feel like a bad mum.

Discussion in 'Baby Club' started by Mrs-N, Oct 24, 2008.

  1. Mrs-N

    Mrs-N Mummy to Joshua James

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    people say you know what your baby is wanting when they cry, well i havnt got a clue what joshua wants when he is crying.

    does this make me a bad mum?
    coz i feel like it.

    i think its because i dont let him cry when he winges i cuddle him, so if he isnt left to cry i wont learn what he is crying for,right?

    i dont like leaving him to cry.
     
  2. Sarah88

    Sarah88 Full time working mummy

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    Don't worry, most of the time I don't know either!! I only know that when she wakes and whimpers then cries overnight it's coz she's hungry... I prefer not to let her cry too much either!
     
  3. Serene123

    Serene123 Guest

    I only know because Caitlyn doesn't cry for no reason and I can tell the difference between her cries. Not all babies are easy to understand and you are NOT a bad mum!
     
  4. reallytinyamy

    reallytinyamy Mum and step mum

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    ^^ i agree I jnow what Chloe wants purely because she hardly does it. If I cant calm her down I leave her- its usually cos she's over tired and she willcry herself to sleep
     
  5. moomin_troll

    moomin_troll mummy to zane and corey

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    i feel the samr as u i have no idea why Zane is crying most the time n feel awful that i cant help him. i have tried letting him cry but no matter what he doesnt give up crying till he gets a cuddle or food lol

    i find myself crying with him most times cuz i think im a bad mum but hes healthy and when hes not cryin he is a happy baby so i must be doin something right lol

    ur not a bad mum n i no this because if u were a bad mum u wouldnt care
     
  6. ColtonsMom

    ColtonsMom Well-Known Member

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    I feel the same way. Like RIGHT NOW for example, Colton is whining and crying. I just stuck him in his jumperoo. He wont open his mouth for a bottle (and tightens his lips up) so I know thats not it. He aint ate to even need burping, and he isn't wet. I think it's just because he is tired, because he aint slept in 3.5hours, and normally he naps after 2-2.5. But I cannot get him to sleep so I dont know what to do.

    I'm the same with the crying too, I never leave Colton to cry. He will usually whine and then get attention. The only time he ever cries is like when he starts whining and I get up to make his bottle. When he sees it he will start screaming for it like I'm taking too long and he wants it NOW. :dohh:
     
  7. nikky0907

    nikky0907 Well-Known Member

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    :hugs:
    Certainly not a bad mom!
    Like Toria and Amy I only know because she hardly cries.

    It's very hard to know what is it about,and sometimes it's really about nothing and there's not much you can do but just to let them and comfort them.
     
  8. Tinylo

    Tinylo Mum to 2 boys

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    Lewis is exactly the same Mrs N, so your definitely not alone :hugs: I feel bad sometimes not knowing what it he wants too. As long as you've checked all the usual things then all that's left is cuddles, if you don't want to leave him to cry, which I can't do yet!!!

    Saying that I do recognise his "I want attention cry" it kinda goes like this:-
    whaaaa......pause(where is she).......whaaaa........pause(she must be coming soon)......whaaaa.......pause(that'll do it) :rofl:
     
  9. Mamafy

    Mamafy Mum to 5 & Angel Mum to 4

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    Of course your not a bad mum:hugs:

    I've had 5 children now, sometimes I havent got the foggiest:rofl: like the other night Katie woke at 2am, she never wakes up:dohh: Did I know what was wrong her? NO! Was it the last thing I tried? YES!:rofl:

    your not alone hun, you're human:hugs:
     
  10. isil

    isil Well-Known Member

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    Lol Tinylo!

    MrsN - it totally doesn't make you a bad mum as others have said, they don't come with a manual! I'm lucky that Alasdair is a very content and predictable baby (apart from right now because he appears to be getting a tooth!) but it took a long time for him to get predictable!
     
  11. supernurse

    supernurse Mum of 2 beautiful girls

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    Your definately not alone. Ruby cries A LOT and because of this it's hard to know even after 4 1/2 months what she wants.

    I think half the time babies don't really know what they want either.
    On the other hand I feel bad cause I do leave her to cry, I don't want to but when she's the type of baby that cries, as soon as you leave her sight she has to be left.

    I usually think if she's crying but there's no tears then it's attention, maybe not, I don't know!
     
  12. Mrs-N

    Mrs-N Mummy to Joshua James

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    joshua doesnt tend to cry but for example i dont know when he wants a bottle.

    if he crys around 3 hours after his last bottle i just give him another one but yesterday i didnt and i cuddled him and he went to sleep.

    i think thats bad that i dont even know when he is wanting a bottle or not.


    i think im worrying about it coz we are going to visit OH parents next weekend and i wont know when he wants a bottle,i dont want to do him one to then not want it.
    wont his parents think i dont know what im doing
     
  13. princess_bump

    princess_bump Happy Wife & Mumma!

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    :hugs: mrs n your not a bad mum, your a fab mum, i think i have only got to why maddi cry's through trial and error and time. course they wont think you don't no what your doing, your a new mum getting to no your son, your doing a great job :hugs:
     
  14. Samantha675

    Samantha675 Maybe baby #3?!?

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    Most of the time Bren only cries when he is tired or bored. So when it is not either of those things, I am freaking clueless!
     
  15. Soon2be3

    Soon2be3 Guest

    Think of it this way, Do new Mothers to colic babies know why there babies are crying? NOPE not until they go to doctor after doctor trying to figure things out, Even then they are hard to calm down.

    Its the same as when NOT knowing what your baby wants. Im worried about after the twins are born if I'll remember what order to try things in (feed,diaper,burp,sleep)

    Carlee was pushed still is pushed on the boob so much she crys just because she thinks she suppose too
     

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