F.A.I.T.H. (Forsaking all, I trust Him)

[Aaisrie]

Someday you shoulda marked the time difference on the chart because it's still showing as a dot. Also (not to put on your chart) did you put it in the adjuster just to SEE what it would have been?

 

[mrskcbrown]

Hi all. @someday: I got tired of seeing how many days I was late and no BFP although I havent tested since last saturday. I promise, promise to test tomorrow morning, LOL. I know day after day I say that I am going to test but I do not. Im scared too. Someone in my other group just got a BFP after being 6-7 days late, so now that has given me some hope. Im 8-9 days late. My cervix seems to be still high, soft, closed. I can barely reach it!

@everyone: Keep hope alive. We all need it!

 

[Aaisrie]

Mrskcbrown How do you know it's closed?? I have been trying to work it out whether mine is open or closed, the last couple of days it's felt different, it's been more puckered and less of a dent in it??

 

[Guppy051708]

Mrskcbrown, can't wait for your
All bets on you getting it VERY soon!

 

[mrskcbrown]

Mrskcbrown How do you know it's closed?? I have been trying to work it out whether mine is open or closed, the last couple of days it's felt different, it's been more puckered and less of a dent in it??

It just like flat to me and I dont feel an opening. Im clearly no expert in this area, I dont chart or anything. I get my general ideas from the pictures that I see in my book, Taking charge of your fertility. So please dont use me as a reference point.

Thanks Guppy! I feel like I am going to finally get it!

 

[Guppy051708]

I feel like you are too, and you deserve it!

 

[Aaisrie]

Mrskcbrown I need some reference point!! Normally it feels like an O but the last couple of days it's felt more..... like a cats bum or something LOL sorry for the crude description but like puckered and more flat, less dented than usual?

 

[willbamom1day]

Hi everyone! Dahlia invited me to your group and I am sooo glad. Thank you Dahlia

I pray for all those at BnB when I have my bible prayer time - even though I don't know everone and the names I know God knows each and everyone here and the needs/desires they have.

I look forward to getting to know you all.

Many blessings!!!

 

[mrskcbrown]

@aaisirie:hmm, when I check later, I will let you know. I'm not too sure.

Ok so I tested because I felt hopeful and guess what another BFN. I tested because I said surely if I am 8/9 days late it would show up now! With me being this late I don't think testing in morning or afternoon really makes a difference?? I think I'm so over getting a BFP at that point and I just want my cycle to come. I go to dr next Thursday and after I get that negative test I hope they put me on provera to start my cycle.

 

[im_mi]

Im sorry mrskc *hugs*

 

[Guppy051708]

mrskcbrown, are you sure of your Ov. day? Because that could def. change things (as far as when you're able to get a BFP). Do you temp or anything like that to know without a doubt about your ovulation date? Just something to confirm when you think you're Ov.? Because that could make a whole world of a difference as far as testing goes.

 

[mrskcbrown]

mrskcbrown, are you sure of your Ov. day? Because that could def. change things (as far as when you're able to get a BFP). Do you temp or anything like that to know without a doubt about your ovulation date? Just something to confirm when you think you're Ov.? Because that could make a whole world of a difference as far as testing goes.

Well I was OPKing every month and I would get my positive test around the same dates every month. So I just took it that I would get my O around the same time give or take a day. I also have ovulation symptoms monthly, like pain in my ovaries and cramping, so I know I usually O a day or two later. So after noticing that month after month and then 2 weeks later getting my period, I kinda know whats going on. After I see the DR I will probably OPK again or something but I didnt do well at temping and not sure if I want to do that again. I usually never test but this month with missing my cycle I just so felt this was it, but once again it isnt.

Its ok guys. Thanks for all of your positive feeback. Ive come to terms with this just isnt my time. I dont know when it will ever be but I just dont want to stress over it anymore. Sure the DR will probably give me another urine and the RE possibly a blood test but Im not holding my breath about either of them. Again it just is what it is.

I was asking God while I was driving, "why me", not that I would want to wish this on anyone, but "why"? Im 35 and Ive always wanted 4 kids but now im not so sure. Its so depressing.

 

[Guppy051708]

you will get your babies. Its not over until AF.
Just remember that God gave Sarah a baby.
He will bless you with one too

 

[mrskcbrown]

Thanks, Im literally sitting here crying so much I cant see.

I just dont know anymore.

 

[Dahlia]

Hi Willba - can I call you that? Welcome - so glad you came over! Wonderful group of sisters here to pray with and for during this sometimes tough ttc time.

Speaking of, Mrskc - I'm sorry honey.

Lord, we cry out to you. Please bless our wombs with the little ones we soooooooo desire. And in this frustrating time of wait and trial please comfort Mrskc. Help us all find the joy in this wait and to trust in your perfect timing. I ask 'why why why not yet God?' but help me to thank u for your understanding and plans.

 

[groovygrl]

Dahlia, thank you for praying openly with us like that! Amen

Oh mrskc I'm so sorry you're crying. It's really heartbreaking sometimes, I know. I wish there was something I could do above and beyond my prayers. I hope the angels dry your tears and rock your spirit as you dream tonight. It's okay to cry out, let your emotions put on a grand show!

I hope you get some answers soon! It's a privilege to be on this journey with you! The reality is...we'll set ourselves up for this emotional slam dunk again and again. We will do it until we get our BFP's. I know it feels like you just don't have it in you anymore but...you do. so...come along, let's do it again

 

[Deb111]

Thanks, Im literally sitting here crying so much I cant see.

I just dont know anymore.

MrsKC, I'm sorry you're having such a hard time at the moment - it's so awful when our bodies play tricks on us. I was 4 days late last cycle

I'm 36 now and have been TTC for 19 cycles (although for a part of that my hubby had undiagnosed underactive thyroid - which can have an affect on fertility and also his libido, so it was a pretty tough time). I often feel like it will never happen. I've never seen that elusive
But I HAVE to believe it will happen because believing anything else is just ... too unbearable

Sending you and praying for you xx

 

[beanni #1]

Welcome Willba, and AMEN to all the prayers.

Thinking of you during this time MrsKC. Do not loose hope. I read a devotional the other day about why sometimes certain doors are closed to us. Have faith that GOD is not a GOD to punish or toy with our hearts and emotions he has a far greater and glorious plan and WHEN you do push out baby number 4 you can look back at this and testify just how wonderful the LORD is

 

[willbamom1day]

Thank you all for the warm welcome! I can feel the love of God between you all just by reading your words of care and concern for each other - what a blessing.

Mrskcbrown I am sorry to read of your situation God has you at this point in time for a reason and rememebr He works all things to His glory - in other words God likes to show up and show out if you know what I mean. Your time will come, He knows the desires of your heart as He gave them to you. One thing I like to refer to is one of the most repeated things in the bible "and it came to pass" and you have to know that those bfn's did not come to stay and neither did you not getting your bfp yet. God is always right on time. My prayers are with you

As for me no show of af today either and a slight drop in temp again this morning. No sign of her just slight pressure low down and extreme hot flashes. Hubby and I have decided to test in the morning before church if I she is still a no show and I have a temp rise.

Seek the Lord and his strength Psalms 105:4

 

[Aaisrie]

pray for me please.