Does anyone else hate facebook announcements and updates?

[beanz]

you can change your privacy settings so people can't see things you post, though I know this can be tricky as they will be aware you've done it.

the SIL thing sounds tough.

 

[Starbright]

Out of interest, who here if they get pregnant will be open on Facebook about how it happened? If I get pregnant I will be open about the fact that it was through IVF etc because I know it's not easy for 25% or more of the population.

I have just 'come out' to some of my closest friends about starting infertility tests and probably needing IVF, but I don't think I'd discuss it on Facebook. There are too many 'friends' that are really more like acquaintances, plus some work colleagues that I do NOT want to know. But .. if I get a bfp, I might change my mind and be more open about how it happened. It can be uplifiting (for me personally) to hear success stories of other long-term people.

To the original poster - I know exaclty how you feel - happy and sad at the same time. It's very conflicting, but totally understandable given what you're going through. Don't feel bad for feeling this way. Good luck to you getting your bfp

 

[a_missy]

Iril - i cant believe she let you pour your heart out like that knowing how it would make you feel when you found out, that seems uncalled for, she should have either changed the subject or just told you the truth.

Yep, she shouldn't have pretended they were LTTTC at all. I met her bf a while after, and he said they'd gotten the BFP on their first cycle TTC and I found out a little later they'd only been together 5 months before she got pregnant, so there's no way she was honest.

wow! i didnt realise she'd actually lied about LTTTC thats bloody horrible! i thought you meant she just went through the entire convo when she knew she was pregnant but to just lie about it.... what the hell? shes either really stupid or a total bitch! haha

 

[Frindabelle]

Hey ladies I hate it too

I have literally aboutu 5 or 6 preggers ladies on FB, a couple of which are lovely ladies and I'm sooo happy for them but it makes me sad too
xx

 

[Frindabelle]

.... Reading your post has really made me giggle as I got myself into trouble last week on facebook and have been blocked by two "friends" because of my outspoken'ness!!

You are certainly not the only one. Not only is it "the pregnant" that annoy me but also the ones that have children and do nothing but moan. So, whilst suffering the serious affects of PMT and another failed month of TTC, I was sat reading the posts on facebook about how one friend cannot do anything because she is pregnant and another moaning about her two very young children so i decided to post into my status.... "is sick and tired of having to listen to people constantly moaning about their lives, children and pregnancies. Shut up and be grateful for what you have got ... things could be a lot worse"!!

Oops.... Probably not the best of moves but I think sometimes people take their children/pregnancies for granted. The majority of us who post here would love the chance to moan because they haven't had enough sleep!

Rant over!!!

Baby dust to all xxx

I need you on my fb! that really made me laugh I need to be more like that

 

[louis]

Hi everyone I feel totally the same, someone on facebook has just announced they are pregnant (not been ttc for very long) and her status updates are all pregnancy related aaaarrrgggh! I am having a hard month this month I try not to be bitter but cant help it and am coming to the end of my cycle so AF is very close (I can feel it) so will be onto my third round of clomid baby dust to everyone louis x

 

[Iril]

Iril - i cant believe she let you pour your heart out like that knowing how it would make you feel when you found out, that seems uncalled for, she should have either changed the subject or just told you the truth.

Yep, she shouldn't have pretended they were LTTTC at all. I met her bf a while after, and he said they'd gotten the BFP on their first cycle TTC and I found out a little later they'd only been together 5 months before she got pregnant, so there's no way she was honest.

wow! i didnt realise she'd actually lied about LTTTC thats bloody horrible! i thought you meant she just went through the entire convo when she knew she was pregnant but to just lie about it.... what the hell? shes either really stupid or a total bitch! haha

She used to be so cool, but the last years, she's turned into such an attention whore!

 

[Aphrodite]

Hm, had a mass text and FB Update today of someone else whos pregnant. I felt very tearful and spent the afternoon watching DVDs and ice cream, so much for being chilled, it really got to me today

 

[fluffystar]

Oh my goodness!!! I never expected such a response when I started this thread!

Its so comforting to know that so many of us on here feel the same way and I really liked the comment that we are hiding pregnant friends to "save our hearts". However, I too then find myself secretly stalking them to read all of their updates. Its like an addiction. Weird isnt it!

I have really thought hard about how I would feel if, sorry WHEN, I eventually do get a BFP and whether I would post it on facebook. At the moment i know I would be over the moon but feel like it would be my own little victory and my secret so I would keep quiet.

I know that it worries me how people may react if they too are LTTTC and I didnt realise. We had a chemical preg in Jan and whilst I was sooo happy for all of 2 weeks, I was really worried about how we would tell my sister in law as she has had a failed attempt at IVF and their area only pays for 1 attempt. I have since had a chat with her and the subject came up so she knows that we have also been trying for a while. It sort of made the thought of telling her we are pregnant a little easier as she would know that it also didnt come easy for us. Anyway, I am, of course, worrying about nothing as we arent pregnant anyway! Oh to live in the fantasy world in my head!!

 

[Blue12]

I honestly do the same, I hate reading about pregnancies, babies and all that it feels like I can't have..

A while back, I had a chat with a friend from high school, and she asked if any babies were on our way or something like that, and I said no. She started talking about how they've been TTC for over a year. So I opened up and shared that we've been too. Then two days later, she posted in her news feed that she was 12 weeks pregnant.

I understand that people want to keep it a secret until second trimester, but still I felt like she had lied to me and tricked me into telling her something I wouldn't have told her if I knew we weren't in "the same boat".

Got me so upset I deleted her as a friend and haven't talked to her since..

Oh hun that is just devastating.......... I hate that for you.......

 

[Blue12]

Oh I have to add - my brothers fiance (who got pg after being together 5 months- and getting pg the first month) thinks that she understands what I am going through - cause growing up she always thought she would have trouble ------------ right just like me - and therefore I should be able to handle her news and every little update. Of course as she is family - I cannot block her................the baby is now 3 mos old...

 

[fluffystar]

Oh Blue12 honey, they just dont get it do they xx

 

[Sherri81]

I currently have about 40 people hidden on my facebook page. And I didn't feel guilty for hiding a single one of them!

I've lost 5 pregnancies so far, and had one micro preemie. I have been through my Clomid hell, and been told there is no reason for the losses but that I should buy a book called 'Coming to Terms,' to help me get through my 'issues.' I couldn't handle one more update... 'and baby makes 5!' 'someone has something in the oven....' etc etc.... It was getting rediculous. I literally had 10 people in one day come on and talk about how they just found out they were pregnant 'like totally on accident!' Hid, hid, hid... I hid them all!

I will say this though, although I don't think its fair that so many people just 'happen' to fall pregnant so easily, I don't begrudge them anything. And the day I got my positive HPT on March 31st, I went right on Facebook and announced it to everyone!

I did however make sure to add that this is my 7th pregnancy and that we are asking for prayers that it sticks. I am making no bones about it that this may not stick, and that I went through hell to get it, and that I am now doing daily heparin injections to try and save it.

I will also have no problems telling people if something happens. I am just so sick and tired of hiding everything from everyone! To hell with it, everyone else on Facebook can know my struggles too, since I know everything about their huge bellies, their 3rd pregnancies despite being severe diabetics, their accidents etc etc...

For me, it helped alot to be able to come clean in my status about my situation. I haven't done anything wrong in being reproductively challenged, so I refuse to hide it anymore.

I am also glad to see though that I wasn't the only one who went 'hide happy' on preggo people on Facebook.

 

[PrincessC]

X

 

[fifi-folle]

Sherri, your post made me feel so much better about hiding the pregnant women I am friends with on Facebook, today was the last straw, yet another three month scan and people congratulating them, I couldn't take it so hid her and several others, then DH said I should just be happy for them, oooh that's was so the wrong thing to say, cue me sobbing and storming out the room, crying for 2 hours whilst telling him how useless I am. All because of some girl I went to uni with posting a scan pic. Tempted to stop using FB but not quite there yet. The only problem with hiding people is that it doesn't stop the next scan pic upsetting me.

 

[genkigemini]

Soooo true.
I have several FB friends that are pregnant right now, and I can't really blame them for posting pregnancy related things.... it still hurts to see it though

I am one of chefamy1122's friends that posted her entire pregnancy on FB BUT before I got pregnant and I was LTTTC, I would BAWL every time someone had an announcement because I thought I would NEVER be there. I understand that this does not help one little bit now but try to remember that when you all DO get that illusive , it will be your turn and more than likely you will be way to excited not to post as they do.

I send you all TONS of

 

[mamawannabe]

.... Reading your post has really made me giggle as I got myself into trouble last week on facebook and have been blocked by two "friends" because of my outspoken'ness!!

You are certainly not the only one. Not only is it "the pregnant" that annoy me but also the ones that have children and do nothing but moan. So, whilst suffering the serious affects of PMT and another failed month of TTC, I was sat reading the posts on facebook about how one friend cannot do anything because she is pregnant and another moaning about her two very young children so i decided to post into my status.... "is sick and tired of having to listen to people constantly moaning about their lives, children and pregnancies. Shut up and be grateful for what you have got ... things could be a lot worse"!!

Oops.... Probably not the best of moves but I think sometimes people take their children/pregnancies for granted. The majority of us who post here would love the chance to moan because they haven't had enough sleep!

Rant over!!!

Baby dust to all xxx

I need you on my fb! that really made me laugh I need to be more like that

Ha ha.. I wouldn't recommend it as it did get me into quite a bit of trouble with friends!! I think sometimes though the whole TTC thing can just get on top of you so much and it just takes one little thing, such as a post on facebook about a pregnancy to ignite that fuse and make you explode... I just happend to do it rather publicly!!! Hey ho

 

[Zipp]

Yip, I think probably most of us girls on here have felt like that at some time.
I tend to be very uncharitable have a bitch Then go into denial, denial, denial. xx

 

[BabyChristie]

Just wanted to say I feel exactly the same way. I have hidden quite a few friends' statuses - in fact I actually have a rule for it now: two strikes and you are out. I can cope with one announcement - it's upsetting and something I can only dream of - but if they post again with their symptoms or scan pics, I know its not going to stop so I hide. Same when the babies come along - one announcement is fine, but loads of baby photos? You're hidden!

I don't do this to really close friends though as I'm usually genuinely happy for them, its just those 'acquaintances' - like my best friend's 16 year old step-daughter for instance who has just had her little boy after constantly wingeing about her symptoms on Facebook. Then all her other 16 year old pregnant friends would comment on her status about how they were sick of being pregnant too. Not good for my blood pressure - HIDE!!!!

 

[dizzikel]

My younger sister has two kids already, just left her older partner and is now homeless living with my mum. She has not job, no house and I have just found out she is expecting again. She put her scan picture on FB two days ago....how F*****g insensitive! She knows we have beeen trying for three years!