does anybody else feel like they are doing it alone?

Discussion in 'Teen Pregnancy' started by Beth_18, Oct 27, 2008.

  1. Beth_18

    Beth_18 Well-Known Member

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    i feel so alone at the min my mum n dad have been brill but i feel like my oh has relised he is going to have to settle down and i think that scares him as now he is starting to going out all the time and making exuses to see me. what makes it worse that im not working no more as i have sciatica, so im not going out very much as i find it hard 2 walk far. i feel like my oh doesnt want to know anymore iv tryed so hard with him and i love him to bits its just when i get a bit snappy insted of being understanding he will turn it round in to one big argument. he hasnt really been involed from the start hes came to the scans thats it. he didnt come with me to pick our push chair as he finds mothercare boring! he hasnt given me any money for the baby and he hasnt got anythink apart from a set of botties. when im feeling abit upset all i want is a cuddle but he just doesnt seem to want to know.
     
  2. AprilMum2009

    AprilMum2009 Well-Known Member

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    I soooo understand you!! I am in excactley the same boat! Apart from..i ended up splitting up with my OH, so now i totally am alone..But i only did it to try n shock him, but it obv didnt work!
    He came round my house a few weeks ago sayin he really wanted to make things work blablabla, n i agreed, but nowt eva came of it. And then on friday i found out he had been seeing some other girl!!! Ahhh it just makes you think...WHats wrong with me? lol!!
    I think you should have a talk with him tell him how you feel, thats what im going to do.
    But if your bf is anything like my ex, Its all words and no action!
    Seriousley try not to stress yourself out over it, Its not good for you or the baby!!
    Everything will work out in the end..trust me.
    If you eva need to speak to just pm, cos i know how ur feeling!
    Keep your chin up love,
    x x x x :hug:
     
  3. Ribeanaaa--x

    Ribeanaaa--x Guest

    Im doing on my self aswel babe, thankfully with the help of my brill family.

    My babys dad hasnt been there for me at all & neither has he's family, despite him going on about how much he wanted me to keep the baby when we found out i was pregnant.
    I didnt even speak to him for over 2 months, & during this time i was in & out of hospital with all sorts. We started speaking again recently & he did come to my 22 week scan, but now he's got another new girlfriend so dont want to no us again!

    And as for the siatica..OMG..how bloody painful! I had it from when i was about 10 weeks untill about 16...& its just started coming back in the last couple of weeks after a car crash! Ive honestly never had pain like it!

    But i no its easy to say but keep your chin up. When i dont contact my babys dad he starts doing pathetic things to try & get me to ring him & trys starting rows. I think they just find it harder to deal with than us girls. I meen he told me only last week that he wants nothing to do with our baby when shes born, but then the next day told a friend of mine he was taking me to court because ive told him he cant see our daughter when shes born? So he noes that his behaviour looks terrible, so he trys & makes out im the bad 1.
    You just gotta let them get on with it & get it out there system.
    Its going to hurt him more seeing that you & your baby dont need him & you can do brilliant on your own.

    Sorry if ive waffled on abit...just i no exactly how your feeling! But keep smiling chick otherwise your have a moany baby! Lol..

    xxxx
     
  4. Its a well known fact men are shit. My OH talked about helping me out and looking after me, Im 23 weeks now and Im still waiting to be looked after. I do EVERYTHING in the house and walk the dog and cook his meals. He does fuck all, he doesnt work either hes at uni 12 hours a week. Im feeling really emotional at the min and end up crying all the time from stress and exhaustion and I just get told Im a baby and/or shut up. Im praying for a miracle otherwise Im going to have two babies to look after in 16 weeks time!
     
  5. Beth_18

    Beth_18 Well-Known Member

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    thankyou! i think my bf needs a good shock but it wont change it will go back to how it was. i will never understand lads, its not like you climb on top of your self and make a baby lol
    x x x
     
  6. Beth_18

    Beth_18 Well-Known Member

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    i get very tearfull at the min to and my bf always says im just trying to make him feel sorry for me. im just waiting for him to turn round n say he doesnt want to be with me anymore. he wanted this baby just as much as me and now im left feelin alone i could kick him sometimes to try and knock some sence into the lad lol
    xoxo
     
  7. elly460

    elly460 Well-Known Member

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    We're you two TTC and he's being a jackass? Or was it unplanned? I really hope he grows some balls and steps up to the plate. hugs
     
  8. Beth_18

    Beth_18 Well-Known Member

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    it was unplaned but before i fell pregnant he use 2 always go on about how much he wanted a baby so i dnt get him at all
     
  9. junebug17

    junebug17 Guest

    Aw well sweetie im sooo sorry. HUGS: i hope that he comes around and acts like a real man. :)
     
  10. AprilMum2009

    AprilMum2009 Well-Known Member

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    thankyou! i think my bf needs a good shock but it wont change it will go back to how it was. i will never understand lads, its not like you climb on top of your self and make a baby lol
    x x x[/QUOTE]

    LMAO!!!:rofl:

    And as for kicking him, i wouldnt bother, my brother broke my ex's nose at the weekend for the way he's been treating me|!LMAO! but it didnt change a thing!!! x x x x
     
  11. PrettyBonk

    PrettyBonk Alex,Abigail,&Grace's mom

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    Have you told him how you felt hun? in a nice calmed way???? try talking about it...

    guys are weird about things like this...maybe he thinks he has to get it out of his system before baby comes...even thought his social life won't be over...I know of dads that weren't too involved in the whole pregnancy and when they saw the baby for the first time everything changed
    ...remember the baby is growing in you...you love the baby first, from day one (we even love our babies way before we get pregnant). A lot of daddies don't realize how important and beautiful it is until they see the baby for the first time.
     
  12. dizzy65

    dizzy65 Momma of my 4 Boys!

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    :hugs: awe i hope all is well :hug:
     
  13. Kris0309

    Kris0309 Well-Known Member

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    I know how you feel . My now ex bf wanted me to keep the baby then when i was 3 months pregnant he left me to try with his ex gf again. now im 5 months and he comes in and out my life sayign he loves me and then the next minute he wants nothing to do with me. And says he wants to be part of my babys life and then he wrote.he wont help me buy anything until the baby is born and he wants nothing to do with our little boy. so ya my ex is really messed up in the head. But hey its his loss cause in 4 month i will have my little boy.
    Your oh is missing out on all the special moments. Guys will never grow up whether there 16 or 50. So keep your head up and worry about your LO. im sure he will come around and if not you have your baby who will love u nomatter what
     
  14. TheyCallMe...

    TheyCallMe... Pregnant-3rd Tri TeamPink

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    i am exaclty the same i totally understnad only my BF is really wierd. Like hello! my hormones are everywere so im always feelin differnet as for him when i yell at him he yells back wen i cry he yells , when im too happy he yells and asks why am i so happy.

    before i was he REALLY wanted a baby but now he seems so distant even though he's right there.

    and when we joke around he keeps mentionin the fact he told me to have an abortion but when we get serius and i mention it he says i dont no hwo to take a joke and obviusly he was joking as we were "jokin around" but NO!!! that is not a joke.

    then hay that turns in to another argument.
     
  15. tasha41

    tasha41 Mum & Dad + 1

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    i know how you feel, my boyfriend has been amazing but he rarely talks about the baby/pregnancy anymore unless i or someone else brings it up. for the first month or so it was all we'd talk about but now it's just back to normal sorta.. he spends lots of time with me but it bothers me that i have this inescapable maternal instinct and he has yet to develop the same thought pattern, etc. i understand that men usually don't develop that until the baby is here and they're holding it for the first time but mannnn do i ever feel alone!!

    my parents have been great too but sometimes they just drive me crazy with their expectations for how many hours i will work and how much i will go to school/how well i will do and the housework i will complete after it all.. it's hard! i definitely feel for all the girls in school and working during their pregnancies, you're all amazing :)
     
  16. Beth_18

    Beth_18 Well-Known Member

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    men i dont think they will ever change n grow up. i think some times i would be better off alone but the others i feel i love him so much and cant live without him!!

    is always the same you cant live with them and you cant live without them
    x x
     
  17. Sarah-Jane

    Sarah-Jane Mummy to 3 boys :)

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    It's unbelievable how much you sound like me hun! lol
    My boyfriend is exactly the same, we've been together a year n a half and now I'm pregnant, everything's changed. We were always together at one point but then he started uni so I only see him at weekends now but with his mates so we never have any 'quality time' together.
    He hasn't put a penny towards our unborn son yet, although he's enjoying himself by buying himself concert tickets, going out and allsorts then claims he's too skint to pay anything towards our baby!
    When he's at uni (he lives there) I barely hear anything off him. When he first started, I used to get a few phone calls a day and loads of texts... now I get like a text or two if I'm lucky, makes me wonder all kinds of things but I know it's just my hormones.
    Everytime I get emotional, he goes in a mood coz he thinks he's done something wrong and I'm not telling him... he doesn't realise that I get upset at the mo for absolutely no reason!
    That's men for ya though hun... they all need to learn to grow up but hey... miracles don't happen over night do they? Shame really haha!
    Wow, I've just realised... we're due on the same day too :D hehe
    PM me if you ever need a chat hun (even if you just want a rant about men :p lol)
    xxxx
     

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