Early 30's TTC #1

[rosababy]

Oh Aisak. I'm sorry. So you know how I feel. Not good. Although I did laugh when you said you sat around and got daytime drunk! That sounds like me. One of my closest friends told me in public, right as we were about to start a week long class...I'm like are you freaking kidding me? You couldn't tell me last night so I could get my embarrassing tears out of the way??? Every time I see my friends or make plans to see friends now, I worry that they're going to announce their pregnancy. To the point where I don't even want to hang out with any of them, regardless of if they're pregnant or not, just in case. Luckily, school starts soon again, so I'll have an excuse not to hang. And I'll be busy and hopefully IVF will work in September for me.

 

[hopefulmama2b]

"The cheese stands alone." Ahaha! Exactly how I feel sometimes!!

Rosa- Yay for AF!

Crumbs- sorry for the BFN, hun. I hope it was just too early.

I'm getting nervous for a BFN and subsequent HSG

 

[MsJMouse]

Just a quick update before I go to work - temp fell today - not below the coverline but it still dropped so I am gutted - i didn't realise how hopeful I was till now. Doesn't help that with DH sick I am so tired - he spent half the night coughing and it got to the point that I told him if he didn't stop coughing could he leave the room so I could get some sleep as I have drive 30 km to work this morning and he can sleep it off today.

So anyway I think I am out - DH keeps saying I am not out to AF arrives and I haven't done a test so i can't be sure but I just feel out now.

Everyone have a great day - will catch up with everyone tomorrow or Friday when I have some time.

 

[Aisak]

MsMouse, i'm so sorry. As much as i like BBT for some things (confirming O), it's so heartbreaking to see that temp drop, especially when you've had such a great chart.

Rosa, what is wrong with people?! i know i've told this story before but... My friend/colleague carpet bombed me with her "news" at our Christmas fun night. Out of nowhere (i was just walking by her - we weren't having a conversation) she says "i'm pregnant, you know." This was the day after i got my period for the last cycle i could try before DH left for 6 months. i had gone to her crying and totally crushed the day before her little announcement. She already had two kids (from 2 different fathers) and had tried for ONE MONTH. She was furious that i wasn't jumping for joy for her. We have not spoken since. She made a big show about being pregnant (i had to work across the hall from her - it was torture)...really milked it. And at every chance she rubbed it in a fellow staff member's face who had been trying for 2 YEARS and was in the process of IUI. She just had her twins in July and is already complaining about the inconvenience they cause. Fertiles really have their heads up their asses sometimes.

 

[rosababy]

I'm getting nervous for a BFN and subsequent HSG

Do you have an hsg scheduled? Just take a double dosage of ibprofen (I took 800 mg) and you'll be fine. It hurts for like 15 seconds, and it's not as bad as I thought it would be. It'll be over before you know it. It's the anticipation and fear that's the worst. I'd do it again...it's not bad.

MsJ, I'm so sorry. I remember feeling that exact feeling when I temped. It's terrible. It doesn't help that you're exhausted either. Can you sleep in the other room or on the couch? Poor dh. I hope he feels better soon. I hope af stays away for you!!

Omg, Aisak, I would have SLAPPED her. Seriously. How rude! And especially after you just told her how upset you were. Wow. People are so awful sometimes. Both of my friends who just told me they are preggo knew how hard it has been for me and were both terrified of telling me. One emailed it, which I really appreciated. The other told me at the beginning of a class which lasted all day, all week. I'm like really? You couldn't have chosen a better time...now everyone in here is watching me cry. Nice.


Btw, started a journal today. Feel free to stalk.

 

[hopefulmama2b]

MsJ- I really hope that's not the case. Your temps are still high and I see an open circle. Maybe it's just because you didn't test at the right time. If you aren't I'm totally losing faith with testing after O if your chart shows obvious signs and it's still not the month. Frustrating!

Rosa- Glad to hear it's not that bad! I'm supposed to call and schedule when AF shows. She should come to town on Friday...the day I'm leaving town for a girls weekend at the lake.

 

[Crumbs]

I was really hoping for some good news from you ladies this morning because my temp dropped too. I should still be in bed but all I thought about was adding my temp in on FF then going on here and expecting to see a from someone because I'm afraid it won't be me this month afterall.

I'm still hoping the stork will come for us and our little momentum of positives doesn't stop now.

 

[mrsmax]

Oh no!! I was logging on hoping for multiple BFPs!!!! I has a sucky day yesterday - found out I didnt get the job I went for, had a horrid client meeting until 9.30pm and the reality of being discharged from NHS hit me and I cried the whole drive home.

I know exactly how you all feel re friends with bumps. 2 more girls annouced at work pregnancies these last 2 weeks and I am trying so hard not to fall apart. I also feel really left out - a bunch of my friends got together for a mini holiday a couple of weeks ago and I wasnt invited - i guess cause i dont have a baby. I wouldnt have wanted to go but I feel so excluded!!

I do have a friend and her 2 kids coming to stay today for a couple of days - I have a feeling I am going to have to tell my TTC story as she is bound to ask. Grrr.

I blocked one of my best friends from FB yesterday who had an "oops" kid 3 months ago. I just cant stand it anymore.

I wish we lived in the same town so we could all hang out together!!

Rosa - I am sooooo excited for you. I might be just a couple of months behind. I dont think there is much of a waiting list if we go private but probably will try IUI first. Just want to get the journey moving...

 

[hopefulmama2b]

Please add me to the dreaded I-had-a-temp-drop-this-morning-list.

Mrsmax- I'm sorry to hear about the job. and the NHS situation- just doesn't sound fair.

I could go for a BnB meet up about now

 

[MrsPTTC]

hopeful, msjmouse & crumbs. The temps are still reasonable though, I still have hopes of 1 BFP out of you! x

 

[MrsPTTC]

mrsmax, they are not friends to treat you like that!! I know it hurts but you're better off without them. Sorry about the job x

 

[clandara]

I am 31 and my DH is 36. We have been TTC #1 for 4 months. I can relate to how Caroline was feeling and i'm sure many others. Each month that goes by it becomes a little bit more difficult for the TWW. This last month I was 5 days late (never late and have an average of a 26 day cycle) and we were both very hopeful, but after two negative tests AF came. Anyways...we are very hopeful and trying to keep our chin's up.

 

[MsJMouse]

So I went to bed last night fully expecting AF to show her ugly face overnight - had definite pre-AF cramping last night. As it is just habit I woke up, took temp, but I didn't look at it and went to the toilet - assuming I would at least see spotting. No spotting, came back from the toilet and checked the temp to see it had gone back up so after my tears yesterday morning (had to go and reapply my makeup before going to work ) it is looking more positive again. Will definitely be testing with FMU tomorrow - even without checking to see if temp had changed.

Now to catch up with everyone else.

 

[MsJMouse]

I had my second FA today and it was terrible. It was 5 minutes long and we got discharged. There is nothing more the NHS can do for us as they dont help people over 35 (I will be 35 in October). If we want treatments or investigations we have to go private and they wont even give me Clomid free. I was expectying it - but at least wanted Clomid, but the rules changed again last month.

We now have to sign up to a private clinic. It could cost £10,000 - £12,000 ftreatment - so I guess we better start saving!! DH is happy for us to book an appointment asap though so that is good.

Not as depressed as thought I would be - had a litte cry driving home, but trying to continue iwth my relaxing month!!!

Miss all you guys - so think I am going to have to come back to BNB soon xxxx

I can't believe that. That sounds like such a stupid rule - I am not sure about in the UK but the average age of first time mums in OZ is pushing just on or over 30 - there is not a lot of room between 30 and 35 to realise that you might need help.

AF came! U/S and bloods on Wednesday morning and hopefully a schedule for injections.

Yay. Hope everything went well yesterday!!!

BTW, I caved. Boo! Two months ago I was curious about my symptoms and was kicking myself for not testing before my temps fell so I pos today. Maybe I'm just fighting off something afterall! If I make it to this weekend without I will test again on Monday. (bolded for myself to remind me to save the tests until then! Hahha)

Sorry about the BFN. Good luck for testing on Monday!!

Afm, another friend just emailed me to tell me she was pregnant. YOU'VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME. They're all coming out and telling me at the same time and I'm going crazy!!! At least this one emailed me, which I appreciate because I don't like to pretend to be happy and congratulate them when I'm crying and feeling like I want to die. She also knew how long we've been trying and that we're having trouble, so she was nervous to tell me.

I feel like I'm really cutting myself out, but I do not want to even see them. I don't want to talk to my pregnant friends, let alone hang out with them. And we all teach the same thing, so I'm going to see them next week and it's going to suck. I'm feeling so so sad right now.

I really hope this cycle works for you. Its times like this I really wish we all lived closer instead of all over the world.

Rosa, i feel your pain. A couple of my group of close friends already had kids when i started trying (and neither of them had to "try" for those babies...they just happened). Since i've been trying 3 more of that group have become pregnant. Two of them were over 35 and only tried for a month or two! Yesterday i had planned to go for lunch with an old friend whom i hadn't seen in a while. Turns out she's 21 weeks pregnant!!! It was an oops and it's not an ideal situation for her (and she at least had the decency to call me beforehand and tell me rather than drop it on me in public) but still! i am the only one left...the cheese stands alone. Needless to say after that phone call we didn't end up going to lunch. i sat around in my pajamas and got daytime drunk. Yay me.

Daytime drunk I can completely understand that. The girl at work who got accidently pregnant and had her baby in June keeps sending baby photos to everyone at work. Then she came in to talk to the boss about when she is going to come back to work and the other staff member in the room just keep asking her about her baby - they all know I had MMC - you think they could give it a rest sometimes huh??

Oh no!! I was logging on hoping for multiple BFPs!!!! I has a sucky day yesterday - found out I didnt get the job I went for, had a horrid client meeting until 9.30pm and the reality of being discharged from NHS hit me and I cried the whole drive home.


I wish we lived in the same town so we could all hang out together!!

Rosa - I am sooooo excited for you. I might be just a couple of months behind. I dont think there is much of a waiting list if we go private but probably will try IUI first. Just want to get the journey moving...

Sorry to hear you had a crappy day and that you didn't get the job.

Hopefully you won't have to wait too long to get things moving.

Hi Clandara - everyone is really great on this thread. Sorry to hear you were late last month with no luck This TTC thing really messes with your head at times (well actually a lot of the time )

Have a good Thursday everyone. I had better get myself moving if I am going to be ready for work in an hour (still in my PJs).

to everyone.

 

[MrsPTTC]

Woo hoo msjmouse! Fingers crossed for you! When is/was AF due? X

Welcome to the thread clandara x

 

[MsJMouse]

So much for going and getting ready for work I haven't made it to the log out button yet

AF was due today so I am definitely testing tomorrow. Feeling heaps better today as I slept in another room so DH didn't wake me all night so maybe as that is what happened the night before, it contributed to the drop in temp???

 

[MrsPTTC]

It sounds like that is what is was. Keep us updated hun, enjoy your Thursday, its still Wednesday here lol x

 

[Soleil Breeze]

Long time, no write. I know. It was an emotional battle after the miscarriage. I kept thinking I had healed and then would break down at the most random times (airplane, restaurant, coming out of the shower, etc., etc.). Well, me and DH skipped a cycle, like the doc. suggested, and last weekend was our time to try again. Of course, I'm obsessing over little twinges, but I know I'm not pregnant. I had AF like cramps at this time in my cycle when I found out I was pregnant in April. I am pretty darn sure that when AF comes this weekend (due Sunday) that I am going to have a bad day.

I JUST WANT TO BE PREGNANT ALREADY!!!

Sigh...

So give me some inspiration. Who got preggers while I was MIA for a coupl'a months?

 

[Crumbs]

MsJMouse, Yay! I'm definitely Fx for you! Although I am out this month, I started spotting before bed. After POS and being pouty all day yesterday and waking up DH to cry today, I think I got most of it out of my system. I especially want at least one of my same chart girls to get a positive! I'm rooting for you and Hopeful!

Soleil, Welcome back!


clandara, Welcome to our little group!

 

[MsJMouse]

Long time, no write. I know. It was an emotional battle after the miscarriage. I kept thinking I had healed and then would break down at the most random times (airplane, restaurant, coming out of the shower, etc., etc.). Well, me and DH skipped a cycle, like the doc. suggested, and last weekend was our time to try again. Of course, I'm obsessing over little twinges, but I know I'm not pregnant. I had AF like cramps at this time in my cycle when I found out I was pregnant in April. I am pretty darn sure that when AF comes this weekend (due Sunday) that I am going to have a bad day.

I JUST WANT TO BE PREGNANT ALREADY!!!

Sigh...

So give me some inspiration. Who got preggers while I was MIA for a coupl'a months?

Hi Soleil - I still have moments like that when I break down but it is getting better. Not looking forward to next weekend as the 3rd Sept was my EDD.
Glad to hear that you are mostly feeling better.