby stays put a bit longer!

Topaz -- Callum is an early walker!! Lol... have fun! He's gonna keep you busy, busy!

Lea -- awesome news!

Day Dreamer -- i think any of those days/all of those days are good! All should be during peak fertility! That's awesome you are talking with a donor you like! And he's willing to donate 3X a month!

We have told a few close friends that we are actively TTC. And i have told my mom that we want to have a baby & are exploring options. I will fill her in more after pregnancy is achieved. I'm very close to my mom... i don't want to completely shock her with the news or lie to her like i did about my sexuality/coming out process. But i also don't think she needs to know all the details just yet. OH mentioned it to her one sister casually........ but wants it to be a complete shock after we get a BFP. So she is waiting to tell her family.... bc they will be quite surprised!!!!!!!

We are packing up & planning to drive to the hotel after work tomorrow. We will spend the night & meet the donor Tuesday morning. Starting to get excited!! FX'ed!!!

 

[topazicatzbet]

good luck ruby

day dreamer i agree any of those would be fine, i used to try and do 13,14,15 with ovulation on 15.

as for telling everyone, with callum think everyone knew, lol i have a big mouth when i comes to my own secrets (can keep anyone elses)
i discussed it with my mum and sister before trying as cos im on my own i rely on them a lot for support, this time only family and close friends knew. work are in for a shock given i ve only just gone back from mat leave.

afm. callum has really come on with his walking this weekend he is now covering about 2-3m on his own. i also have puppies that are starting to walk so its caos in my house, add in the fact that im tired all the time and have all day morning sickness, im ready for bed already and only just got up.

 

[snagglepat]

Daydreamer, my cycles were really irregular too so we would tell our donor approximately which week we'd need him but confirm nearer the time. OPKs don't work for me either so we based it purely on fertile mucus. When I had good EWCM, we'd inseminate. I could usually see it beginning to form a day or so before it got to it's heaviest so we'd have a day or two in which to plan and we'd just go for the two days when it was at it's best.

I know it doesn't help from a planning perspective but if we'd tried to plan ahead we could easily have been out by over a week so there was just no point, we just had to wait and see.

As for telling people, most people knew we were trying first time because we tried for so long and it became such a regular feature in our lives, so when we did finally conceive there was celebration all round. This time we'd mentioned we might try for a sibling at some point and I'd started taking metformin but it took a long while for me to respond and start ovulating so if anyone asked we just said we were waiting to try. Then we went and got pregnant straight away and hadn't mentioned to anyone we were trying yet so the announcement really was a surprise. I think I actually preferred it the first time because everyone was in pure celebration mode whereas this time they had some shock to get over as well and it didn't feel as though everyone was as joyous as we were. They came round though.

Topaz, I hope you manage to get some time to chill out a bit in between chasing small people and dogs. The morning sickness is a good sign though.

Best wishes to all,

Gina. x

 

[DaisyDoodles]

Congratulations Lea!!

And hang in there Ruby, your time will come and sooner rather than later I'm sure!

I've had an eventful if a rather scary few days... I was taken to hospital last Thursday after I started bleeding heavily, after waiting 2 hours to see the doctor I was examined and told they wouldn't know whether I'd lost the baby until the following morning when they could scan me but as I'd bled so much and there were clots as well the outlook wasn't good!

So we spent a sleepless night worrying ourselves silly, the poor sonographer had to deal with me sobbing my heart out while trying to reassure me that there was still hope and then we finally got to see a little heartbeat flickering away on the screen which had us both crying even more!!

They couldn't explain why I had bled except to say that it sometimes happens and that there was still an area of bleeding so it could happen again!

I had my first m/w appointment this morning and she didn't seem concerned about the bleed either, but she's referred me to a hundred and one other departments for tests and observations because my dad is diabetic, my son was a low birth weight and he's autistic (I don't see why that makes any difference but she seems to think it does!) and the list goes on and on.. I now have a list of appointments going right up until April, at this rate I might just as well book myself a room at the hospital!

 

[LunaBean]

Good luck Ruby!!!

We havnt really told anyone we're TTC, apart from OHs mum (when I was pregnant last week I showed her the digi and she burst into tears lol) and one of my friends knows. One of my sisters knows I was trying for awhile cus I used her house to meet the donor, but she thinks we've stopped. I wana wait til my 12 week scan (if I ever get that far!) to tell people. Tho I do jave my angels initials on the 'children' box on Facebook, and pics of my candles from the Babyloss Memorial Day, but no-one asks questions.

I text the donor there to see if he wants to help this month, but I'd be testing on Xmas Day, I duno if I could cope with BFN!

Oh, if anyone wants to add my to Facebook its Liz Oliver I need a few more TTC people on there! lol

 

[topazicatzbet]

glad all is ok daisy. my friend had a bleed early on and was convinced she had lost but he was still there hanging on she continued bleedng for a few weeks but now has a healthy 6 month old.

 

[LunaBean]

My sis bled quite abit with her 2nd too, and all was fine!!! Glad you saw the heartbeat!!!

 

[DaisyDoodles]

Thank you both.. everything you read says 'red' blood is bad so I completely panicked, but the hospital really don't seem concerned.

The only problem I have now is that my husband and parents have gone overboard with making me rest to the point where I can't move without being asked why and I still have 7 months to go!

 

[kezza78]

Sent you a friends request Luna xx

 

[LunaBean]

Got it!

Daisy, get all the rest you can, you'll crave it when the baby is born! lol

 

[RubyRainbows]

Daisy that is so scary! Glad you & baby bean are doing well! Praying for you both!

I have heard of women who bleed all thru their pregnancies & go on to have perfectly healthy babies!

Thinking of you! And enjoy the rest!!!

 

[LunaBean]

Ruby I love ur av pic! He looks soo cute!! Xmas cards been posted btw!

 

[EpdTTC]

Daisy-I'm glad things are ok! I've had quite a bit of spotting at different times in my pregnancy. Around 9-12 weeks I had a small bit of reddish blood and thought for sure things were over but they weren't. Turns out I had a small polyp on my cervix that was the culprit. Even now at over 23 weeks, I get brown spotting a couple of times a week. Doc doesn't seem concerned.

 

[Tegans Mama]

I bled quite a lot with Tegan, first at 6 weeks and then at 10. I got so upset both times but everything was fine

 

[RubyRainbows]

Ruby I love ur av pic! He looks soo cute!! Xmas cards been posted btw!

Thanks Luna!

So we met with the donor this morning... still no + on the OPKs tho! So frustrating trying to get timing right!

Plus, i left the syringe in for awhile after insem... but when i slowly pulled it out... seemed like everything came gushing out! Grrrr...!

 

[snagglepat]

Ruby, we always had leakage, no matter how long we left the syringe in for or how slowly we removed it. It still worked, Did your DP have EWCM?

Gina. x

 

[Tegans Mama]

Had a lot of leakage here too, everytime, and it still works x