***December Snowflakes 2012 Parenting***

[Kelly M]

Sigh, that article is so true! Everything take so much longer when you have kids.

Bean, my son was ebf and now just gets fruits, veggies and bm and we don't give any vit D. Our ped recommended it too but I don't see the need. He's growing so well, he gets sunlight, and I think my milk should have everything he needs. I've heard though, that you only need vit D for ebf babies and that formula has more vit D in it so you don't need to supplement.

 

[toothfairy29]

Hi ladies! I haven't had time to come on this last 2 wks so so much to catch up on.

I've had a tough couple of weeks. Hubby's been working 2 weeks solid nights. So have had to do everything for Joseph as well as try keep out of the house or quiet in the day so hubby can sleep. Had literally an hour access to my bedroom when neither of them was asleep in there. Has to think ahead and be super organised. Hats off to our single mum? Is it Kelly?

To add to it Joseph had been super demanding and grumpy. Just moaning and groaning unless I'm 100% attending to him. Typical man. I've been so tired and stressed.

Still no teeth and very slow progress with solids.

Will catch up properly soon when have more time.

Quick question. As its hot here his legs and feet are bare and I've noticed when he's held for a while in my arms (arm under his bum) his legs go blotchy and his feet go purple? They go back to normal within seconds of moving position. Is this normal??? I freaked out!!!

 

[Kelly M]

tooth, never noticed the blotchy and purple legs/feet thing. Weird! Maybe it's just his circulation being restricted in that position? Btw, I don't know who is a single mom on here but it isn't me. My dh is a super awesome daddy and I don't know how I'd do it without him! Hope you get some breaks soon and that your oh can get on a better work schedule. That sounds so tough!

 

[ImSoTired]

I've not had much time either Tooth. Cait is super needy, skipping naps, being cranky, and crawling all over. I'm exhausted. DH had also been working a ton (it's been 80-90 degrees here, 90 and above all this week) as he fixes air conditioning. I know we have at least one single mom here also but I'm not sure who...Chloe? Regardless single moms are amazing heroines! I cannot imagine doing what I've been doing every time DH is working at all hours. Especially now that Cait is moving so much and fighting naps. I've been running all over, skipping meals, not showering until mid afternoon, etc. I am falling apart here!

to all of those with sick and cranky babies and
Congrats to those of you whose babies are doing well and learning new skills.

Sigh that is a funny article! My reply would have been a bit more like...'That is the stupidest f*cking thing I've ever heard....' haha. That 'friend' must be an idiot if she really believes her friend is relaxing all day! Unbelievable!Myself and one of my friends are the only ones with children. The rest of my friends still get to go out to bars, etc and are always complaining about work, money, everything. If they only knew what I go through everyday, and I'm not even a working mom! Silliness...

Tooth I don't know about Joseph's blotchy legs. Maybe just a circulation thing? It couldn't hurt to mention it to the doctor, though it's probably nothing.

Again, sorry I can't respond more efficiently. I'm tired and my brain isn't really functioning.

Hope you are all well

 

[Beanonorder]

samj is the single mom. She hasn't been on in ages - I hope all is going well.

We had to take Amber for shots this morning and its the first time she's really cried. Dh refuses to hold her for shots or anything like that so its always me! I haven't minded so far because usually she doesn't cry or its just one quick cry and then its over. This morning she really bawled!

We gave her some finger food for the first time last night. Broccoli and sweet potato. She did really well! Every now and then she'd gag a bit and then promptly spit out the sweet potato in her mouth! What a mess though!!!

 

[expatttc]

Just read thru the past four pages as I need to sleeeeeeeeeeeeeep, though really wanted to catch up. Right, so I am also SICK of the sleep training. Rosa is now waking up every 3 hours, thank god instead of every 2, but each of those times she wants to nurse. At least now i'm getting longer periods, but it is still so tiring. Starting solids (purees of fruit/veg for breakfast and lunch) haven't made a difference in her sleep at all. She is varying between 2-3 naps per day depending on if she wakes up at 5.30/6 or 7.30/8...augh.
LOL...so sorry, I feel like all I have done for the past month is come on here to vent!! Not good.

Re. vitamin D, I was told to give it when in Canada and not exposing Rosa to much sun, but since moving down here to the tropics (still ebf, except for the solids from 6 months), was told by the doctor that it's not needed as long as she is getting a minimum of 2 bouts of 10 minutes every day in sunshine (on legs, arms, not face).

Re. biting - we go to baby group, and one mom always brought her toddler who liked to pull and bite the little ones. We just kept fielding off the hits and bites individually, and the mom didn't do anything -- until one of the local nannies picked up the little one, plunked her in the lap of the mom and said something along the lines of - "take care of your daughter"...the woman was quite flustered, yelled at the nanny and left....and hasn't been back since. Liiiiittle bit drastic, but I don't know what I would have done if I hadn't been able to stop her from biting Rosa. Certainly you're in your place to call for at least a time out...

LOL at the other LOs losing focus while breastfeeding. Rosa is exactly that way -- we also have to retreat upstairs and god forbid there's a light, a creaky noise, anything, that might distract her. Like it is right now to get her to finish I still have to change her from side to side like a ping pong ball...

We FINALLY got clearance for our transfer, so now have to just wait for visas. Yay! I want to find out what formula is available in Colombo (where we're heading) so that I can be ready to supplement...how much are you supposed to give, if you just want to add a bottle per day? We were thinking before bed, since it might help with the night feeding...

Sorry for those with coughs/colds -- we have something like a nosefrieda that we use after saline drops, and it works wonders. But often the drops are enough on their own, and Rosa will just sneeze out boogers as needed once we give them!

Oh....and Rosa is also uber-cranky. She hates being left to sit on her own and is trying to crawl, and though I hate to use this word -- she's whining. Quite a bit. It drove DH crazy this weekend...he kept asking what was wrong with her...I think just because he's not used to it...

 

[Chloe597]

I am not a single mom...was for a week when DH was out of town

Glad you are getting longer stretches, expatt, but it still sounds quite unpleasant waking that often. I hope the formula feed helps out. have you tried giving some rice or oatmeal for dinner? maybe that would help?

Anyone's LO starting to refuse solids? Gabby gets so excited when I put her in her high chair and then when the spoon comes to her, and then one taste and she wont open her mouth again! And it's stuff she used to like! But if i spread the purees on a piece of pita or a cracker, she eats it then. picky little child!

We went swimming for the first time over the weekend. G had fun! although every time i tried to lay her on her back in the water, both legs went straight to the sky. she wanted nothing to do with kicking. But she had fun in the wading pool with the water jets.

 

[sigh]

Chloe - Sort of! Ellie has been turning her head when I'm feeding her like she doesn't want it, but then when I get up to throw the food away she cries for it. Same thing during BFing... she is distracted and acts like she doesn't want to eat so I put it away and then she cries like she's STARVING. It's really frustrating esp since she started doing this at her feeding before bedtime the last few days. Yay for swimming! We need to take Ellie.

Expat - Hope things get better soon! I didn't know you were sleep training.. what are you doing? YES to the uber crankiness btw. I looked up the wonder weeks and I'm wondering if she's hitting her 26 week cranky period late (since she hasn't crawled yet). She wants to be held ALL the time... I tried the ergo and she wasn't having it... she wants my arms around her. hopefully it passes soon!

IST - LOL i was thinking the same thing. I have a friend who made a comment once when she was here - "This is so easy, I don't know what you're complaining about!" First of all I never complained to her, I just told her I couldn't come out because I have to take care of Ellie... almost told her off!! I hope Cait starts napping again soon! Ellie is back to her random short and long naps in the swing. I never know how long she's going to sleep but atleast she's sleeping.

Bean - we were giving Ellie vitamin d drops and stopped around the 3 month mark because I figured out that it was making her super gassy and giving her tummy troubles. I might try again since our dr said she needs it but I also try to mix some formula in her solids so she gets some vitamins.

Tooth - not sure about the blotchy-ness. Have you talked to his doctor?

We still are not rolling, not crawling, no teeth, still napping in the swing, still not on a schedule. I'm glad to know I'm not the only one not on a schedule... a few moms that I know were making me feel bad about it like its my fault she isn't. We hired someone to help T,W,Th while I work 3 days a week and she starts today. Nervous about having a random person in my house but hopefully it will work out. She is only available until September though so I'll have to find someone again after that

 

[ImSoTired]

Sorry Chloe...I knew it was someone in the US with a girl. I don't know why you popped in my head, lol.

Thanks sigh. I really hope Cait starts napping again. She's been fighting it since Saturday or Sunday. I let her cry for as long as I can stand it and obviously as long as she's not screaming...a cry and a scream are two different things to me. But she's been doing it longer and longer and I can't settle her so she just stays up. It wouldn't be so bad if she weren't cranky without that naps but she totally is. And she's back to waking once a night for a bottle between 1230 and 130 and going right back down so we have that going for us, lol.
Also sigh, I get that a lot from people, "you have such a good baby and you are lucky, you shouldn't complain"...Who's complaining? All I ever mention is that I'm a bit worn out, not saying I have a bad baby! And I love how my friends and relatives without children think it's so easy. They have no idea. hahaha

So we had a good ortho appt today and Cait had her X-ray. Her hips are perfect and she doesn't have to wear the harness anymore! yay! I'm so happy that is done and over with. I can't believe she wore it for so long! I just counted and she wore it for 24 weeks! 12 of them for full time! I'm so happy it's over and now we can go without it. We were also asked if we wanted to be on the news. The news station called our doctor and wanted to do a story about hip dysplasia in babies and they wanted to talk to parents who have used the harness. I am considering it but I'm really kind of nervous to be on tv, lol.

Also something odd happened at the appt. When we weighed Cait she had lost weight! I nearly panicked. She's down about a pound since a month ago but she's grown another inch. I told her ortho I was worried about it and considering calling the pediatrician. The ortho said it happens a lot when kids start crawling that they lose a little weight or plateau for a while. She said obviously if I want to call the ped to go ahead but it's probably just from her being so active and eating the same amount as always. I've not noticed her eating less and she hasn't been sick or anything!? I am still a bit worried about it and considering calling. I do feel better that the ortho said that though because she is a mother herself and she said it has happened to both of her children. Also she was in pediatrics before she was in pediatric orthopaedics. So I'm pretty nervous about it all. Has anyone heard of this before?

Well Cait is fighting her nap again and crying for me to come and get her. I hope you are all well!

 

[scoobydrlp]

Hooray for Cait being done with her harness! That must be such a relief after having to deal with it for so long. But well worth the trouble now that she has perfect hips! It is sort of scary to hear that she grew in length yet lost weight. I'm sure she's fine, but probably a shock just the same. Camden is thinning out some too, although still has plenty of chub on her. She also doesn't eat as much as she used to. She has her 6 month appt (late...) tomorrow so we'll see how her weight is. I don't think you should worry too much, but it might be worthy call to the pediatrician.

As far as refusing solids, I haven't spoon fed anything in ages, but I do sometimes try to put a taste of something in Camden's mouth if she's just playing with her food. She used to be fine with my help, but all of a sudden the last day or two she will have none of it! She clamps her mouth shut and fusses when I try. Maybe it's just them trying to show their independence?

Anyone else's LO swatting them away? If I try to wipe Camden's mouth or fix her hair or anything similar she gets both arms windmilling and swiping my hands away. I hate it! Sometimes I have to actually hold her arms down with one hand and do whatever I'm trying to do with the other. She's also starting to have little mini tantrums is she gets mad. Like when I wash her hair in the bathtub she gets so mad, she swats me away and then flails her arms around and splashes water everywhere. Definitely beginning to get her own opinions!

 

[Chloe597]

Has anyone started telling their LO 'No' or started trying to teach them not to do certain things? Gabby will grab mine and DH's faces really hard, and i don't want it to become a habit, but i don't think she is doing it to be mean. She will also gum my shoulder, and grab my hair, glasses, and earings. I don't want any of this to become a habit, but i don't know how to teach her to not do it. I will take her hand and unclamp it from my hair and tell her to be gentle and try to pet my head instead, but who knows if that is doing anything.

Scooby, she doesn't really swat at me, but if she doesnt want food or doesnt like something, she kinda grunts and makes weird noises, and will get squirmy. its great watching her develop an opinion, but frustrating when that opinion doesn't match mine!

IST, Happy Cait has perfect hips!!! She will love you for that when she is older. you prevented her from having lots of issues down the road keep us updated if you do call the Dr about her weight. G didn't gain nearly the weight i thought she should have by her 6 month appt, and was *only* in the 75th centile for weight (down from 90th at her 3 month). She is definitely slimming down, although she is still quite chubby. but her face has definition as opposed to just saggy cheeks now. I have heard about lots of babies either staying the same or thinning out once they become active, so hopefully its nothing.

 

[ImSoTired]

Thanks scooby. I did call Cait's pediatrician and he seems to think it's a mixture of the crawling and their scale being off (I couldn't believe he actually called me back because with all of my doctor's a nurse calls me). The scale they weighed her on was not a baby scale as this is an orthopaedic clinic not strictly for babies. He told me I could come in and have the nurses weigh her but he doesn't think it's anything to worry about especially because it wasn't a drastic loss, just over a lb (so I'm thinking maybe a few oz attributed to crawling and maybe a few because their scale wasn't calibrated properly?). I will be keeping an eye on her weight and eating habits though.

As far as tantrums Cait has been throwing them for weeks. If I take something off of her or move her away from something she throws herself backwards, cries, and kicks her legs. She will also swat my hands away if I'm brushing her hair, wiping her face, etc. But Cait still lets me feed her purees and help her get food into her mouth. She doesn't let me help with things she can get a good hold of but with the little fruit puffs she gets frustrated because her fine motor skills aren't up to par. We're working on that among other things.

Whoever said about the biting niece (was it Kelly?)...If she is in your care then I definitely think you should discipline her. If the mother is there than it should be up to her. It doesn't even have to be a time out at first but it could be a serious talk. Try to get the child's attention and explain that is NOT OK and it hurts. She wouldn't like a boo boo and neither does the baby.It may take some time but eventually the child will know what you mean. If she's doing it out of anger then help her put words to her emotions instead of actions, and if she just does it because then my guess is she is bored and needs more stimulation. I'm no expert but I did work with 1 and 2 year olds for a few years and this is how we were trained to deal with it. Obviously 2 year olds can be troublesome but none are really genuinely malicious. They do things because they don't have a big enough vocabulary to tell you whats really wrong or what they'd rather do. Biting isn't fun for the parents either and I understand completely but I wouldn't just let my child bite someone else's and not say anything to her especially if I were in the same room when the bite occurred! Discipline for a two year old doesn't work hours after the fact though, so if it was just you there, I'd say it was up to you. That's all my opinion though so I hope no one gets angry at me for saying that.

 

[ImSoTired]

Chloe I do the same as you. I say 'No' or 'That's not nice'....'Use nice hands' and I show her the right way or move her away from whatever I don't want her to touch. I think they will eventually get the point?

 

[Beanonorder]

Amber is also developing a bit of a temper. She gets quite upset when I take something away from her or don't get the spoon to her mouth soon enough! She is also doing the face grab and sqeeze & hair pulling - and man is it sore! I read that you shouldn't use the word no with them just yet because they don't understand it and using it now can make it less effective later on. But they do understand change in the tone of your voice so 'that's not nice', etc in a sterner voice is supposed to be a lot more effective. (although I can't say anything is having much effect on getting Amber to stop!!)

Expat great news for you guys! I'm still looking for a new job. We are hoping I can find something to start in January. I really want to get out of where we are now and back into real teaching!

I had a good laugh yesterday. I skyped with my mom and she told me that my (92 year old) grandfather is hell-bent on coming to China! He is missing his great-grandchild and wants to see her again!! There is no ways he would cope with things here but sweet that he misses Amber.

 

[ImSoTired]

That's sweet that your grandfather misses Amber, bean. 92 years old, wow!

Cait slept so soundly last night without her harness for the first time. She rolled right over on her stomach and slept without waking. I actually panicked when I woke up to check on her at 430 and woke her up but she had a quick bottle and went right back to sleep. I can only hope that she keeps sleeping as well as she did last night but I was so nervous that she was so quiet.

I hope you're all well

 

[Honey.Bee]

Hi everyone :wave:

Sigh - we are loosely using the 2,3,4 schedule. It's working for us. Roughly - Ava wakes around 6.45, has a first nap around 9am for 45-60 minutes, a second nap around 1.30 for 90 minutes or so and then bedtime is 7 pm. She is very routine driven and has pretty much found this herself. It's interesting because if her first nap is shorter (for whatever reason) she will catch it up in the second so she totals 2 1/4 hours! We had the early morning issue too, until transitioning to two naps. I loved those links, by the way! I too have to feed Ava away from all distractions. If I'm at home I go up to her room and close the door - only then does she concentrate!

Chloe - I do say 'no' and whether it is the tone of voice or the word, Ava will stop. She is a real hair grabber and a wind-miller! As for solids - I can't spoon feed Ava anymore. She bats my hand away or clamps her mouth shut and has been like this since 6/12. We've moved to BLW and she LOVES it. Maybe that's the way forward for you too?

IST - Great news on the perfect hips! Go for the tv item - be brave! Ava seemed to plateau with her weight and her shape has changed too. She is so active though so I'm not worried.
The last two weeks she has been eating lots more so her weight is back up.

Tooth - hang on in there! I'm sure a bit of separation anxiety is hitting us all. Sounds like a circulation issue for Joseph. I doubt it's anything to worry about but would mention it to your HV.

Bby - Wow that's lots of talking! Clever thing.

So, Im still mid sleep training here. Wow, it's exhausting. I tell you, my patience is being tested but we are finally making progress. We are down to two feeds now and Ava has almost got to settling herself although she still needs reassurance through the night. The good news is that we have moved from say 45 mins of rocking to perhaps just holding her hand or putting my hand on her shoulder. She's getting there and it's also translating to settling and self-soothing for naps. Last night I didn't need to pick her up, except for the feeds. My clever girl (better late than never). She is definitely sleeping better in her own room now she has got used to it and knows she hasn't been abandoned!

 

[sigh]

Honey - Yay Ava! Glad you're seeing some progress! Thanks again for the info btw

IST - Yay for no harness!! I wouldn't worry about the weight loss if the doctor isn't. She's growing so that's great!

Chloe - Yes we've started the NO thing in the last month. Doesn't seem to be working. lol

Bean - aww I wish your grandfather could come! That's so sweet.

Ellie is SUPER SUPER distracted this week and only nursing 5-10 minutes at a time (was 30 last week). I've tried everything and am worried that she isn't getting enough (only wetting maybe 4 diapers) and that my supply is going to go down. It's even affecting her bedtime and middle of the night feedings. She's also suddenly super clingy with me only and screams if I leave the room for a second, even if DH is with her. Going bonkers over here!!

 

[cococobain]

Bean - we were giving Ellie vitamin d drops and stopped around the 3 month mark because I figured out that it was making her super gassy and giving her tummy troubles. I might try again since our dr said she needs it but I also try to mix some formula in her solids so she gets some vitamins.

This! I told my ped that I thought the Vit D drops were making LO gassy and she said she had never heard of that and I was imagining things! I give it when I remember to... which I'll admit isn't often. She's out and about every day though and it's not like we live in Iceland.

Congrats IST and Cait! Yay no more harness! I bet when you knew of her hip dysplasia (sp) you never imagined such a mobile baby so early Just goes to show us mums worry over nothing

"No" doesn't work with Mia. She finds it funny and repeats the unwanted behaviour (like pulling hair). My pain is hilarious to her. A book once told me to yell "OW" if she bit me while nursing. So I did and she laughed. Then she went ahead and bit me again, this time with a huge smile on her face!

Mia still isn't sitting, I encourage it all the time but she just smiles and flops to her side. She has also begun rejecting solids and is super cranky, but no teeth to speak of. She went from having a self made routine to crappy naps/being tired ALL THE TIME. No interest in crawling either. Somedays I feel like I'm failing, but I know its just a part of parenting. So why do some mums have it all figured out then?

PS awesome progress with the sleep Honey.Bee! xx

 

[Honey.Bee]

Coco - Im not sure I know any Mum's who have it all figured out!
I used to stress that Ava wasn't rolling/sitting/insert milestone but then she did everything in the space of a week! I have friends with babies older than ours who aren't sitting yet. Just keep giving her the opportunity and she will all of a sudden get there. Do you have a bumbo type seat or highchair? I found that helpful. For crawling, I kept moving her toys out of reach so she had to move to get them. She was quite frustrated at first but then she worked out how to get them herself, even if it is more of a commando move rather than a 'Proper' crawl.

BTW how do babies bypass their toys and find the things in the room they shouldn't be playing with? Ava is drawn to the fire tongs and poker and also a piece of skirting board which has a gap down the back - perfect for trapping small fingers. Mummy fail on the baby proofing here!

 

[Kelly M]

Ist, yay for Cait's perfect hips! That's so exciting! Bet you guys are ready to burn that harness.

Chloe, I say no sometimes to Carter but usually I just grab his hand and redirect him or move my face away. He loves pulling hair, fish hooking me, grabbing my face and other babies' faces. I mostly take him and move him away and say something like "no you can't grab so and so you'll hurt them". Of course they won't understand it now but after saying it for a few months they'll start to get it.

Honey, glad Ava is starting to show some progress. It's rough so big hugs to you!

Sigh, Carter is getting more and more fussy about the breast lately. I've been having to rock him while standing to get him to latch and sometimes he doesn't want to feed in the morning when he wakes up. Today I had to pump because I was exploding and he wouldn't nurse. My dh said he wants solids instead and that made my heart hurt. He's starting to eat a lot of solid food and wanting to nurse less and less. He's also very distracted while nursing lately. Good thing is when we are out and about I can give him some solid foods instead if he won't nurse.

Expat, that is so sweet that your grandfather wants to see Amber so badly. Cute

Coco, with the sitting and crawling comes constant injuries and keeping them out of trouble so don't worry. I used to coach C to roll and crawl, etc. but I stopped doing that when I realized he's growing up too fast already and I wasn't really ready for him to be mobile anyway. I know many babies who didn't crawl until 10 months or skipped it all together. I know how it feels though when most other babies are doing something and you feel like yours should be too.

Oh and Honey, C has so many neat toys and he insists on playing with the electrical cords, the rocking chair (where he could pinch his fingers), the trash cans and the heating vents. I can only move so much out of the way before my house is just an empty space so I spend most of my time fishing him out of dangerous things all day. I miss my little baby that just stayed in one spot where I left him.