feeling guilty ..

[BethHx]

I feel guilty about the fact that i don't want to BF.
I'm not going to decide until she's born etc but i just know that i dont actually want to & i much prefer the idea of bottle feeding.
Anyone else feel guilty? Is it normal for me too

 

[bumblebeexo]

I feel guilty too, as I know how many people lecture about not BF. What I keep telling myself though is that I'll still be feeding my child and I won't feel any differently about her, so it's not a big deal. FF is best for me as OH wants to be able to help feed and I also don't feel like I would be confident feeding in front of certain people. Up to you, and at the end of the day if people have nothing better to do than lecture then screw them

 

[ClairAye]

I didn't want to so I didn't and I don't feel bad at all. I express for him and he gets topped up with formula, but when he was just getting formula to start I didn't feel bad At the end of the day there are two options - bottle or breast and you should never feel bad about which one you do They both feed your baby and that's what's important!

 

[MumToBe2012]

I wouldn't feel bad but I can understand why you would - I plan to BF for the first month but then move onto FF and I often get lectured about how BF is healthiest for the baby etc. It's annoying, but you have to ignore them and do what you think is best for YOU and your baby.

 

[MUM0FTW0]

No lol,I didnt feel bad. I used a breast pump...so my son still got what he needed to. If someone is laying it in your head that you should feel guilty then they are nuts. The only time I felt bad was when I wasnt pumping enough and the milk dried up and went away so I had to just use formula alone...but other than that,there is no difference between breast feeding and pumping besides the fact that you cant "bond" with your baby or be "closer" to your baby.which I find really stupid to say in the first place lol there are plenty of ways to bond with your baby other than doing that...if you dont feel right or feel comfortable then so what,its your choice and no one elses

 

[MrsEngland]

I didn't want to so I didn't and I don't feel bad at all. I express for him and he gets topped up with formula, but when he was just getting formula to start I didn't feel bad At the end of the day there are two options - bottle or breast and you should never feel bad about which one you do They both feed your baby and that's what's important!

Couldn't agree more!

Your baby won't turn round to you at 18 and say mum why didn't you breastfeed me!

 

[amygwen]

It's normal to feel that way. A lot of moms do and a lot of others feel exactly opposite. Nothing wrong with what YOU decide to do. It's your baby and you know what is best in your own situation.

With that being said, I did breastfeed and it was such an excellent experience. I would advise anyone just to try, which sounds like you're open to doing since you said you'll make the decision when she is born. Don't feel guilty though, just do what you feel most comfortable. I breastfed but I also bottle fed expressed breast milk to give me a break and others an opportunity to feed him!

 

[Lissa3120]

Don't feel guilty, as long as your feeding your baby, choose to do it the way that suits you and makes you feel more comfortable, don't let anyone pressure you into either option. It has to work best for you.
At the end of the day it's feeding your baby, and there is and should be no shame in feeding your baby however you decided to feed.

 

[fl00b]

i did at first but it soon went away. it's your baby + therefore your decisions! i know plenty of people who had FF babies and they're perfectly healthy so don't beat yourself up about something that you don't wanna do

 

[BethHx]

Everything everyone has said is so true, & i know she won't turn around and ask me why i never etc etc. & i personally don't feel that all the benefits are as 'true' as they make them out to be.
I'm really not sure why i feel guilty, if i never went into the BF section of the site or read other peoples post's about what to do i don't think i would feel as bad. Before when i told OH's mom i was planning on BF she told me i was crazy & that bottle is easier (sheh supports me either way though)
I guess once she's here & in my arms aslong as she's feeding and thriving i won't feel bad, i hope.

 

[x__amour]

Don't let anything you decide make you feel guilty. I was torn about what I wanted to do and decided to wait to see on a lot of things. Breast feeding, pacifiers, co-sleeping, etc. I went with my gut and don't regret a single thing that I did.

 

[BethHx]

Don't let anything you decide make you feel guilty. I was torn about what I wanted to do and decided to wait to see on a lot of things. Breast feeding, pacifiers, co-sleeping, etc. I went with my gut and don't regret a single thing that I did.

I am pretty much like that, i know for certain i won't be co-sleeping, & i really don't want to use a dummy but as for pain relief, breast or bottle, 'daily routine' etc i will just take it as it comes. I just no if i breastfeed i wont be happy but if i formula feed i will be guilty x

 

[Amber4]

Don't let anyone make you feel bad. During my pregnancy I felt so guilty as I never wanted to breastfeed. I just felt so terrible but now I feel fine about my decision. It really wouldn't of been for me looking back Brooke does suffer with reflux and poor weight gain and it has been mentioned I should of bf, but i think that's 100% rubbish. I don't think it makes any difference. Do what makes you happy as a happy Mummy = happy baby xx

 

[HellBunny]

You should do what works for you

I formula fed my first, and he's thriving, did all the milestones on time and has only ever had one cold, didn't have any sickness/diarrhea as a baby which apparently formula increases.
I breastfed finley for a week, i quit as i was starting to resent him (i posted in the formula section on the guilt thread sticky) i won't go into it as i wrote a long post there and i'l end up rambling lol.

In all honesty if i had another baby in the future i would probably formula feed from the start, i might decide different when the time came but as a family, formula/bottle feeding was the best thing we did.


x

 

[X__Kimberly]

Don't feel guilty! I Didn't BF and I heard so many people how I should've and it was the best thing for my baby and how i'm a bad mother for FF blah blah blah. I didn't listen to them once

My baby is 4 months and FF and is a happy little guy =) I don't regret it at all!

 

[beanzz]

you shouldn't feel guilty at all! bf just isnt for some people, for me it was the easy option cos I hated the thought of having to prep bottles and buy formula all the time, thats all yes the bond is amazing but it's not as if you're not going to bond with your child any less if you ff

 

[GirlRacer]

The important thing to remember is that you are not a bad mother just cos you want to formula feed instead of breastfeeding. Its up to you what you do and no one has the right to make you feel guilty etc. I had my son on a sunday morning and I breastfed for about 24-36 hours after he was born and I went home next day and as soon as I got home I decided I couldn't carry on breastfeeding. I'd had lots of help in hospital with latching on but he still wasn't latching properly and he was clawing at his face with his nails cos he was so hungry. So I gave him his first bottle (we'd got some formula in luckily) and he had the whole bottle of it and loved it. He gulped it down like the poor boy was starving! I didn't feel guilty at all then bcos seeing Josh feed so well made me decide that I was doing the right thing. My OH and mum and dad were thrilled too cos it meant they can feed him as well so they can bond better
Most formulas these days are made to be as similar to breast milk as they can nutrient wise, so the baby can get all he/she needs. Me and my brother were formula fed and we're both fine and so are loads of others xx

 

[Linzi_x]

You shouldn't feel bad hun, do what YOU want to do, don't worry about the thoughts of others At the end of the day it's your baby, so trust your instinct and go with the flow

 

[ChesMik4eva]

While I don't think you should feel guilty or beat yourself up about it, I do think you should wait and see how you'll feel once she's born. At least breastfeed her the colostrum, as no formula emulates it.

I've heard many people say they weren't keen on the idea of breastfeeding and ended up loving it. There's so many benefits and not just the physical ones for baby, it's really the easier option rather than having to prep bottles and sterilise them in the middle of the night etc. I am strongly of the view that everyone should try it, then make the decision as to whether it works for them or not. Have you gone to a breastfeeding class or read any books about it? It can give you great confidence.

Good luck with whatever you decide.