Expecting too much from children

[BlueHadeda]

I hear you all on the homework! I complain about this almost daily! My poor daughter has to go to school for 6 hours, then got home and do 2 hours of homework!!! That's 8 hours of her day - the same duration expected from an adult for a normal office job!!! How can that be??? How can they expect a 6+ year old to be productive 8 hours a day?! Even adults gets tired of this! It's insane!

I also found that they did things too fast too early. For fast learners like my son, it was acceptable. But for slow learners like my daughter, it meant that she was always behind her classmates. Because her brain wasn't ready at age 7 to learn the multiplication tables from heart (as one example). But at age 9, she suddenly "clicked" and within days was able to learn and understand it. So why force children to learn things their brains just can't handle yet? It just wastes hours and hours of the child's time, the mom's time and the teacher's time!

Another gripe I have of our education system, is that the kids have nine subjects!!! At age 9, they write 9 exam papers, 4 terms a year! And the amount of work for each subject is more than the total amount of work we did when I was a child for ALL my subjects! I just can't fathom who came up with this system?! Why kill the children with this amount of work at such a young age? By the time they're 16 they're all burnt out. It takes my poor son 2 weeks of revision to prepare for his exams, and 2 weeks of writing the 9 subjects (studying every spare minute every day to get through the work and writing 1 subject every school day). So for 4 months out of every 12, he studies ALL DAY LONG. How can that be fair on an 11-year old? He still wants to play outside, kick his ball and ride his bike. But when is there time for it?

 

[robinator]

I asked my neighbor how much playtime her first grader gets with her 2 hours of homework. An hour a day, if lucky.

The kid across the street, also in the same class, gets no playtime until the weekend. Not only the homework but all the extracurriculars his parents have him involved in. He's SIX!!!

 

[Natsku]

Thats really sad BlueHadeda. I don't understand why kids are made to work so hard. I can understand it back in the day when their work actually contributed to the household but now all their work does is make them more stressed.

 

[MrsKyliePaton]

Kids just don't have a life anymore, to much is expected of them at such a young age, they can't go out to play without an adult present either 'just incase' which means they are getting out to play less, I know in my situation I have that much to do during the day and night and having the lo that miah is lucky to get to the park at the weekend (we live in Scotland also so never the weather lol) but I do feel sorry for the next generation as they are going to grow up resenting everything, as they didn't have the freedom that we did, and spent it doing homework!!

 

[robinator]

Don't even get me going on kids not being able to play unsupervised. A friend won't let her boys play in their front yard, period, because a child molester might drive by and see them. They are not allowed unsupervised in their backyard because a predator might climb over the back fence and kidnap one of them. They are not allowed to play outside at church, no matter what, as (according to her) churches are prime child molester territory. The fear she must be instilling in those poor kids

 

[Dragonfly]

And the schools are suppose to get tougher and longer hours they always like to discuss. I cant remember where I seen it but they wanted schools to finish at 5 and parents thought this was great. Tougher exams to, To much pressure on children. They dont have time to be children. What happened to learning through play? even in the pre school William was in it wasnt fun they where regimented and walked around in lines. My impression on open day was that they went and played with toys, whatever they wanted, how wrong was I.

 

[fantastica]

I don't want Alex to have an ipad or a cell phone before 16, unless it has to do with school (like textbooks on an ipad, which actually isn't a bad idea and it will save kids' backs in high school).

Sorry this is jumping back a little, but do you think it's really realistic to avoid having a cell phone until 16? What if he wants to go out and about with his friends..would it not be safer to be able to ring you if needed?

Not a criticism or anything, just wondered if, with the way the world is now, is it really possible? (ipad etc. isn't quite the same though, can see where you're coming from with that!)

 

[BlueHadeda]

I don't want Alex to have an ipad or a cell phone before 16, unless it has to do with school (like textbooks on an ipad, which actually isn't a bad idea and it will save kids' backs in high school).

Sorry this is jumping back a little, but do you think it's really realistic to avoid having a cell phone until 16? What if he wants to go out and about with his friends..would it not be safer to be able to ring you if needed?

Not a criticism or anything, just wondered if, with the way the world is now, is it really possible? (ipad etc. isn't quite the same though, can see where you're coming from with that!)

With most things, I agree, children shouldn't get too many technology too soon. But on cellphones, I have realised we need to give in. My son is turning 12 soon and we said he'll get his first cell then. Because in the past year it has happened many, many times that either the afterschool activity was cancelled on short notice (and NO call or sms from the school or teacher to let me know!), or they came out 20 or 30 mintues earlier from the activity. Then my son has to wait at the school, sometimes quite alone, which I find unacceptable. So we decided it's time for a cellphone, so that he can call me when he needs me to come and pick him up sooner. We will have strict rules in place with it. No internet or social media access or such things. We'll put a few games on for him to entertain himself while he waits, and limited funds, just enough to make a few calls to me.

In the beginning of this year (when he was still 10), about a third in his class of 30 kids had cellphones. Around mid-year, half of the kids had. End of the year, my son was one of 3 children who didn't have a cellphone (kids all 11 years old).

 

[BrokenfoREVer]

I'll deffo be saying Josh can't have one til he's 11. It was a right of passage for me (I think I was 13 when I got my first phone) & a show of faith about being adult in my eyes.

I don't care if every kid in his class has 1 as 8 or 9, there is no need at that age!

 

[Dragonfly]

I would give my child a mobile if he was old enough to go places without me. It could save their lives. I had a phone card as a kid, worked in any phone box and was billed to my parents so if I needed to call I could.

 

[Natsku]

Maria will get a mobile once she starts going places without me, whatever age that is, but it'll just be a simple one that makes calls and sends texts, no iPhone or anything like that

 

[tasha41]

^ if simple ones even exist by then! When she's 13 for example our iphones today will be like those hulking clunky Nokia phones with the pull out antennas!

 

[Natsku]

Good point. Damn technology! But I'm sure they will still have those simple phones they have for old people - she can have one of those

 

[MrsKyliePaton]

I'll be giving my lo a mobile phone around the age of 12, I got my first one at 13 as I was allowed to go into town on the bus on my own with friends. I let my lo out in the garden and around the front of the house, she can also go out on her scooter in the street as its a quiet cul-de-sac but I can see her from the window