Fed up of comments ...

[ChristiansMum]

Especially from my mum and dad. We told them quite early on as we live so close ect. Well now they keep coming out with comments like "well you won't be able to do that with 3 kids" and after I told my dad what an awful Christmas Day we had and I had told him next year we are doing it at home next year just us and he just said "well with 3 kids you won't have much choice" and I have already had the "2 kids in nappies that will be fun you best start saving". It just makes me feel rubbish to be honest. I know this baby was a suprise but surely they should be supporting me instead of making me feel like this?

Also they have decided to tell all my aunts,uncles,grandparents and basically everyone in our family and I'm so annoyed. And now everyone keeps ringing me up and asking "have you got something to tell me? Well your mum/dad has already told me" and my nan every turned round and said "wow 3 what you going to do now? You have got yourself in a real problem" I didn't want to tell anyone a part from parents before my 12 week scan and defiantly not on my daughters 1st Christmas/birthday.

Has anyone already got 3 kids and feel like there life had to stop? It's really making me feel down to the point I just want to sit and cry and not see anyone incase they have a new comment xx

 

[Luvspnk31]

NO!!! In fact I'm pg with #5. While things can get a bit chaotic at first with 3, and you may not be able to do everything you want, it's not even close to as dire as they make it sound, sheesh! I find that some people are so driven ink their thinking by money, and what "they" won't be able to so anymore, that they don't see what a joy children are. Yes, money gets tight, and some days I feel like I'm going crazy, but my kids are awesome!!! Wouldn't change it !!

 

[daddiesgift]

So sorry love Don't let people scare you or get you down. Your life is not over because you are having a third child! I've had two in diapers, wasn't bad at all because I was already use to changing ones diapers two was easy! I'm sure having three will be a challenge but nothing we can't handle. Be happy for you and your family even if no one else is

 

[Paperhearts]

That's ridiculous! Anything you can do with 2 children, you can do with 3. Just ignore it and show them all just how well you can do with your three. Sorry they're acting so silly about it.

 

[2have4kids]

Omg those ppl are so square, my gf is exactly the same and it's SO irritating. My favourite comeback is 'I'm going to pretend I didn't just hear that'. It tells them you don't think it's appropriate and you're not going to put up with negativity without really being nasty or defensive. It's a nice way to set boundaries.

My gf just had her second and has whined her way through her first. I want 4 kids, I want to go camping and have adventures with my family. This girl is so anal she could barely get it together to go camping with no kids. The next time she nay says my ideas I'll just remind her what a challenge life seemed for her without kids never mind with kids and that I'm sure I'll be just fine but thanks for the concern. Bah!! They're just jealous, smile sweety, you're going to have a BEAUTIFUL family!!! I'm excited for you, you're 1 short of my dream family lol

 

[ChristiansMum]

Thankyou for all your kind comments

My family is very 2 kids max. My mum even said to my husband "you should if had the snip after Isabel (my youngest)" but he just laughed it off with "don't talk about my man hood"

My husbands family are fine with it but he is from a very large family. He is the eldest of 9. He has 7 cousins off 1 uncle and his poor nan only had 2 children!!

I'm at the point were I feel ashamed of my self for being pregnant again when my youngest is only 11 months. Sorry for the rant x

 

[minties]

Oh gosh this makes me angry! Never be ashamed, it's amazing and wonderful to bring children into the world. Be proud. Your family are pessimistic and unsupportive.

Just think, 3 special little people to cuddle and love. How wonderful! Lucky you. Congratulations.

 

[shirlls]

Sorry to hear your family are being unsupportive and negative about your pregnancy. It is your life and your decision how many children you have, not theirs. It is very sad when parents can't support their children and enforce their own beliefs on them, I have a similar problem with my parents, not in the same way as you but in other areas, if they don't agree, I get no support only their own opinion forced down my throat. It makes me feel like sh*t because your parents should be the people who you turn to and who should be your main support network. When they aren't it can be very upsetting.

With all due respect, I think your parents are out of order to be so negative with you. Every child is a gift whether you have 2 or 10! And to say that to your OH was out of order, as I said before it is up to you and OH how many children you have.

Try to not listen to them the best you can and although it is hard, just accept that they will not give you the support you want.

xx

 

[jessy1101]

How dare they make you feel like that and doubt yourself!! They are supose to show u major support and realise that just because they didnt choose having 3 kids doesnt mean they can bitch and moan about your choices! Your life your family grrrrr. It just frustrates me to no end when families do that.

I'm only pregnant for number 2 and this was also a suprise pregnancy. I fell pregnant right after my daughter turned 1. And yes i had a mini like freak out at first becuase i know it's a huge change and etc. But now i'm thrilled! They will b close in age and like the same things and etc.

But we havent even told anybody yet. Our family especialy my in laws are the actual overbearing type. The call every day and so how u feeling, u saving money up to buy this and that and this. Non stop sooooooo we didnt want to have to endure that the first trimester. And my god it's been fantastic! Time has flown by and it's nice to relax and not b bombarbed all the freakin time 'sigh'.

Hang in there hunny and honestly if ever it gets to the point of it being too much u need to flat out tell them that it's your choice and yes it was a suprise but who cares your happy and that's all that mathers. They need to b happy for u not constatnly put you down!

 

[daddiesgift]

If that makes you ashamed then I should go hide under a Rock as my oldest was 5 months when I got pregnant, now my second was 9 months when I fell pregnant again!

There's nothing I hate more than the comments about stopping having babies or someone getting "fixed" good god you'd think they are the ones having to take care of the baby!

I say forget them all and all their comments!

 

[DobbyForever]

I don't have any kids and just got separated. I know it's noy the same, but I get those comments all the time for having so many pets m. Now that I'm expecting and flying solo, the comments turned to look how hard it is to manage your dog when you go away a few days a baby will be harder. My mom didn't appreciate my retort that my brother is not allergic to babies and they don't have baby hotels because babies fly free! unlesd you're oaranoid like me and buy them a seat with a car seat. I'd be scared I'd drop my baby... anyway just trying to make you smile and give you a hug! being parents is always a challenge, but you'll rock it. You've got two great kids as proof.

I miss autocorrect sorry!

 

[Hevalouaddict]

I have 3 under 2 and get the 'how are you going to cope' speech all the time. My answer like a good mama should. Children are gifts and blessings x

 

[2have4kids]

Well you can be ashamed and feel bad and never say anything when they make mean unsolicited comments to you or you can stand up for you and your family and stop the abusive comments in their tracks. Imagine how your future baby will feel if you allow this to continue and they start making remarks to her/him about how he was an accident because you've chosen to hide your head in the sand? Be the strong and assertive person that you are and put a stop to the nasty comments! You will have a lovely family and this is the only thing people should be interested in supporting.

You really need to respond to their remarks and stop the abuse towards your family. And the next time someone mentions getting snipped to your husband maybe he can let that person know that spaying and neutering in his family is meant for dogs and catty people only.

 

[LoveCakes]

And the next time someone mentions getting snipped to your husband maybe he can let that person know that spaying and neutering in his family is meant for dogs and catty people only.

Haha loved this!

There's nothing to be ashamed of. We actually want 3 but no matter what people's opinions they have no right to make you feel bad.

Plus I genuinely don't see what you can't do with 3 that you can with 2?!

 

[Joeyzgirl]

I am in the same boat sadly. We wanted this third child, but we feel like we have to pretend it was a surprise to lessen the blow to people. It really makes me feel ashamed and I hate that feeling. In fact, even though my husband says after this he is done, I don't feel like I am. I would like more children, but that may change once my third comes along. I don't know how many times I have heard "you know what causes that don't you?" I'm 34 years old, yes I know what causes that!
It's my mom I'm having to deal with the most on this and I do find myself guarding everything I say, especially if the kids are being crazy, because I really don't want to hear the "wait til there is 3 lecture"
Don't let them get you down... a baby is a blessing ALWAYS

 

[ChristiansMum]

I am in the same boat sadly. We wanted this third child, but we feel like we have to pretend it was a surprise to lessen the blow to people. It really makes me feel ashamed and I hate that feeling. In fact, even though my husband says after this he is done, I don't feel like I am. I would like more children, but that may change once my third comes along. I don't know how many times I have heard "you know what causes that don't you?" I'm 34 years old, yes I know what causes that!
It's my mom I'm having to deal with the most on this and I do find myself guarding everything I say, especially if the kids are being crazy, because I really don't want to hear the "wait til there is 3 lecture"
Don't let them get you down... a baby is a blessing ALWAYS

I am exactly the same at the moment my daughter is teething and has an ear infection so getting a proper night sleep at the moment is impossible and when ever anyone asks how I am feeling I used to say 'just tired really' and then I would get the comment 'wait until you have 3 you will never get any sleep' so now I just say 'yeh I am fine thanks'.

My mum and dad have gone away on holiday and the day before they get back we go to my FIL's for a few days so I won't actually see them now for a week so I am looking forward to just going to FIL's and relaxing but I have had enough of the comment I am goin to have to start saying something back and if they get upset by it then sod them! But thankyou all for your comments xx