Excuses for time off work

[chocci]

Hi guys

Was just wondering if and when you told work about your fertility treatments. I am only in investigatory phase like follicle tracking and HSG at moment. I feel it is none of works business why i need time off so i just say i have dentist or dos or hospital app. So far luckily noone has asked and to be honest i dont know what i would say if they did. So if you dont tell work what excuses do you all give for having to go to so may appointemtns and have so much time off? What are your opinions about telling work why you need time off?

xxx

 

[miel]

i am my oonw boss so i have no problem taking the time off..

do you feel unconfortable telling them really why you need the day?

 

[vineyard]

I'm going to do in vitro and will have daily appointments so I am going to tell them.

 

[JASMAK]

I work for a large company (the city, actually) and so our time off is very formal. We fill out a form, and on the form it says reason for time off, and I either leave it blank (none of their business) or, if the mood suits me, I will write "medical appointment". If it is medical, I get paid, so, if I want to tell the gossips that, it does benefit me in the end.

 

[FJL]

When I was originally just going for tests and appointments, I didn't tell work. Its easier for me though because I only work 3 days a week so I could just swap a day with someone and tell them that I had an appointment that I made a month or so back, or said that this was the only day I could get in etc.

When we knew we were doing IVF, I had to tell work because of all the random blood tests, scans and then of course being away for a week for egg collection and transfer (our clinic is a 9hr drive away) and apart from those things, I wanted everyone to know as I didn't know how the hormones would affect me. There were many a times that I burst out crying or did stupid little vague things, so if I didn't tell them they would've been like...WTF??? LOL I work at an all female vet clinic so everyone was really understanding.

If I were you, I would keep it on the down low at least until you know whats going on, and once you do know whether or not it will affect work you can decide from there.

Dr's appointments are always a good one because it could be for anything. General check up, mole check, blood tests, x-rays etc If they ask, tell them its for a pap smear, i'm sure that will shut them up!

It might get difficult if they want to see a Dr's certificate, but surely a Dr could give you one...you would be seeing a Dr or getting a test done under them.

 

[chocci]

Hiya All

Thanks for your input, thought it was quite an interesting question. The reason i could do with the day off is that I am going for a HSG. Would rather go back into work since i have had to have an hr here and an hour there for blood tests and scans all through end of nov and dec. I just think my boss will start asking why i need to go to the hospital and dentist so much which are the simple lines i have been giving. They are not a lie and to be honest he has never asked what it is for and just accepted it but if i say i need the whole day off for hospital app i think he may ask. One of my friends just said say its womens problems and that he will just say "oh ok" and run away...problem solved. I may say that but for the HSG think i will have to ring in sick and say i have food posioning or something. I have proper consulation end of jan where all our results and options are discussed until then i dont want bosses or people or even family knowing that we are even having to incvestigate if there is something wrong. I feel part of my problem is feeling pressured to have a baby and hte stress and anxiety may be causing some issues the last thing i need is hte added stress of people knowing that we are even trying!!!

Thnaks for input all
x

 

[Helen]

I had a male boss and so I just to mutter "womens things" at him whenever he tried to find out what was going on. That kept him at bay until one day I had total melt down and ended up telling him about IVF.

By the time it happened, he'd sold the business and the new bosses were based 200 miles away. They didn't even notice I was gone and as as HR Manager I just "forgot" to log a lot of my absences. Ahem

 

[chocci]

Well thats how i see it too. My boss often does not notice wether i am there or not. He knows that i dont take the mickey with time off or not doing work so trusts me to just get on with things. Suppose i am lucky that i have also managed to have appointments when noone has even noticed i have been missing for the morning and simply thought i was in a meeting in another building

 

[Millnsy]

For the first few appointments I didn't say anything but when I started on the CLomid and needed to go for the scans I told them. I've since moved jobs and can fit my scans in at 8am so before work so they don't know. Will have to tell them if we have to go to IUI or IVF which is looking likely.

Good luck

 

[Arcanegirl]

With the laparoscopy i said excatly what i needed the time off for, a lap can be used to investigate lots of things, not just infertility.

 

[chocci]

As i may be able ti use that as an excue it may be useful to know what a lapros...... could be used for other that infertility. Would you please let me know as that may be a bettrer excuse that food poisoining.

 

[Arcanegirl]

Heres a bit of info that might help https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/Laparoscopy/Pages/Introduction.aspx?url=Pages/What-is-it.aspx
I wouldnt worry too much about explaining to your employer in detail about it, all you need to tell them is youre needing to have one for investigations. Its none of their business to ask anymore into it.

 

[chocci]

Thank you for that it was very helpful x
By the way did i read your status right? It has take n you 3 years for pregancy number 1? x

 

[Arcanegirl]

Yep you read that right

 

[chocci]

Wow congratuations Arcanegirl, thats fantastic after waiting so long. Gives hope to us all eh ? xx

 

[rachelle1975]

Hey Chocci

I just told work i had a hospital appt - most people won't ask what for. I'm entitled to 4 hours off work for the hospital anyway (not sure if that is statutory in the UK?).

When it comes to the IVF treatment i will tell my boss purely because i'm entitled to time off for the treatment due to work/life balance and plus they will ease up on my workload to make things easier.

I don't want everyone to know in case it doesn't work and then there is more pressure but on the whole i think it could make my life easier?x