February 2013 Love Bugs

[gflady]

Haha, pesto pasta sounds awesome. Although right now I'm having massive cake cravings!

 

[embo216]

mmm pesto with pine nuts!

 

[Rota]

• 
  Here goes;This is gonna be long( bits in blue are the key points, rest is back ground)
• His family live in nottingham, we dont drive and lived on a tiny amount of money before i got my nurse job so we couldnt afford to travel to nottingham that often. His family messed us about the few times that we did scrap the money together (cancelled meetings when we were already in nottingham/didnt turn up), gossiped and bitched about me. he got into an arguement with his brother+SIL we didnt speak to the brother+SIL and his mother and sisters sided with the brother so we didnt speak to any of them. None of them rang DD on her birthday/xmas/easter and we rang them and left messages but they rarely rung back. This has been going on for almost 3 years now. We only have contact with FIL+step MIL, step BIL and step SIL (they ring DD and send cards and make an effort to visit/keep in touch). FIL+stepMIL took DD to stay at their house over the summer holidays, they told me that they wanted to take DD to meet her great aunt D and M which i thought was nice. Anyways fast forward to last week when i took DD out with a friend of mine and DD mentioned her cousins and then immediately said 'oh daddy said i shouldnt tell you' When i got home i spoke to OH and he said that basically stepMIL had taken DD to nottingham to meet the family who we have nothing to do with (SIL,BIL,ETC) and they had lied to my face and OH had told DD to lie to me,i mean asking an 8 year old to lie to her mother!! and for weeks on end as this happened back in august
  
• A few months ago whilst at work i got a phone call from OH saying that there were baliffs on the doorstep.After speaking to the baliff it turns out that OH had been hiding demands/final demands/court orders and then calling notices.so rather than me being able to do a minimal payment order of ££ a month because he had hidden it from me and time had ticked on the baliff/court wanted £££ a month instead. My post isnt always regular and it seems to be even more patchy than normal so im wondering if he is upto his old tricks again and im petrified that yet another baliff is waiting in the wings.
  
• Just got off the phone with housing association, i thought he had been paying the rent+extra towards the arrears but it turns out he has just been making the minimum rent payments. Housing association want more per month now.
  
• My depression is showing signs of coming back. My meds have been doubled but they arent helping me through the day. they dont want to increase them anymore as they could affect Bump, but lets just say im on thin ice mentally at the moment
  
• He is looking at other women (which isnt a problem) but its the comments that he is making about them that are getting to me. Im a big girl normally and despite me losing almost 2 stone now i feel like a whale due to the massive bump (must get photo of it). He doesnt have anything to say to me anymore,before he used to compliment me ie 'love you in those jeans/top' now nothing and he has offered to pay for me to have my hair cut and coloured as he is tired of me tie-ing it up all the time.
  
• He wont touch me or even come near me. Cant remember the last time he actually kissed me. When i try to initiate anything he is too tired or not in the mood. When i was pregnant with DD he was actually really randy and affectionate.
  
• I have to nag him to do anything,for instance a few weeks ago it took me over a week to get him to go in the loft for the suitcase so that i could try to tidy up by putting all the baby/hospital bits in one place (our ladder only takes 19 stone in weight so i really do not want to use it as im just over the limit). He still hasnt decorated the kids room, or finished the stairs (been 3 months now)
  
• It could be the fact that im depressed again but i really dont know if i can have this baby. I havent felt movements, i cant afford the baby, im scared that im gonna end up with another c-section or worse end up with PND again. It isnt helping that it feels like OH has no feelings towards the Bump, no excitement, hasnt looked at outfits, gets snappy with me when i say anything baby related.
  
• Work are being difficult with me having time off for the extra scans and consultant appointments Ive not been able to get an appointment with my midwife as im always at work or there are no appointments so i havent seen my midwife since i was 8 weeks.
  
  

 

[WhisperOfHope]

• 
  Here goes;This is gonna be long( bits in blue are the key points, rest is back ground)
• His family live in nottingham, we dont drive and lived on a tiny amount of money before i got my nurse job so we couldnt afford to travel to nottingham that often. His family messed us about the few times that we did scrap the money together (cancelled meetings when we were already in nottingham/didnt turn up), gossiped and bitched about me. he got into an arguement with his brother+SIL we didnt speak to the brother+SIL and his mother and sisters sided with the brother so we didnt speak to any of them. None of them rang DD on her birthday/xmas/easter and we rang them and left messages but they rarely rung back. This has been going on for almost 3 years now. We only have contact with FIL+step MIL, step BIL and step SIL (they ring DD and send cards and make an effort to visit/keep in touch). FIL+stepMIL took DD to stay at their house over the summer holidays, they told me that they wanted to take DD to meet her great aunt D and M which i thought was nice. Anyways fast forward to last week when i took DD out with a friend of mine and DD mentioned her cousins and then immediately said 'oh daddy said i shouldnt tell you' When i got home i spoke to OH and he said that basically stepMIL had taken DD to nottingham to meet the family who we have nothing to do with (SIL,BIL,ETC) and they had lied to my face and OH had told DD to lie to me,i mean asking an 8 year old to lie to her mother!! and for weeks on end as this happened back in august
  
• A few months ago whilst at work i got a phone call from OH saying that there were baliffs on the doorstep.After speaking to the baliff it turns out that OH had been hiding demands/final demands/court orders and then calling notices.so rather than me being able to do a minimal payment order of ££ a month because he had hidden it from me and time had ticked on the baliff/court wanted £££ a month instead. My post isnt always regular and it seems to be even more patchy than normal so im wondering if he is upto his old tricks again and im petrified that yet another baliff is waiting in the wings.
  
• Just got off the phone with housing association, i thought he had been paying the rent+extra towards the arrears but it turns out he has just been making the minimum rent payments. Housing association want more per month now.
  
• My depression is showing signs of coming back. My meds have been doubled but they arent helping me through the day. they dont want to increase them anymore as they could affect Bump, but lets just say im on thin ice mentally at the moment
  
• He is looking at other women (which isnt a problem) but its the comments that he is making about them that are getting to me. Im a big girl normally and despite me losing almost 2 stone now i feel like a whale due to the massive bump (must get photo of it). He doesnt have anything to say to me anymore,before he used to compliment me ie 'love you in those jeans/top' now nothing and he has offered to pay for me to have my hair cut and coloured as he is tired of me tie-ing it up all the time.
  
• He wont touch me or even come near me. Cant remember the last time he actually kissed me. When i try to initiate anything he is too tired or not in the mood. When i was pregnant with DD he was actually really randy and affectionate.
  
• I have to nag him to do anything,for instance a few weeks ago it took me over a week to get him to go in the loft for the suitcase so that i could try to tidy up by putting all the baby/hospital bits in one place (our ladder only takes 19 stone in weight so i really do not want to use it as im just over the limit). He still hasnt decorated the kids room, or finished the stairs (been 3 months now)
  
• It could be the fact that im depressed again but i really dont know if i can have this baby. I havent felt movements, i cant afford the baby, im scared that im gonna end up with another c-section or worse end up with PND again. It isnt helping that it feels like OH has no feelings towards the Bump, no excitement, hasnt looked at outfits, gets snappy with me when i say anything baby related.
  
• Work are being difficult with me having time off for the extra scans and consultant appointments Ive not been able to get an appointment with my midwife as im always at work or there are no appointments so i havent seen my midwife since i was 8 weeks.
  
  

 

[embo216]

• 
  Here goes;This is gonna be long( bits in blue are the key points, rest is back ground)
• His family live in nottingham, we dont drive and lived on a tiny amount of money before i got my nurse job so we couldnt afford to travel to nottingham that often. His family messed us about the few times that we did scrap the money together (cancelled meetings when we were already in nottingham/didnt turn up), gossiped and bitched about me. he got into an arguement with his brother+SIL we didnt speak to the brother+SIL and his mother and sisters sided with the brother so we didnt speak to any of them. None of them rang DD on her birthday/xmas/easter and we rang them and left messages but they rarely rung back. This has been going on for almost 3 years now. We only have contact with FIL+step MIL, step BIL and step SIL (they ring DD and send cards and make an effort to visit/keep in touch). FIL+stepMIL took DD to stay at their house over the summer holidays, they told me that they wanted to take DD to meet her great aunt D and M which i thought was nice. Anyways fast forward to last week when i took DD out with a friend of mine and DD mentioned her cousins and then immediately said 'oh daddy said i shouldnt tell you' When i got home i spoke to OH and he said that basically stepMIL had taken DD to nottingham to meet the family who we have nothing to do with (SIL,BIL,ETC) and they had lied to my face and OH had told DD to lie to me,i mean asking an 8 year old to lie to her mother!! and for weeks on end as this happened back in august
  
• A few months ago whilst at work i got a phone call from OH saying that there were baliffs on the doorstep.After speaking to the baliff it turns out that OH had been hiding demands/final demands/court orders and then calling notices.so rather than me being able to do a minimal payment order of ££ a month because he had hidden it from me and time had ticked on the baliff/court wanted £££ a month instead. My post isnt always regular and it seems to be even more patchy than normal so im wondering if he is upto his old tricks again and im petrified that yet another baliff is waiting in the wings.
  
• Just got off the phone with housing association, i thought he had been paying the rent+extra towards the arrears but it turns out he has just been making the minimum rent payments. Housing association want more per month now.
  
• My depression is showing signs of coming back. My meds have been doubled but they arent helping me through the day. they dont want to increase them anymore as they could affect Bump, but lets just say im on thin ice mentally at the moment
  
• He is looking at other women (which isnt a problem) but its the comments that he is making about them that are getting to me. Im a big girl normally and despite me losing almost 2 stone now i feel like a whale due to the massive bump (must get photo of it). He doesnt have anything to say to me anymore,before he used to compliment me ie 'love you in those jeans/top' now nothing and he has offered to pay for me to have my hair cut and coloured as he is tired of me tie-ing it up all the time.
  
• He wont touch me or even come near me. Cant remember the last time he actually kissed me. When i try to initiate anything he is too tired or not in the mood. When i was pregnant with DD he was actually really randy and affectionate.
  
• I have to nag him to do anything,for instance a few weeks ago it took me over a week to get him to go in the loft for the suitcase so that i could try to tidy up by putting all the baby/hospital bits in one place (our ladder only takes 19 stone in weight so i really do not want to use it as im just over the limit). He still hasnt decorated the kids room, or finished the stairs (been 3 months now)
  
• It could be the fact that im depressed again but i really dont know if i can have this baby. I havent felt movements, i cant afford the baby, im scared that im gonna end up with another c-section or worse end up with PND again. It isnt helping that it feels like OH has no feelings towards the Bump, no excitement, hasnt looked at outfits, gets snappy with me when i say anything baby related.
  
• Work are being difficult with me having time off for the extra scans and consultant appointments Ive not been able to get an appointment with my midwife as im always at work or there are no appointments so i havent seen my midwife since i was 8 weeks.
  
  

You have so much going on at the moment

 

[future hopes]

Had a lovely day round my friends today but just got back from school run and my back and pelvis feel like there gonna snap really painfull outchy outch.

Ladies so dont know how im gonna sleep tonight so nervous about my scan tomnorow

Had MS nearly all day today but was only sick this morning. Euwwww

 

[tntrying22]

Rota are you happy with your OH and this is a rough patch or have you considered separating, or possibly counseling? I am concerned mainly about you (the other items suck, don't get me wrong) and your mental health - it may help you to speak with someone who can help you manage all these emotions and issues...Your OH has some serious explaining to do that's for sure...I would be livid if he was asking DD to lie, hiding court documents, and pocketing rent money, much less the terrible time he's been showing your relationship...Maybe it's time for a frank discussion about the state of your relationship?

And wow, can you find a new job? I know it's not the ideal time to change but I mean these must be nasty people to not let you leave for a little while to get a health check up - can you make up the time if that's the issue? I can't imagine they would hold your and little one's health in such low regard...

hugs!!

 

[future hopes]

• 
  Here goes;This is gonna be long( bits in blue are the key points, rest is back ground)
• His family live in nottingham, we dont drive and lived on a tiny amount of money before i got my nurse job so we couldnt afford to travel to nottingham that often. His family messed us about the few times that we did scrap the money together (cancelled meetings when we were already in nottingham/didnt turn up), gossiped and bitched about me. he got into an arguement with his brother+SIL we didnt speak to the brother+SIL and his mother and sisters sided with the brother so we didnt speak to any of them. None of them rang DD on her birthday/xmas/easter and we rang them and left messages but they rarely rung back. This has been going on for almost 3 years now. We only have contact with FIL+step MIL, step BIL and step SIL (they ring DD and send cards and make an effort to visit/keep in touch). FIL+stepMIL took DD to stay at their house over the summer holidays, they told me that they wanted to take DD to meet her great aunt D and M which i thought was nice. Anyways fast forward to last week when i took DD out with a friend of mine and DD mentioned her cousins and then immediately said 'oh daddy said i shouldnt tell you' When i got home i spoke to OH and he said that basically stepMIL had taken DD to nottingham to meet the family who we have nothing to do with (SIL,BIL,ETC) and they had lied to my face and OH had told DD to lie to me,i mean asking an 8 year old to lie to her mother!! and for weeks on end as this happened back in august
  
• A few months ago whilst at work i got a phone call from OH saying that there were baliffs on the doorstep.After speaking to the baliff it turns out that OH had been hiding demands/final demands/court orders and then calling notices.so rather than me being able to do a minimal payment order of ££ a month because he had hidden it from me and time had ticked on the baliff/court wanted £££ a month instead. My post isnt always regular and it seems to be even more patchy than normal so im wondering if he is upto his old tricks again and im petrified that yet another baliff is waiting in the wings.
  
• Just got off the phone with housing association, i thought he had been paying the rent+extra towards the arrears but it turns out he has just been making the minimum rent payments. Housing association want more per month now.
  
• My depression is showing signs of coming back. My meds have been doubled but they arent helping me through the day. they dont want to increase them anymore as they could affect Bump, but lets just say im on thin ice mentally at the moment
  
• He is looking at other women (which isnt a problem) but its the comments that he is making about them that are getting to me. Im a big girl normally and despite me losing almost 2 stone now i feel like a whale due to the massive bump (must get photo of it). He doesnt have anything to say to me anymore,before he used to compliment me ie 'love you in those jeans/top' now nothing and he has offered to pay for me to have my hair cut and coloured as he is tired of me tie-ing it up all the time.
  
• He wont touch me or even come near me. Cant remember the last time he actually kissed me. When i try to initiate anything he is too tired or not in the mood. When i was pregnant with DD he was actually really randy and affectionate.
  
• I have to nag him to do anything,for instance a few weeks ago it took me over a week to get him to go in the loft for the suitcase so that i could try to tidy up by putting all the baby/hospital bits in one place (our ladder only takes 19 stone in weight so i really do not want to use it as im just over the limit). He still hasnt decorated the kids room, or finished the stairs (been 3 months now)
  
• It could be the fact that im depressed again but i really dont know if i can have this baby. I havent felt movements, i cant afford the baby, im scared that im gonna end up with another c-section or worse end up with PND again. It isnt helping that it feels like OH has no feelings towards the Bump, no excitement, hasnt looked at outfits, gets snappy with me when i say anything baby related.
  
• Work are being difficult with me having time off for the extra scans and consultant appointments Ive not been able to get an appointment with my midwife as im always at work or there are no appointments so i havent seen my midwife since i was 8 weeks.
  
  

You have so much going on at the moment

Awwww hunny im so very sorry all this is happening how awfull. Sending u many hugs

 

[Rota]

Your OH has some serious explaining to do that's for sure...I would be livid if he was asking DD to lie, hiding court documents, and pocketing rent money, much less the terrible time he's been showing your relationship...Maybe it's time for a frank discussion about the state of your relationship?

And wow, can you find a new job? I know it's not the ideal time to change but I mean these must be nasty people to not let you leave for a little while to get a health check up - can you make up the time if that's the issue? I can't imagine they would hold your and little one's health in such low regard...

hugs!!

I honestly thought we were happy,i had my coil removed as we were thinking about trying for another child as we were both working so finances seemed to be ok, the house was coming along and it seemed right. Its the last two,maybe three months that something hasnt been right between us. I sat him down on sunday evening to discuss the issues and it ended up in a 6 hour shouting match and nothing was achieved or solved. I slept on the sofa last night as i cant be near him at the moment.

I asked him for MIL phone number as i wanted to talk to her about the visit to nottingham and he has now convieniently lost his mobile phone with her numbers in.

My work dont care about the workers, all they care about is a,b and c being completed. This is the same place that had me pushing beds at 12 weeks. Ive offered to work later (i do anyways, thats another issue at the moment between me and OH as im working at least 45-60 minutes late each shift,unpaid,to ensure i give my patients the best care i can)

 

[smileyfaces]

Found out today Im having a BOY! Totally shocked! Was convinced it was a little lady! Xxx

 

[ayclobes]

my placenta for lil man is anterior also, i dont feel him kick as much, but i know he's kicking alot in there because i use my doppler 1-2x a day and he's always kicking/punching/moving around..i should be feeling him more regularly within the next couple of weeks..or so i hope!

 

[fides]

I am the same way, Farida - I only feel kicks way down low, and I had an anterior placenta last time around too and it was the same until baby got bigger. Anyway, sorry your DH won't be with you when you move - i can't imagine.

Hi I think I have anterior placenta too, what did the dr tell u? is it going to move? mine is on my left and very low.

it moved on its own a little to the side last time, so it was still sort of in the front, but as your uterus grows it gets bigger than the placenta making more room for kicks to be felt - by months 8-9, i could certainly feel all the kicks to the ribs. sometimes they move; sometimes not.

Hi ladies
how is everyone today ?
i bought baby first outfit yesterday

how exciting!

My life seems to be falling apart around my ears at the moment,relationship issues with OH,family issues,money issues, house issues,baby issues and to top it off work issues again. I will post more later when im not so angry/upset.

Found out today Im having a BOY! Totally shocked! Was convinced it was a little lady! Xxx

congrats!

 

[Seity]

one side of it anyway lol good thing about ikea is you can save up and get for the other side too tryna make everything nice and homeley we are currently living off sanwiches and microwave food atm as we have no kitchen so no oven or anything

Oh no yea course! I remember when I was without my oven for weeks- nightmare

Ugh, My oven broke a few years back and because it was a built in I couldn't afford to replace it for a year. It was such a pain not having one. We finally got a good deal online and we installed it ourselves. I was 5 months pregnant at the time, so I had to have my husband help me lift it into place after I wired it up.

Congrats on your boy smileyfaces! I thought I had a girl too. Guess we were both wrong.

 

[tntrying22]

Your OH has some serious explaining to do that's for sure...I would be livid if he was asking DD to lie, hiding court documents, and pocketing rent money, much less the terrible time he's been showing your relationship...Maybe it's time for a frank discussion about the state of your relationship?

And wow, can you find a new job? I know it's not the ideal time to change but I mean these must be nasty people to not let you leave for a little while to get a health check up - can you make up the time if that's the issue? I can't imagine they would hold your and little one's health in such low regard...

hugs!!

I honestly thought we were happy,i had my coil removed as we were thinking about trying for another child as we were both working so finances seemed to be ok, the house was coming along and it seemed right. Its the last two,maybe three months that something hasnt been right between us. I sat him down on sunday evening to discuss the issues and it ended up in a 6 hour shouting match and nothing was achieved or solved. I slept on the sofa last night as i cant be near him at the moment.

I asked him for MIL phone number as i wanted to talk to her about the visit to nottingham and he has now convieniently lost his mobile phone with her numbers in.

My work dont care about the workers, all they care about is a,b and c being completed. This is the same place that had me pushing beds at 12 weeks. Ive offered to work later (i do anyways, thats another issue at the moment between me and OH as im working at least 45-60 minutes late each shift,unpaid,to ensure i give my patients the best care i can)

Are these reoccurring issues for you regarding family and money? If so you might find it helpful to see a counselor together - my hubs and I couldn't get past some reoccurring issues and we went to see someone a few times and sometimes it helps to have a mediator type person to talk through with. It might take you a few times to find someone you both like but it is a good option if you are willing.

The MIL issue is tricky - does he feel caught in the middle of that? Are you more upset that she saw them or that he asked her to lie about it?

Work issue - I would start looking for something else IMO just in case you can find a better work environment. They should be supportive of your health

If you want to pm me you can

 

[embo216]

Congratulations Smiley! I'm so excited to have brothers, kind of nervous about the play fighting though

 

[Rota]

<is munching away on broccoli,cauliflower,sweetcorn, brussel sprouts and chicken




ps, OH has had to work late, was supposed to finish at 5, but the stupid bint who was working the late shift didnt turn up and has turned her phone off so he has now had to work til 9.

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

congrats on team blue

Rota- big hugs.

Em- thinking of you tomorrow x

 

[Fruitymeli]

congrats on team blue

 

[sara3337]

Hi Ladies thanks for your comments. I am still waiting for hospital to ring me with an ultrasound appointment. I spoke to a Dr too and he said I shouldnt worry even if its Placenta Previa at the time of birth i just have c section and shouldnt worry now.

Thanks for ur support, just love to feel my baby kick )))

 

[sara3337]

According to skull theory, what do u guys think I am having?