DH wants to get tested, who's done this?

[tigerlilly]

We have been trying for over a year and as you all know this is such a frustrating and emotional process and we really want some answers now so Dh has decided he wants to get his tested!

When SIL & BIL annouced they were pg in june/july DH's brother asked if he had his soliders tested as you might have issues because its taking us a while!

Dh only told me this the other day and admitted how upset and insulted he felt. Dh felt so angry because His brother weighs less than 8st and is 6ft tall, smokes, drinks and lives on chocolate, meat and potatos and hasn't eaten fruit or veg in 25 yrs.

On the other hand DH has done as much as he can to improve his health for TTC, he eats a vegtarian based diet, exercise, quit smoking and drinking well over a year ago. On the evening of the big pg announcment dh's dad be it, drunk made the comment " at least one of you can get it right!" and yet it took his parents a year to concieve DH!!! I don't think there's anything wrong with dh's swimmers but the reasurrance would be nice. I hope we haven't bitten off more then we can chew? Dh has an appt in two weeks with GP to ask about refferal as we assume it's easier and quicker to test the guy first, is this right? What was the process and how long did it take from start to results?

We're having a difficult day today as another BFN this month as a friend has told us that SIL said she thinks having the baby was a mistake and they should have waited a little while !!!!! WTF! FFS, why try? arghhhhh this makes me so angry espcially when they knew for quite a while, we were already trying! FIL had already told me that i had already really put her nose out of joint by annoucing we were trying and she was not happy but my mil wouldn't let him tell me what she said.

I and others have always wondered if she done just so spite me and push dh and i away from his family, ( this will be there first grandchild) as i have been pushed aside by the in laws since sil came on the scene many years ago, this really makes dh angry as mil seems to favour our BIL and SIL over us and her other DIL over her own son.! And they've not even asked us if we're pg since she found out sil was pg even when we all sit down talking about babies.

We did tell her 10 yrs ago we were thinking about starting a family and she was vile about it then and i can't see that her attude has changed (i was the same age as my SIL is now) and we were already living togther and been married for 3 yrs??????

thanks for listening ladies, sorry to go on and on about the same subjects xxx

 

[Mindy_mini]

Your poor dh having such insensitive family!

We haven't needed to get tested but I think he's going the right thing. I also think you should Both get checked out. It can't hurt can it. Plus I *think* if you don't it'll kinda confuse things if you do need to be refered for assistance (which I hope you won't)

Good luck with what ever you decide

 

[bdawn8403]

It is immensely quicker and cheaper to test the man first. All they have to do is get the goods in the cup, keep the cup close to their body and deliver to the place it goes to. I don't remember how long it took to get results but I remember it wasn't that long. I just had a followup SA ordered so since we're Ov BD'n this week will probably do it next week.

Good luck.

 

[Sommerfugl]

Sorry your OH's family are so insensitive.

My OH just got a SA done today.
I got blood tests done first but I don't see why the woman would have to go first, surely it could be done at the same time if you both go to see the doctor.
My doctor said that they're 'not concerned' unless a couple has been trying a year, but it can vary from place to place. It was all pretty easy to do, though. Simply blood tests for me, and then OH got to do his 'sample' at home and then take it into the hospital.
They said it'll be about a week before he can get his results.

 

[Jess137]

I had some tests on me first, but before going any further my doctor wanted DH to get a SA. Once that came back normal, I had more testing done for me. That way, if there is something wrong with either of you, the other is not going through unnecessary testing.

Sorry if I didn't explain that clearly!

 

[Jadeblue18]

My husband had SA a few months ago. His Dr referred him to the hospital. I helped him go and he delivered in a cup and then less than a week later he had the results. His motility was down a tiny bit but they put that down to the fact he used saliva. They wanted him to have another one to confirm that his spermies are ok but he's yet to go back in. It's hard for him to with the hours that he works BUT the results that he was given really weren't that bad at all so we just ride with it for now.

 

[mybabyluv3]

I know all too well how hard it is dealing with obnoxious in-laws who compare siblings and their spouses. Went through it for years with my ex and still being compared when we are not even together anymore and I am married. I feel for you, but please do not let them get to you or cause friction in your home. Do not give them the satisfaction of knowing they have gotten to you.

On another noted...my DH had 2 SA's this year. Each place and every doctor are different but his experience was pretty simple and pretty much the same going to two different places. The first time he went alone in a room while I got my exam. The 2nd time at a different place across the country they let me go in with him and help, lol. Both results came back that same day. One within hours the other minutes. Glad to say he had high numbers on both.
I hope it works out for you and your hubby. Some guys may be nervous or even embarrassed. Just reassure him that it is for a good cause and lots of guys go through it. It doesn't mean that there is something wrong with him.