Doing the Deed ???

Discussion in 'Postnatal Support' started by iwantabub, Jun 11, 2013.

  1. iwantabub

    iwantabub Well-Known Member

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    Just wanted to get some opinions...

    Firstly I am 2 weeks post section and my bleeding hasn't completely stopped yet but I feel totally fine... Can I dtd yet?

    But more to the point bubs sleeps in his Moses basket in our room... If he's fast asleep it's ok to dtd right?

    Like he's too little to know what's going on... It's not weird ... Like he can't see over the sides of the basket or anything even if he woke up lol...

    Do u ladies who have bubs in the room with u dtd? How does it work when u co sleep?

    It's morally ok right?

    Sounds crazy but I just don't wanna scar my bubs hahaha
     
  2. Lady H

    Lady H Mum to a miracle

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    Firstly congrats! Secondly you can DTD when you feel ready. There's not set time to abstain and you know your body well enough.

    I don't think baby will be any the wiser if you DTD with him there! It's probably less disturbing that DTD when you were pregnant with him! Enjoy it.
     
  3. randomrach

    randomrach Well-Known Member

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    No, I didn't dtd 2 weeks PP. I didn't have a section but I had stitches that weren't healed up by then.

    I wouldn't dtd while baby was awake but once she's asleep she's. not going to know the difference so don't see why sharing a room would make a difference x
     
  4. beanzz

    beanzz Mama to 2

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    They suggest 6 weeks pp but I don't know if its the same for after a section. If you feel ready then go ahead :)

    I've co slept with LO since birth and still do, me and OH have sex in the lounge :haha:

    I'd say its okay to though, LO isn't going to know what you're up to, will just have to keep the noise level to a minimum :p
     
  5. RoxieHart

    RoxieHart Baking #2

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    So of topic, but I love the quilt (I think it is) that your LO is sleeping on in the pic! Xx
     
  6. iwantabub

    iwantabub Well-Known Member

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    Thanks Hun. :)
    . My auntie made it for Hudson... It's got all patchwork on it of dinosaurs and animals and cars and all sorts ... Then on the back it has a patch that says Hudson and his birthdate and made with love etc... It is gorgeous :)
     
  7. RoxieHart

    RoxieHart Baking #2

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    Aw that is so lovely ! I really want to make one! Xx
     
  8. Butterfly89

    Butterfly89 Mama of 1

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    I would wait!! You need to wait for the bleeding to stop because bleeding = open wound in the uterus. Even with a section, your cervix is still open so that risks getting bacteria into the uterus. As well as possibly harming the external incision. I know everyone has different opinions on this issue, but I feel like waiting the recommended 6 weeks (or 8 for a section where I live) really helped my healing and things were pretty much normal by 6 weeks.

    As for being weird around LO, at first it was for us but we realized he had NO idea and just slept through it all, lol. Now he is across the room and can't see us so it's a little better. I won't lie though... one time he woke up from a nap in his swing and was staring RIGHT at us in a compromising position, haha. I felt like a weirdo. But I doubt he'll remember anything from three months old, lol. But I'll definitely be more careful from now on.
     
  9. iwantabub

    iwantabub Well-Known Member

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    Thanks for you opinion... my doc said they say 6 weeks but whenever i feel comfortable it is ok... i just wasnt sure wheather i had to wait for bleeding to stop... dh has to "cover up" anyway lol so would that stop infection when we do dtd?
     
  10. rebeccalouise

    rebeccalouise Well-Known Member

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    we first DTD at 4 weeks pp, it wasn't very enjoyable but I think that was because I was scared more than anything, it didn't really hurt. It wasn't even meant to happen, we planned to wait until 6 weeks but one thing led to another! :haha:
    I'd say just do it whenever you feel ready.
     
  11. kissesandhugs

    kissesandhugs Momma to Isaiah and Nova

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    I waited until 6 weeks although I felt fine bc I just wasn't up for it. But even after 6 weeks it was very very uncomfortable and still painful. It was actually like that for a bit :/ OH and I DTD while LO is in the same room but sleeping, just have to be quiet lol
     
  12. GreyGirl

    GreyGirl Pregnant with no2!

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    I waited til about 6 weeks PP because of stitches. We had LO in a side crib and when she was asleep we dtd in the bed, I think it's morally fine because she's asleep and doesn't know. I wouldn't do it if she was awake and looking at us!
    I'd say do it when you're ready and take it easy :)
     
  13. MrsSmartie

    MrsSmartie Mum to 1 and NTNP for #2

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    We did it 6 days after DS was born and I had him vaginally (I don't know why I wanted to, hormones I guess! It was fine. The blood loss is not from your scar wound, everyone has bleeding after borth. Whenever you feel ready is fine and just be gentle, most of the people I know who had a c/s still felt that it was uncomfy for a while after.
     
  14. patch2006uk

    patch2006uk Well-Known Member

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    The bleeding isn't from the scar wound, it's from the wound where the placenta was attached. If you're still actively bleeding, then your uterus isn't healed and is an open wound. I personally would wait until the lochia has stopped at least.
     
  15. sg2011

    sg2011 Well-Known Member

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    I agree about waiting and frankly, I don't see what the rush is. There are other "outside" things you can do for each other that doesn't involve penetration so soon after a c-section. I had a c-section and didn't have sex until 6 weeks pp when my bleeding had stopped. Yes, I wanted to earlier but it was more important for my body to fully heal.
     
  16. MrsSmartie

    MrsSmartie Mum to 1 and NTNP for #2

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    The bleeding is from the uterus lining shedding, just like a period but longer as there was much more of it, no open wounds from the placenta! Promise! (I'm a midwife). The infection risk is mainly for vaginal stitches. Whenever people feel ready is okay. X
     
  17. iwantabub

    iwantabub Well-Known Member

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    There's no "rush" but it's just a miss being intimate... And to be totally frank I've been giving blow jobs and doing other things not penetration related for two weeks and I miss being intimate... There's something about being so close with that person u love... And we just made the most beautiful thing in the world so there's lots of emotions and feelings and I love my dh more than ever... Being intimate isn't just about the "sex" it's about loving someone and I miss being like that.
     
  18. iwantabub

    iwantabub Well-Known Member

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    Ms smartie... Thanks so much that's what I thought the bleeding was from ... But then u hear so many different stories and I was too embarased to ask my mw this Morning as she was a bit on the older side and I felt a bit awkward asking if I could get jiggy haha
     
  19. MrsSmartie

    MrsSmartie Mum to 1 and NTNP for #2

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    I understand! I think that's why we dtd so soon. We were just so overwhelmed by this amazing little baby we had made and it has made us love each other even more! You go for it!
     
  20. patch2006uk

    patch2006uk Well-Known Member

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    Pretty much everything I've ever read states that the area the placenta was attached is left as an open wound. There's lining shedding too, but that doesn't mean there aren't open blood vessels where the placenta was attached :shrug:

    Do you have anything I could read that says that the uterus doesn't have a wound immediately PP? I'm interested to know if what I've read is wrong!
     

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