DH & You Age Gaps

[Bittersweet]

There is 8 and a half years between me and oh. We will be wtt for probably at least another year or 2, oh would be 32-33. He used to want to be a dad before 30 but he's now not quite ready neither are we as a relationship.

 

[jren]

I am 3.5 months older. Being so close in age is wonderful because we are exactly on the same page when it comes to deciding when we want to start a family.

 

[MontyMad]

Seeing as I'm not dating anyone at the moment, I'll just talk about the age gaps with previous boyfriends. I've mostly have dates with guys who are around my age; a year younger or a year older than I am, but I prefer men who are a lot, lot, lot more older (Michael Palin? Yes thank you!!). My first boyfriend was 11 months older, we started dating at 16 & 17 and lasted for about a year.

I took a break from dating until I met a 26 year old online when I was 18. We had a little bit of an online romance for a while, but it was never serious as he didn't want to meet me in person. Oddly enough, he contacted me today. Maybe he wants me back? Lol in his dreams! And then my next boyfriend was nearly 16 years older than me at 36 while I was 20 & 21. My relationship with him was an odd one to say the least. We were very on & off as I always wanted to visit him in Manchester (I'm in London), but he always refused because he was in the middle of buying a house. Fair enough, but even after he procured his house, he still wouldn't let me go. So I'm thinking there was something fishy going on. But maybe that's just me being dramatic.

So far no one's been around long enough to be considered a boyfriend. Well...OK, there was somebody at uni, who was a year younger. But he's not important. Nowadays I'm looking for someone in their late 20s or early 30s.

 

[Nikoru0111]

There is 9 years and a few months between me and my hubby. I am 26 (27 next month) and he just turned 36, 2 months ago. For some reason it really doesn't feel like there is an age gap between us and I sometimes forget. He looks young for his age anyway. I probably could wait a few more years but my husband is nearing 40 now. Also my biological clock has kicked in and I go all gaga when I see a cute kid. We'll be ready in the next few months I think.

 

[spicyorange]

Dh is nearly 9yrs older than me, people think I'm young for a baby (27 so not really!) But we are both ready. I don't care to much about anyone else!

 

[aidensxmomma]

My OH and I are a little over a year apart in age. I'm 23 and he's 24. We are not at all on the same page about our long-term plans, but I think if our lives had been different before we got together, we would be. I have three children from my previous relationship, while he has none. Since I already have kids, I'm really impatient to have more, especially as my kids are getting older, but he's content waiting for a while still because he feels he's too young.

 

[Buttercup84]

My oh is a year younger than me, both august birthdays.

 

[Lozzielaula]

There are 8 years between OH and myself, so when we do get round to TTC at the start of 2015 he will be 33 and I will be 25. We havent really had many opinions on TTC from anyone really, they mostly just say if we feel we are ready then we should just get on with it!

 

[TwilightAgain]

I feel so pressured to get on with it as i'm 23 and my OH is 29 this weekend. I've obviously got plenty of time but i'd like to get going because of his age. The reason why I feel so pressured is because I know that we've still lots to do before we can even consider it (get engaged, married, finish uni, buy a house, find a job) it feels like it'll never happen.

I'd like to think 5 years at the latest but even that will put him at 34 which is older than what i'd like to be having a first baby. My Dad was 40 when I was 20 and i've loved having a young Dad. I also worry that we'll wait the 5 years and then it'll take forever to conceive. And also, I worry about his parents ages too (they're currently 51 and 59) but i'd like them to be around for a great while for our kids if you know what I mean? I don't have my Mum in my life but my Gran has pretty much been a Mum to me and she's 69, whilst she's in fairly good health, I don't take it for granted that she's here and would be devastated if she wasn't around to see me have kids.

So yeah, lots to worry about. It's so frustrating for us because we want it so bad but just can't anytime soon. I even want a quick vegas wedding so I can skip the long wedding stage

 

[littlesteph]

I'm 26 and hubby turns 25 next month. we have 2 little boys with an age gap of 51 weeks. I would like one more but hubby is pretty sure he doesn't want anymore

 

[LynAnne]

I'm 25 and my DH turns 25 next month. There is only a four month age gap between us both but I think it contributes to the fact that I'm ready to start TTC while he still feels too young. I know it's only four months but I've always been more mature whilst he very much acts his age!

There is no pressure on us "to get one with it". As silly as it sounds, I wouldn't mind the occasional comment even if it only gave DH a nudge in the right direction! None of my elder sisters have children yet and his sister didn't have her first until she was 27 so I think there is sort of unsaid opinion that we are still too young for kids. We got married this year and people even commented on how that was young - we've been together nine years!

 

[dani_tinks]

There's 22 years between hubby and I (27 me and 50 him) so we definitely had pressure on us!! I think when you're under 40 there really is no rush, just relax and enjoy your relationship x

 

[lcmorla]

That's weird. I've just turned 27 and my OH is 33. We're expecting our first child on April 18th and both our families are incredibly happy for us! No one is telling us I'm too young or that he is too old. That's definitely strange.

 

[wishuwerehere]

i'm 24 and hubby 29. i've been told i'm too young but most people we know think hubby is about the right age. whatever, the right age is when it's right for you, not anyone else!

 

[MollyMalone]

I'm 26 and DH 36. I was 19 when we met but had life all figured out (as you do ). Anyway, I always had this romantic idea in my head that I wanted children before the age of 25, just never thought it would happen. DH was 30 when we met, and he didnt think he would marry or have kids, but when we met he changed his mind haha.

He was ready to do the family thing from the get go, but I wanted to finish college before I got married. I suppose in a way he was worried about his age too, in terms of having the energy to play with his children, etc. After we got married I was all for having a family too though. So by the time we had our first I was 24 and he was 35. Now we are WTT for our second, but once again I have to finish college first haha

 

[BlueWater]

I'm 26 (nearly 27) and OH is 24. (2 and half years younger than me)
I'm at the stage where I'm seriously thinking of 'taking the next step' in our relationship from just dating. He's not quite there yet.
But then there's people younger than us who are married with kids <-- that frustrates me! Personally

 

[Emiloo]

I am 24 and OH is 25 and once we have a baby we should be roughly 26 and 27. Were looking to have 3 kids with a 2/3 year gap I guess? So we'd be 'done' between 30 and 33 ish? Think thats ok!

 

[Babyvoisey]

There is 3.5 years between me and OH he's 27 and I'm nearly 24. He's desperate for a baby before he's 30. Even now if he could. I would happily wait because I already have a little one. But who knows what's round the corner x

 

[MamaByrd]

There's a four year age gap between us. I'm 24 & he's 28. We both grew up in bigger, middle-to-high class cities. Me in San Diego, him in New York. I think that makes a difference in when people deem is the right time to settle down. For both of us, we grew up thinking you don't settle down until your thirties. Now, with us both being in the military where people seem to settle down very young, we feel like we're in the right age now. We're planning on getting married next year and TTC in two, putting us at 26 & 30 when we have the first.

 

[LucyLadyBug]

My oh1 is 23 (24 in feb), I'm 24 (25 in dec) and my oh2 is 28 (29 in may). I've always had it in my head about 26 being the right age for me to start having children. And now I'm getting closer to that age, I still feel like that in my heart but not sure exactly when things will pan out. Oh1 is just as ready as me (we celebrate 5years together at the end of october and we live together), but as a unit we've got other goals to reach first - repairing the house a bit, oh2 finding a job closer to us and moving in.

I don't think our ages are a problem, most of our friends are only just at the engagement and thinking about kids stage. Except for a couple who already have kids and I'm super jealous