Devastated after scan Update page 5

[MishC]

This is truly heart breaking! I'm so sorry to hear this news. I will be thinking of you tomorrow. x

 

[Alwilan]

I'm so sorry you are both going through this. I will be thinking of you tomorrow x

 

[lilmonkey86]

You will all be in my thoughts tomorrow! and may your sweet prince Oscar rest in peace! and may both of you find the love and support you both need from those you love and from each other!

 

[odouglass]

I am SO sorry to hear this! Praying for peace and comfort as you encounter tomorrow and every day thereafter!

 

[LuxAeterna]

Thank you all for your messages of support and condolence. I would like to clarify what happened to us during this period. I have enclosed it in a 'spoiler' to allow people to choose to read it or not.

Spoiler

We went for a routine 20 week scan on Friday, 30th May 2014.

At this scan we was informed that it was a boy (we asked to be informed) however something was wrong.

Oscar was diagnosed with Spina Bifida Myelomeningocele and we was referred to another hospital who had better equipment and a deeper scan ultrasound machine thing.

We had this scan on Monday, 2nd June 2014.

The scan confirmed the diagnosis of Spina Bifida Myelomeningocele however noted that the fluid on his brain was largely disproportionate to his spina bifida (SB Myelomeningocele causes fluid on the brain but the amount of fluid was too much for the amount of SB he had).

The fluid in his brain had increased over the weekend.

We was informed that in the "highly unlikely" case he would achieve pre GCSE ("high school") level of intelligence, and it was "highly likely" he would be completely mentally R-etarded. It was also likely he would not survive full term, and if he did, he would be so heavily brain damaged he would not know to breathe when he was born.

Furthermore, it was likely he would be paralysed from the waist down and completely incontinent.


This was the professional opinion of two separate consultants.


Therefore, we had no real option but to terminate the pregnancy at this stage.

As parents you have to do what is right for your child and it is our strong believe that this is the right thing to do for Oscar.


Therefore, tomorrow, Wednesday 4th June 2014, 'Pixiedust' will be induced and go into labour to deliver our darling little Prince Oscar.

Please pray for him, please pray for us, and for now I personally bid you farewell. We will be back in TTC when the time is right.


Thank you once again for your messages and support over the last 21 weeks.


'Mr. Dust'

Hi Mr. Dust. I'm so sorry for what the two of you are going through. My heart goes out to you both. Such a devastating experience to go through. If you haven't been informed already, please look into Now I Lay Me Down to Sleep. It is a great organization for parents going through this.

Many hugs to you both.

https://www.nowilaymedowntosleep.org/find-photographers/

 

[Carhar]

too precious for earth. My thoughts are with you xxx

 

[Yo_Yo]

Just so sad to read this in so sorry

 

[NotNic]

Mr. Dust I've just read all of your post. Thinking of all three of you this week. Take special care of each other xxx

 

[pinkribbon]

It broke my heart reading this. I can't imagine what you are going through sending you love.

 

[Lemonibug]

I'm so sorry for your loss xxx

 

[littlelegs91]

Thinking of u Hun z

 

[Selaphyna]

I'm praying for you both, and keeping you all in my thoughts.

 

[butterfly80]

I am truly sorry to read this devastating news. You will be in my thoughts, sending much love to you and your son Oscar x

 

[MummyToAmberx]

your in my thoughts xx

 

[SisterRose]

So sorry

 

[Fallacy]

Crying - thinking of you today. I'm so sorry this happened. There are no words.

 

[Nanninoo]

Thinking of you all at this sad time! X

 

[Tasha]

I am so sorry for you both.

I have had two stillbirths and there are many things I didnt do the first time that I wish I had and therefore the second time I had no regrets. I hope you dont mind me sharing some of those things with you, because whilst no one wants to think about them, no one wants to live a life full of regrets either. Obviously you may not want to do any of these things but lots of them I never even thought about the first time as the shock was immense.

With Honey (first stillbirth) I didnt have any photos of her, my husband and I (this was a huge regret of mine). I never looked at much of her just her hands and face really, I wished that I had seen her feet, her bum, her tummy, I wanted to know every part of her. I never took photos of her next to anything, it meant it was easy to forget just how tiny she was (Riley Rae, I took photos next to my hand so when ever I need to remember how small she was I only need look at my hand). I didnt know about taking two blankets the first time, one to wrap baby in whilst we spent time with her and then swap them over when it was time to say goodbye, she still stayed snuggley and I have a blanket that smells of my beautiful girl. There are more things but I think it might overwhelm you.

I will say that my time with Riley Rae was as perfect as it could of been and I am so grateful for that.

Please feel free to message me at any time, either of you. I will be thinking of you all and praying for you two as well as baby Oscar. I hope tomorrow is as gentle as it can be

 

[Yo_Yo]

Been thinking about you and your oh today. Sending you gentle hugs.

 

[vickyandchick]

Sending and thinking of you both today. xx