Disappointing reactions to baby news

[MrsHouseWife]

I think I firstly need to state I love my in laws, they are the two people I respect most in the world (besides my husband) and they have always been extremely supportive of us.
So we were dying to tell them our exciting news, that we where expecting their first grandchild but when we finally did, it seemed to be the most unexciting, disappointing news they had had all year.
It instantly put a bad taste in my mouth, made me want to cry and gave me that over feeling that they where disappointed in us. Its also really upset my husband, who now feels like he has lost the respect of his dad, that he has worked so hard for in his adult life.

I have no idea where to go from here.

Has anyone else had anything similar happen?

 

[lilmor07]

yea my dad is disappointed too apparently, got me really upset and think people should think before they speak, we're carrying their grandchildren and dont need the added stress! xx

 

[Skywalker]

What horrible reactions! I'm sorry you all are going through that! My horrible reaction came at first from OH, but he has since chilled out about it (was a bit of a surprise so I can understand) I don't know how I would feel if the rest of his family reacted like yours and I'm so sorry your families aren't being more supportive! Have you talked to them about this and seen why they seem disappointed?

 

[LauraLoo1612]

I had this with my OH's grandparents, I thought they would be over the moon as its their first Grandchild but I think they seemed more shocked rather than anything... spec his Mum. She didn't seem to be "interested" in talking about it. They didn't say anything nasty... its just the vibe and impression that gave off. It really took me back too.

 

[AC1987]

I got that reaction from my dh all the times I've been pregnant. So now to me I don't even feel happy anymore It feels more of something I dread telling then something that should be happy news. I'm also worried about what my in laws reaction will be too..

 

[Pinklaladiva]

I told my Mum and her reaction was "oh right" and changed the subject..

My in-laws weren't extremely supportive in the beginning, but as soon as they saw the scan pics and bump grow they were more pleased. They adore my daughter now and can't do enough

Just takes time for the news to sink in. Congratulations xx

 

[HBGirl]

We are telling my in laws at 12 weeks. I am not excited.

 

[lilmor07]

My OH has been supportive albeit a little insensitive at times but he's started saying things like I cant wait etc.

I just cant believe my dad is so disappointed in me, Im 28!! and I have a steady relationship that we are getting married into, is all very upsetting but best not to think about it too much, I'm hopeful things will be less stressful when baby is here! my mum on the other hand calls me every day asking how me and whatever fruit I am that week are! Also worth noting my parents are still together, so very very odd! xx

 

[Helzy]

My OH's mom knew when we had our early scan at 7 + 2 and she's been really excited about it all the way through. My mom wasn't thrilled, but she understood that it was mine and OH's choice and whilst she isn't excited, she hasn't made any negative comments. My dad, however, blew his lid, is refusing to talk to me until i'm married, and wants to kill my OH. Apparently he still thinks i'm 14, not 24!! I know he's old fashioned, but my 4 siblings are all in long term relationships and have children (apart from one who can't conceive), so it's not like he hasn't been through this before.

 

[Skywalker]

What's with all the baby haters? Lol, I wish the people in our lives could be as happy about our news as we are! In time, I think a previous poster was right, sometimes it just takes time to sink in.

 

[Shandelion]

My family got interested afterwards. It's my first baby. My mother's reaction was "Oh, that's cool", then she kept talking about her swamp cooler for twenty minutes. My dad's reaction was "Aw, that's real nice sweetheart", with no further ado. It's my mom's fifth grand baby and my dad's first. I was so hurt by both reactions, or lack thereof.

 

[nolansmom]

Ahhh yep .. OH parents have been cruel and he is now not talking to them at all.. I anticipated something as they were in EU and I thought their return would create an issue of some kind.. Took 2 days and an hour alone with them but low and behold it's happened.

I can't imagine ever doing that to Ds and being unsupportive and controlling.. Ahh yeah I'm over it and feel kinda good about the whole thing (for lack of a better word) as I was waiting for it and VOILA!!! It happened, they are like clockwork..

 

[MissRhead]

My family have been fantastic even the ones I thought wouldn't be, but I have had bad reactions of everyone else who knows, it's never congratulations, it's well.. What are you going to do about it? Or just plain disappointment! It does get to you but when baby gets here it will be worth it all and we probably won't even remember xx

 

[pinkbump2011]

I am dreading telling a few people this time round. I've told my mum an she was shocked but happy for us. An my oh told his family who haven't said anything. But didn't expect anything more from them as they only have the time of day for their first grandchild x

 

[Flower15]

My Dad was disappointed when I was pregnant with DD. It really put a dampner on the pregnancy, so I know how you are feeling. But things did get better, you wouldnt believe he ever had negative thoughts about me being pregnant, now LO is here, he dotes on her, they have such an amazing bond, he is a brill grandad

Try and not worry or let it ruin your happiness. Pregnancy and new born days fly by, so dont waste them worrying how everyone else feels xx

 

[PandaMao]

My parents seem very disinterested in the whole thing and my dad almost seems disappointed. Not sure why. We've been married for almost 10 years so it's not like it's a big surprise. Plus, both of our families knew we've been trying for 2 years. I tried to show my ultrasound pics to my mother and she didn't even look at them and just said, "oh, that's nice." My parents already have two grandchildren from my sister, but why does that make my baby any less special? Luckily hubby's parents are completely over the moon as this is their first grandchild. My parents don't ever check on me to see how I'm doing but my mother in law always does. Family can be so awful sometimes.

 

[amless326]

Families really can be rough. My mother is only happy because my brother and his family moved out of state last year and she has no one to spoil. Makes me wonder if she would still be happy if they were still here. My boyfriends family was kind of in shock but they are really happy now and his mom is being awesome with me. It's their second grandbaby.. however his sister is acting really strange towards me. I get the feeling shes jealous and is somehow upset that maybe our baby will take some attention away from her 5 year old. Which is ridiculous! I havent told my father, he'd just have the reaction of "oh that's nice" as well. So, I don't really even see the bother. My sisters... were so excited when I told them 2 years ago my ex and I were TTC... when that never happened they were sad. Now that i'm with my current boyfriend.. they are just like.. "that's really soon..don't ya think?" yeah.. that's what I think too.. but it is what it is.. and I'm going to be happy about it. I wanted them to be excited.. over joyed that after 2+ years i'm finally pregnant.. and I'm with someone who loves me and we're happy.

People can be harsh... it's really sad that those people are family. Family is supposed to support and love unconditionally. I'm gonna give mine the benefit of the doubt because of my relationship situation.. but damn I just want people to be as happy about it as I am. I feel yeah ladies.

 

[CastawayBride]

Everyone was excited the first time around , however I don't know how everyone will feel this time as it has only been 2 months since the loss of our son. I know some will think it is too soon, others will just say stupid stuff. Sigh. I just tell my hubby that no one can make this decision for us and we did it with the input of our doctor.

 

[amless326]

Everyone was excited the first time around , however I don't know how everyone will feel this time as it has only been 2 months since the loss of our son. I know some will think it is too soon, others will just say stupid stuff. Sigh. I just tell my hubby that no one can make this decision for us and we did it with the input of our doctor.

First off I'm so sorry to hear about your loss everyone is going to have their own opinion about that situation. But people need to understand that you and your husband ... And your dr made the chose to continue making a family. No one else should have any say in the matter. With time everyone will see it your way :try to not let them bring ya down

 

[CastawayBride]

Everyone was excited the first time around , however I don't know how everyone will feel this time as it has only been 2 months since the loss of our son. I know some will think it is too soon, others will just say stupid stuff. Sigh. I just tell my hubby that no one can make this decision for us and we did it with the input of our doctor.

First off I'm so sorry to hear about your loss everyone is going to have their own opinion about that situation. But people need to understand that you and your husband ... And your dr made the chose to continue making a family. No one else should have any say in the matter. With time everyone will see it your way :try to not let them bring ya down

Thanks hun, I am quite content with our little miracle and everyone else can take a hike!