Could someone tell me something positive please?

[charlieann]

I had negative comments from my family and OH's family when i started bf and the reasons they gave we rubbish (they wanted to look after him and couldnt, they didnt think he was getting enough, it would be better to get him into a routine with a bottle).
fortunately OH was very supportive and would always back me up/ argue with them for me. most have stopped with thier negativity/comments now as they can see he's thriving (although ive got some getting on at me to wean him now!)
i love it when i pick thomas up and he starts grinning at my boobs, the then girgles when i show him my bra and goes crazy rooting. im usually typing away while he feeds and dont notice him, if i look down and catch his eye he grins at me before carrying on. definately worth it for those moments!
ive learnt that if family wont listen to how i want to raise my child just blanking them when they tell me what to do they soon stop.

 

[mari72]

I have to admit that in the main my experience of bf has been mainly fab!! There are a few moments when confidence can dip but i think thats just being a new mum. My little girl latched on great from the word go and in that respect we've had no problems, my nipples have been painfree throughout. My little girl got thrush early on-i didn't so no problems there. My main concerns have been with supply but my boobs have always come through for me in the end, 6 months and 1 week later and we're still bf very happily. I'm not boasting here btw i'm just giving an example where there wasn't any major problems as they do happen. Plus there's all the other benefits-no sterilising, breast milk is free and on tap whenever(kind of), nothing calms a baby like a breast no matter whats wrong,the lovely serene moments when its just you and baby. I have to admit that for me ff was never an option, not because i have anything against it, i actually thought that women only used formula if they couldn't bf i didn't realise it was an informed choice. That makes me sound a bit sheltered doesn't it? I just hadn't really given it much thought i suppose

 

[kathykins]

Thank you so much everybody - I'm really overwhelmed. It's been driving me mad - my family, especially my Mum are really positive about it, but we live a really long way from them whereas my MIL is next door. She thinks bfing is selfish because it doesn't give anyone else time with the baby - she made me cry with that one, and she's forever comming up with excuses as to why I shouldn't even attempt it. This week's is that they'll keep me in hospital longer after the birth because LO won't be gaining weight. She's got me terrified about the whole business, so it's great to know there's support available on here!

I was bottle fed and had lots of allergies as a child (still have a few as an adult) plus asthma and crappy bones, so I really want to avoid that for Little Nick.

Thanks again - hopefully in about ten days I'll be a regular on here!

 

[beancounter]

Thank you so much everybody - I'm really overwhelmed. It's been driving me mad - my family, especially my Mum are really positive about it, but we live a really long way from them whereas my MIL is next door. She thinks bfing is selfish because it doesn't give anyone else time with the baby - she made me cry with that one, and she's forever comming up with excuses as to why I shouldn't even attempt it. This week's is that they'll keep me in hospital longer after the birth because LO won't be gaining weight. She's got me terrified about the whole business, so it's great to know there's support available on here!

I was bottle fed and had lots of allergies as a child (still have a few as an adult) plus asthma and crappy bones, so I really want to avoid that for Little Nick.

Thanks again - hopefully in about ten days I'll be a regular on here!

oh yeah, I forgot that plus- stops the MIL stealing the baby
whenever you want the baby back, you say 'oh, he wants feeding' - brill. They areunlikely tokeep you in hospital longer, its the NHS! They don't want you! Finn was quite ill (not related to BF i hasten to add) but was only in a week.

 

[Mervs Mum]

WTF?! I agree with BC, it's a great way of getting your baby back after they are being passed from pillar to post. Your MIL is being a selfish bitch!! She'd put HERSELF before the needs of her grandchild!! Your LO NEEDS the closeness of BFing to help them over the trauma of being born - it's not JUST about food!! YOUR baby will have spent all it's life right next to you, hearing you and being a part of you before being thrust out into a scary place. They will need the reassurance that you are still there and BFing also gives this.
Tell her SHE'S the selfish one. Why would she expect you not to give them the best possible start in life?
It's your baby hun. Your MIL has done her mothering. It's time to take a back seat and be grandma.

 

[amelia222]

I was in the hospital yesterday with Alice because she had been sick lately, turn out it is just a tummy bug but the doctor said the best medicine for her is breastmilk so I was already doing the best I could for her!

 

[JayleighAnn]

Same as all the other ladies have said, and it doesn't ruin your figure, I was back at my pre-preg weight in a week

The loveliest thing I find is that when I'm feeding, Halen rubs his feet down my arm and stares at my eyes and it's so lovely and close, it makes me feel all teary every time lol

Edit-My MIL tried the selfish bit with me and it didn't wash with me. I love taking him back from her arms and having him all to myself for half an hour before she grabs him off me to wind him and not give him back for 3 hours grrr

 

[CamoQueen]

BFing is great! It's such a positive, bonding experience. Nothing calms my LO down like a bit of booby; even if he's hysterical you can pop a nipple in his mouth and he's instantly blissed out! It definitely helped me lose the weight I gained; in fact, 8 1/2 months out I am over 30 lb lighter than I was before I got PG!!! Yes, I look better now than when I fell pregnant, thanks to BFing (it must be, 'cause I eat the same). And the happy looks they give you when feeding, it just melts your heart.

Oh, and the whole "I won't have any time with the baby" excuse is BULL. The baby doesn't feed every second of the day! Your MIL is just being super selfish; do what makes you happy!

 

[Shifter]

I love BFing! It's wonderful in every way. The first two weeks were hard, but they were so worth it! And some people just take to it like a duck to water, so don't fill your head with doubts about getting started because nothing is certain.

Your MIL is being a selfish cow. You will not be kept in hospital (for starters it is totally up to you when you leave, it isn't prison lol!), your MW and then HV will visit you at home to weigh baby and they expect a little weight loss at first as babies need to lose some of their weight so that they can adjust to their new diet.

How is it selfish to want to give your baby the best possible physical and emotional health?! The fact that it is also wonderful for us mums is secondary to the benefits for our babies, I'm sure we'd all agree.

 

[MandaAnda]

That about keeping you in the hospital is the biggest load of rubbish I've heard in ages. They try to get you out ASAP. I'm praying for a birth early in the day so that I don't even have to stay the night.

Every baby (even formula fed) is going to drop weight in the first 3-5 days before they start putting it on again. And no, breastfed babies don't gain weight as quickly as formula fed babies. But that's actually a good thing. Breastfed babies gain weight at a steadier, controlled rate and are less likely to have problems with obesity in the future. The growth charts in the red books at the moment are actually based on formula fed babies, which looks bad for breastfed babies at first. That's all being changed, as the NHS is planning on all growth charts to be breastfed baby based.

 

[Hope22]

I haven't been in this forum before now, but I'm getting quite close to my due date now and everything I read or hear about breastfeeding seems so negative, I thought I'd ask you ladies for your good experiences. My MIL (who lives next door to me) and all her family are really down on the idea - it hurts, it ruins your figure, you get infections etc etc and I'm sick of hearing it! Any advice would really be appreciated, because I really want to give it a go.

"It hurts" - for me it did hurt, at first, as my body got used to it. I made it through a difficult phase with sore cracked nipples (Lanolin cream saved me) and after that it didn't hurt one bit.

"It ruins your figure" - nonsense. Pregnancy hormones are what loosen the ligaments that hold breasts up; your boobs will fall a bit whether you BF or not. My figure is fuller than it was before I was pregnant, but cookies did that, not breastfeeding!

"You get infections" - sometimes, but this can happen either way - if you bottle feed, you have to go through engorgement and I'm sure some people get an infection then. I've never had an infection, and I know people who've had blocked ducts and mastitis and they still BF; antibiotics can fix even a bad infection fairly quickly.

I've had a bit of a hard time along the way, BFing hasn't been the easiest thing, but I'm SO glad I stuck with it. My LO is teething right now and nothing soothes him like nursing. When he's sick, unhappy, hungry, thirsty, or just wants to be close, I can offer him a breast and the look of comfort & happiness on his face makes all the initial discomfort and tough days worth it a thousand times over. There is nothing that compares to looking down at that beautiful face, and no feeling like being able to provide your child with nature's perfect nutrition.

If you choose to bottle feed, there's nothing at all wrong with that choice. I supplement my son occasionally because no matter what I do, I can't seem to keep up with his needs. I know moms who, for different reasons, couldn't BF and their children are healthy & beautiful. I just know that for me, it's really special to be able to BF my son and I'm incredibly glad I stuck it out. It's so easy and natural now, I plan to BF for as long as he wants, rather than stopping at 9 or 12 months as we had planned.

If you want a reason to at least try BFing, take a look through the BFing photos thread