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Discussion in 'Trying To Conceive #1' started by pinksprinkles, May 31, 2011.
Oh wow! That's awful news! I would be devastated if DF told me we were going back to the WTT phase of this. It's like taking a giant step backwards. It seems like he has some good reasons of wanting to postpone it if you don't get that this cycle, but I think that you have a better reason to NOT postpone it. If all of that runs crazy in your family tree then you never really know when/if it will hit you... and why take the chance that it will happen while you're WTT for the year. Does he realize that most people end up getting by money-wise during moves etc, whereas health wise -- you are the one that nourishes that baby for 9 months and helps it grow, and there is only one you. So if your parts go, there goes your chances right?
Once again I am really sorry to hear about your situation, and for the sake of it I really, really, really, really, really, really, really, really hope you get a ginormous on/around June 13th!
Awe. That would be tough to do, even just saying it. Maybe you could try and negotiate... Let him know that you're really not pleased about having to put TTC on hold until he feels like its good. Relationships are work, and it shouldn't be one person over the other. I would tell my DF ((if he & I were in that situation)) that since I didn't want to pause it and he wanted to WTT for a year that we would be back to TTC after 6 mos. It's the middle ground, and that way some of what both people want is included. IMHO I think that you were right to tell him that, regardless of the amount you love him, if he didn't want what you NEED... then things wouldn't work.
I have never made any point of hiding how I felt about family and starting mine. When DF & I got together he was 18 & I was 19 and I told him that I always wanted to start my family young and I planned on it. About a year later we started TTC and he comes with me to all of my Dr appointments since it's been almost 15 mos and still no luck... just crazy cycles. He is even going to get a semen analysis done when I get blood work done.
If your SO loves you as much as you love him, he should go that little extra step for you like you would for him. It seems like he does want LOs, but in your situation you can't really risk WTT.
He is great, and what I find really helps is I don't have the 'I won't bother him with the details, I'll just make sure we do lots of BDing!' attitude. He knows what's what. I let him know when I read something that may help, and if I need him to try something, he knows I temp... The other morning I was moving around in bed and he was like 'What are you doing? ... Oh, temping.' It helps me know that I have his support, even though I know he is ok with us TTC, it's those other little things that help get me through the tough times && Thanks for the Babydust
I hope you get your this cycle. That would be awesome! That way you would have a double happy! You would get your bean && you wouldn't have to go back to that dreaded WTT!! I really hope things work out for you and your SO. Family seems to be really important to you, and you seem to really care for him!